Either someone released a live bat into the AT&T center for Halloween, or Dracula has Spurs season tickets. Either way, Manu Ginobili took care of things, swatting down the bloodsucker in cold-blooded horror murder.

I can't wait to see Malcolm Gladwell write a 10,000 word piece equating professional basketball with brutal animal slaughter.

Bats Everywhere Quiver in Fear of Manu [FanHouse]

Bowen was traded from San Antonio to Milwaukee this offseason, where the Bucks quickly bought out his contract, making him a free agent. Even though he's getting up there in age, there are probably plenty of teams that could use an occasional defensive specialist. Unfortunately, the pressures of competing for business in the shady hardcore world of southern Texas salons and spas just demands too much of his time.

Bowen and his wife, Yardley Barbon, are owners of Yardley's Salon & Spa in San Antonio. Last week, the couple walked into a rival salon called "Oasis" and started threatening two of the employees. The employees used to work for Yardley's and Bowen says they stole his company's client list before defecting to their new bosses.

Cops were called, Tweets were sent, "Bruce was cussing, and his wife was making threats, saying she was going to harass clients every day." You do not mess with a man's hair salon, people. How many times do I have say this?

Bruce Bowen, three-time champion with San Antonio Spurs, retiring from basketball [ESPN]
Bruce Bowen and wife involved in confrontation at local spa [WOAI.COM]

The original New York Post story implied that Jefferson dumped his fiance as she waited in a church with her dress on and then skipped town without even telling his guests. Then in a follow up story—that Jefferson even gave an interview for—they said that he dumped her via email as she flew to New York for the wedding. So now he has to go on Howard Stern's and Dan Patrick's radio shows to try and desperately clear up that mess.

Here are Jefferson's talking points: They broke up a week before the wedding, not two hours before. All the friends and family found out on Monday or Tuesday. The email was merely an attempt to clarify his feelings, and not a heartless final kiss off. The boys didn't get the black AMEX card, the wedding cost way less than $2 million, and there was no "six-figure" payoff to make her go away. (Although he will give her some "move on with your life" money.) The couple was fighting all the time, so they agreed to end it. That's all.

But why were they fighting? Who gave the email to the Post? And why would people decide, suddenly at just this moment, to accuse Richard of being gay?

Jefferson thinks it's just the New York Media being the New York Media, but it's not like that part of the story is brand new. Speculation about a gay New Jersey Net has fluttered quietly around Jefferson for a few years. The Post finally elevated it from salacious rumor to "legitimate" line of inquiry, but Jefferson strongly denied the rumor to the paper. You can fight the internet! (But you're probably going to lose.)

So there you go. The dude didn't want to get married. I'm sure that's never happened before.

Richard Jefferson clears up rumors about cancelled wedding [Dan Patrick]
FORMER NET RICHARD JEFFERSON DUMPS FIANCEE KESHA NI'COLE NICHOLS BY EMAIL [New York Post]
Richard Jefferson Goes On Howard Stern to Clear the Air on Dumping His Cheerleader Fiancee By Email and Giving Her a ‘Settlement' [Big Lead]

There's no way of knowing if Jefferson's recent trade to San Antonio after a year in Milwaukee played a role in the breakup, but Jefferson's "boys" showed up at a swanky Manhattan hotel on Saturday for their buddy's $2 million wedding, completely unaware that it already been canceled. He did make it up to them by giving his black American Express card to one of the guys, so that instead of consoling their friend over the demise of his future they could eat $500 sushi and drink the entire contents of their mini-bars. Now that's a stand up guy.

Oh, and the bride-to-be got a room upgrade so everyone's a winner!

RICHARD JEFFERSON LEAVES BRIDE AT THE ALTAR EXAGGERATED NY POST HEADLINE [New York Post]

Christopher James Carolan—who was already wanted on an unrelated burglary charge—worked for Price Security Company, and was assigned to provide security services to Parker's home. He abruptly resigned last month and then the very next day—lo and behold—he listed an autographed Michael Jordan jersey on Craigslist. A jersey much like the one that used to belong to Parker! How about that!

Are you ready for the dumbest part of the story?

The jersey was listed on Craigslist for $500 or best offer, but sheriff's investigators said the jersey has a value of $20,000.

I'm starting to suspect that this guy didn't really know what he was doing.

Tony Parker's Stolen Jersey Recovered [KSAT]
Guard accused of stealing from Tony Parker [San Antonio Express-News]

When last we saw them: Finished 56-26, second in the Southwest Division and tied for second overall in the West. Eliminated by the Lakers in the Western Conference Finals after Manu Ginobili blew a tire.

New: George Hill, Roger Mason, Salim Stoudamire

Oooooold: Brent Barry, Damon Stoudamire, Robert Horry

The Good: You know, any 2008-09 San Antonio Spurs preview is going to read like most 2007-08 Spurs previews. Tim Duncan is one of the best power forwards ever, one of the best centers ever, and one of the best forward-centers ever. Nothing's changed there. (Nor has the fact that he will remain boring and overlooked...except by the people who fall all over themselves to remark on how overlooked he is.) Tony Parker can get to the hoop at will and stick that little midrange jumper more often than you think he should. Manu Ginobili drives, shoots and flops as well as anybody. (And, actually, he flops better than just about anybody.) Gregg Popovich will use his mad scientist-like genius to manage the Three Amigos' minutes and make all the spare parts play with surprising effectiveness. They will continue to be a smothering defensive team while running a precise and efficient (read that: slow and boring) offense. In other words: Same old, same old. To spice things up, here are a few words from Liston of Introducing Liston: "Uh, duh, we're the Spurs. We run shit. We have Tim Duncan and, in case you hadn't heard, he's a super robot sent back in time to do two things: (1) win championships, and (2) wear button-up shirts with anime on them like a total hardass. And don't give me any of that 'Well, you guys are old and Manu is already hurt and Tony's jumper is, for the most part, unreliable again and last year Chris Paul and Kobe Bryant showed how someone intent on driving into the lane can totally make you guys look like crap' crap."

The Bad: They're old. Yes, again, just like they were last season. Only, you know, plus one year. Bruce Bowen is 37, Kurt Thomas is 36, Michael Finley is 35, Fabricio Oberto and Jacque Vaughn are both 33, Duncan is 32 and Ume Idoka is 31. Hell, the Spurs had to leave Robert Horry and Damon Stoudamire unsigned just so they could go to McDonald's and buy coffee without having the senior citizen discount forced on them. At some point, they're going to have to restock the shelves with some young, top-tier talent. Right? Ginobili isn't expected back until mid-December due to ankle surgery, and that guy is wicked-important to everything the Spurs do (including shoe-tying Rubik's cube-solving and bathroom-going). According to some complex metrics and voodoo doctoring, the Spurs completely forgot how to make pointage at the end of last season and into the playoffs. And, in case you didn't know, the NBA still requires teams to outscore them opponents to claim victory. Now, more from Liston: "The Spurs are old and Manu is already hurt and Tony's jumper is, for the most part, unreliable again and last year Chris Paul and Kobe Bryant showed how someone intent on driving into the lane can totally make us look like crap."

Fun Facts: Last season, Manu Ginobili was fourth - behind LeBron, Kobe Bryant and Dirk Nowitzki - in clutch scoring, netting five points per 48 minutes of "clutch time" (the last five minutes of the fourth quarter or overtime). Tony Parker has shot an average of 52.2 percent since 2005-06, and no guard has shot better in that time period. TD has snared 595 double-doubles since the start of the 1997-98 season, second only to Kevin Garnett (605). Still more from Liston: "Gregg Popovich grew a beard over the summer and, to quote myself, 'Having a beard is like using your face to silently tell people, I will fight you simply because it's Tuesday. With regard to masculinity, it's the penultimate facial accessory. It's less clichéd than a mustache, more intentional than a scar (that might be the official slogan, actually). Essentially, that fact alone should guarantee another 'ship. And, honestly, I'd be surprised if we lost one game this year.'"

Videotastic extra: And now you, too, have been Ginobili'd.

"The only thing I call cowardly is when you're up by 10 and do it. That's a cowardly move. I didn't say nothing last year, but that's a coward move. They should really do something about that. When you're down, I can see using it as a strategy, but when you're up 10, 15 points, there's really no need for that. I was fine with that. It doesn't work. It may work in a series, but it's not going to get you to the championship. San Antonio tried it, but they went home a couple weeks after we went home. I just have to go to the line and make them pay. And I will."

And I truly believe that Shaq really will make the Spurs pay. Assuming he employs the same method of "vengeance" he used against Kobe Bryant in last year's NBA Finals (i.e., let the Boston Celtics do it for him). Of course, Shaq also let everybody know that the best offense is, as always, getting him the ball and letting him re-distribute it to open shooters. That's how contracts are made, baby!

"You know, and it's just common sense, I got two guys on me, somebody's open. So like I've been telling the young guys and telling Raja, is that, there's a lot of guys who got new contracts off me, just knowing where to be, you know, all the way from Travis Knight to Damon Jones. That's just being in the right spot at the right time and I'm getting it to them. Jason Kapono, James Posey..."

That's right. The Hornets acquired Posey this summer because of all those open shots Shaq was getting him last...wait a minute. Oh, and about the Suns' defense:

"If our guards can't stay in front of guards, I don't know how you expect a big guy to stay in front of guards."

Regarding the redonkulous three-pointer Tim Duncan hit to send Game 1 of the previously mentioned playoff series into overtime:

"If I pick up Parker, somebody gotta pick up Duncan. [There was] no rotation, no nothing. Like, you know, like the last play of the game where they said 'switch,' and when I switch, nobody took Tim. He hit a fucking three."

Just to sum all this up for you: Popovich is a coward, Shaq doubles as an agent for all his current and former teammates, and his defensive shortcomings are all somebody else's fault. Yep, that about covers it.

Shaq calls Spurs cowards, rips Nash and Suns' defense [Ball Don't Lie]

Shaq calls Spurs Cowards and Disses Nash and Amare [Bright Side of the Sun]

"Follow your dreams. You can reach your goals. I'm living proof. Beefcake. BEEFCAKE!!" It's hard to believe that we're less than a year removed from Kobe Bryant embarrassing himself and his teammates on some random dude's video phone, calling the Lakers' front office "a mess" in a semi-staged radio interview, flip-flopping on trade demands, and then stating flatly - regarding a potential trade destination - that "At this point I'll go play on Pluto." Now he's the league MVP and his team is heading to the NBA Finals. Will this become the new model for team success? Should Tracy McGrady blast Yao Ming for always getting injured and let Houston GM Daryl Morey have it for not surrounding him with better players? Should Amare Stoudemire tell Steve Kerr he'd rather go play on Cybertron than watch Shaq shamble up and down the court in Phoenix? I don't know. But it's a whole new world out there, and after last night's series-clinching victory over the defending champion Spurs, it's starting to feel like that world belongs to Kobe and the Lakers.

Mamba scored 39 points and almost doubled his free throw output for the series (5-for-5) in L.A.'s 100-92 win, slowly and methodically tearing Bruce Bowen's heart out like a Thuggee cultist. But while it may have seemed like a one-man show at certain points, Kobe simply had more help and more young, healthy, athletic bodies than Tim Duncan. Pau Gasol finished with 12 points, 19 rebounds, 5 assists and 4 blocked shots, and he helped harrass and frustrate Duncan into another off shooting night (7-for-19). Lamar Odom (13 points, 5-for-10, 8 rebounds) did a little of this and a little of that. Vladimir Radmanovic, Sasha Vujacic and Luke Walton all overcame their personal hair tragedies to hit some big threes. And Ronny Turiaf was just really freaking happy to be there. My point? The Lakers were superior. And Gregg Popovich knows it.

Said Pops: "(The Spurs) just played a team that was better. That's why the Lakers won. The better team won. You get a seven-game series, you win four games, you're the best team."

TD led San Antonio with a T-D of 19 points, 15 rebounds and 10 assists, but he became increasingly frustrated by his inability to get it going on offense. That frustration culminated late in the game when he tried — and failed — to use a little elbow magic on Gasol's face to get to the hoop. Tony Parker added 23 points (11-for-22), and the Spurs also got contributions from Michael Finley (13 points, 2-for-3 from downtown), Brent Barry (11 points, 3-for-5 from distance) and Kurt Thomas (11 points, 7 rebounds).

But they didn't get what they needed the most: A big game from Manu Ginobili. Manu scored only 9 points on 3-for-9 shooting, committed 3 turnovers, and missed a wide-open three-pointer that would have given San Antonio a one-point lead in the final minutes. Ginobili's transformation into Jim Paxson circa 1989 is as much a reason as any that the Spurs' bid to repeat met with a grisly demise.

And now the Lakers get to rest and relax while they wait to see which 80s flashback they're going to get in the Finals. To be continued...

Thanks for nothing, NBA. The league office has come out and officially stated the totally freaking obvious: Derek Fisher fouled Brent Barry on the final play of Game 4. And it should have been called outright or replay should have been used. But aw shucks, it wasn't! I'm sure that'll make the Spurs players and coaches feel so much better when they get eliminated tonight whenever.

Kobe's free throws. Mamba shot 89 free throws in six second-round games against the Utah Jazz. His four-game total against the Spurs? Six. Which includes the zero he had in Game 4. Uh...wow? Said Kobe: "I don't know about that. That's one of the mysteries of the world."

Bruce Bowen is the Flash! No, really. Phil Jackson, naturally, has his own little theory on the subject of Mamba's missing free throws. "The basis is guys getting their hands on players, and that's what referees judge. Two hands particularly, it's a call, and Bowen is faster than the eye in that regard. He's really quick with his hands, so he gets in and bothers but he can back out before the shots are up usually, and so you have to give him credit. He's obviously an illusionist at some level." Wait a sec, Phil. Does Bruce have superhuman speed or dark wizard powers? It's gotta be one or the other; it can't be both.

Thanks for nothing, Captain Obvious. Buck Harvey of the San Antonio Express-News wants you to know that there's no pro-big market team conspiracy in the NBA. Sure, Buck. And Jesus was just a nice Jewish boy who bled fruit punch.

Thanks for nothing, Benedict Arnold Obvious. Derek Fisher, master of the non-foul, would like to share some shocking news with you. "[The Spurs are] the defending champions, and we're going to have to play another good 48-minute basketball game in order to beat them." Okay. I'm done.

Thanks for nothing, Mr. Foreign Dignitary Obvious. Manu Ginobili is full of the ancient wisdom of Argentina. "Down 3-1, we know it's really hard to come back. But we're going to try." I'd feel a little better about that last part if Manu had tried more than once in the last four games. Speaking of which...

Manu Ginobili. After hours of porn film review and analyzing breast size various important statistics, I have isolated an amazing trend: When Manu Ginobili plays well, the Spurs win. When he sucks, they lose. The bad news for San Antonio: He's sucked thrice in four games. Maybe his underwear's too tight. Has anybody checked that? Well, get on it!

Kobe's at least half-right. Regarding his team's Chuck Norris-ness: "We're a tough bunch. I think we've grown into a tough team mentally. I think we've grown up. Quick learners — we're all just intelligent idiots." Aw, that was a softball pitch. I can't hit that.

Youth versus experience, Part V. It hasn't looked that good for experience so far, has it? But Gregg Popovich is calling shenanigans. "When we win, we're the experienced team. When we lose, we're older than dirt. That's just silly." You're right, Gregg. It is silly. Let's just say your guys are older than dirt and leave it at that, okay?

"Ray, everybody has three mortgages nowadays." Want to go to the Staples Center and see the Lakers play in the Western Conference Finals? Good luck. Hey, max out five or six credit cards and sell one of your children into slavery, and it should be no problemo! I suggest selling the middle child. That's the one who's usually screwed up, right?

Prediction. History repeats itself and the Spurs' bid to repeat ends in failure. Lakers win. By a lot.

We've found that the people least upset about the call are those associated with the Spurs. Gregg Popovich was cool with it, and even the Spurs bloggers are Zen about the whole thing.

Please don't Spurs fans. Just don't. Yes, it was an obvious foul on Derek Fisher. Yes, it should have been two free throws. But, but, but:



1. Derek Fisher's shot with 5 seconds left, the one that hit the Corpse of Robert Horry's knee and went out of bounds, grazed the rim. The shot clock should have been reset, forcing the Spurs to foul. This would have changed everything.



2. The goal tend call on Lamar Odom with under a minute left was incorrect. It looked correct at game speed, but the replace clearly showed he got the ball before it hit the rim. This would have changed everything.



3. Kobe Bryant shot the ball 29 times. He took 0 free throws.


Complaining about free throws is just grasping at straws, like a vanquished foe begging for their life. It's unbecoming.

This is probably the Spurs' last run at all this ... oh, who are we kidding? They'll be back in the conference finals every year until Duncan's son is running the point.

The Bell Tolls For We [Pounding The Rock]

The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who can't wait to see how David Stern fixes tonight's Pistons-Celtics game in favor of Boston. When he's not coming up with new NBA Finals conspiracy theories, he can be found humming a jaunty tune at Basketbawful. Enjoy!

No soup call for you! The Spurs had plenty of culprits in last night's Game 4 loss to the Lakers. There was Tim Duncan, who missed 16 shots. And Manu Ginobili, who scored only 7 points (2-for-8) and was an Obi-Wan Kenobi-like ghost of his Game 3 self. There were Fabricio Oberto, Michael Finley and Ime Udoka, who combined for zero points in almost 40 minutes of "action." There was Kurt Thomas and his mario. And, of course, there were the old legs that surrendered a 46-37 rebounding advantage and an Oliver Miller-sized edge in second chance points (26-4). But, in the end, the guiltiest parties may have been Joey Crawford, Joe Forte and Mark Wunderlich...the three wise(guy) monkeys who apparently could see no evil, hear no evil, and certainly couldn't call any evil.

It was a classic hump game for San Antonio. The home team fell behind by 14 in the first quarter, fought back to make it close, but could never quite overtake the Lakers. They trailed 93-86 with 50 seconds to play, then made a furious rally - thanks to a couple missed freethrows by Pau Gasol, a three by Manu, a miss by Kobe, and a goaltending call on Lamar Odom — to pull within 93-91 with 28 seconds to play. L.A. burned up most of the shot clock before Derek Fisher tossed up a jumper that was apparently all air, but the Spurs knocked the ball out of bounds. The Lakers inbounded to Kobe, who missed a rushed shot, and San Antonio snared the rebound with 2.1 seconds left. Plenty of time, right?

It was, too. Enough for Brent Barry — who turned back the clock with a 23-point performance — to catch, pump fake Fisher into the air, absorb the contact, and attempt a three-pointer. Two problems, though: Barry missed by a mile and the veteran officiating crew totally and completely blew the call. Now guess which ref was closest to the play...

Look, it was a foul. Marv Albert and Doug Collins knew it was a foul. Henry Abbott knew it was a foul. Freaking Helen Keller would have known it was a foul. But don't take my word for it. If you didn't watch it live, here's the video:

And that was the ballgame.

Of course, Fish didn't think it was a foul. "I think we met simultaneously, and there was contact for sure. But I don't think I ran through him." Suuuuure, Fish.

Credit the Spurs for being classy about the whole fiasco, though. Barry said "That's not going to get called in the Western Conference Finals" and Gregg Popovich added "If I was the official I wouldn't have called that a foul."

Kobe Bryant led the Lakers with 28 points, 10 rebounds, and 1 lonely assist. Lamar Odom had a redemption game with 16 points, 9 rebounds, and near-perfect free throw shooting (8-for-9). The Mad Spaniard had 10 points, 10 boards, and 6 assists. Timmy D had 29 points and 17 rebounds for the Spurs, who also got 23 points and 9 assists from Tony Parker.

The final game of the series is Thursday in L.A.

Manu Ginobili. He was the unquestioned goat of Games 1 and 2, and even moreso the unquestioned hero of Game 3. His "In yo face, suckah!" performance (30 points, 9-for-15, 5-for-7 in threes) was pretty damn impressive...especially when you consider he's doing it with an arthritic ankle. Ouch. Seriously, though, some of those threes were wacko - one of them even made Kobe laugh - and I don't know if that kind of lightning is going to strike twice. So the Spurs are going to need some...

Commodore Obvious! This is what Tim Duncan thinks the Spurs need to do to beat the Lakers in Game 4: "We have to contain them, limit what they do They have the best scorer in the league. He can get off in stretches. We have to be able to contain the rest of their team and understand that defense is what's going to get us over the hump."

Kobe Bryant, Part I. Dig this: Mamba shot 96 free throws in round two against the Utah. He's had six so far against San Antonio. No, you read that right. Apparently, the Spurs don't commit fouls. Amazing.

Kobe Bryant, Part II. Now dig this: Mamba isn't as overwhelming when he's facing a Bruce Bowen who has a Tim Duncan watching his back. This is a mystery that even the power of Mighty Science may never unlock.

Kobe Bryant, Part III. Apparently, dude was a bastard even back in high school. I'm shocked, I tell you. Shocked.

Brent Barry. The Spurs could use somebody other than Ginobili to spread the floor. Barry is a known floor-spreader. Timmy wants Barry to get more minutes. You getting all this, Gregg?

Lamar Odom. He had a real "WTF?!" performance in Game 3: 7 points on 2-for-11 shooting, five missed free throws, and a game-high 5 turnovers. It was enough to keep a guy up at night. And it did. Lamar couldn't sleep after the game. And Phil Jackson understood why. "I like players to get their rest, there's no doubt. But any time you have a game of that importance and you don't play well, you're upset. It's bothersome." Bothersome? Dandruff is bothersome. The stink bomb Lamar dropped in Game 3 was more than "bothersome." But whatever. I'm calling it now: Lamar will bounce back tonight.

Ronny Turiaf. He's crazy. Like, eat-you-and-wear-your-skin crazy.

The box score from the game reads like something out of The Complete Idiot's Guide To Ass Whoopin'. The Lakers bitchslapped the Spurs in just about every way possible: They outshot 'em (55 percent to 34 percent), outfreethrowed 'em (20-10), outrebounded 'em (44-36) and outbenched 'em (34-26). Kobe Bryant scored 22 points (10-for-17), but it seemed like twice that. Lamar Odom looked more Batman than Robin (20 points, 12 rebounds, 4 blocked shots). And Pau Gasol (10 points, 7 boards)...that dude's just crazy.

Meanwhile, San Antonio's big guns ran out of ammo, especially in the second half. Tony Parker "led" the Spurs with 13 points and 4 assists, but shot 6-for-15. Timmy Duncan had a double-double (12 points, 16 rebounds) but shot 6-for-14. And Manu continued to earn the "Shoeless Joe Ginobili" nickname I gave him (7 points, 2-for-8, a couple flops).

Said Ginobili: "I blame myself for these two losses." So do we, Manu. So do we. Now you've got two choices: Live for nothing, or die for something. Your call.

Game 4 3 is on Sunday in San Antonio.

As FanIQ pointed out yesterday, the Spurs have played in three of the lowest rated series since 1982, and last year's series — which had freaking LeBron in it — was the worst ever. Even though we're somewhat sympathetic to the "appreciate the Spurs" sentiment, that doesn't mean we actually want to watch them play. From the looks of it — allotting for the usual Nielsen mystery — you don't either.

Keep The Spurs Out Of The Finals [FanIQ]

At the peril of divulging my devotion to my bloglines reader, I have to say I am particularly fond of the running joke that Gawker has on Slate (both of which are favorite websites of mine). The joke is basically pointing out how much Slate just looooooves to flip conventional wisdom on its head. In a jab at Slate’s recent assertion that we Americans should feel lucky for only paying four dollars a gallon for gas, Gawker snarks:

Gas... is cheap! An economist on how expensive cigarettes make smokers happy! Ugly people: are they actually pretty? Plus: Chris Hitchens on how George W. Bush was a better president than Lincoln! Tomorrow: Are you hungry? No you're not!

Comedy. Now, at the risk of pulling over-flipping the script myself here, I want to proclaim that after heavy thought and scrutiny, I have realized that Tim Duncan is this millennium’s answer to Michael Jordan, the actual heir to MJ’s throne that we have been searching for all along, and the obvious successor that we have overlooked when he was standing in our midst all along. Put another way, it is fucking astonishing that the Spurs beat the Suns in five games and the Hornets in New Orleans, and this outcome is pretty much solely because of Timmy D. Parker, Ginobili, Popovich, and Horry be damned.

Sure, Parker makes quick and precise decisions, Ginobili is perturbing to the point of causing psychological damage, Horry evokes severe anxiety in late-and-close game situations, and Popovich conveys an eerie calm. Yet it is Duncan whose presence alone encapsulates all of these things, which makes him the single greatest player since Michael Jordan. I’m not gonna play up the MJ comparison too much (because we go into much greater detail about Mike and his legacy in the forthcoming FreeDarko book (IN STORES NOVEMBER 11), but I will characterize what the now ethereal and almost fanciful legend of Jordan stood for: Dominance, Championship, and most Relentlessness.

These are not simply vacant or clichéd terms. Dominance refers to the fact that Jordan was the best of his era. All things considered, Duncan can say the same for himself. You know how after Duncan and Shaq got a few MVP awards, they sort of just got dropped from frontrunner status in the years that followed? Garnett, Nash, Dirk, and then Kobe got in the mix, and it was almost as though the voters and the public were saying, “OK, let’s just exclude Duncan and Shaq from the conversation because they’re these incomprehensible gigantic physical specimens that don’t even count,” just how we will come to talk about Barry Bonds and the home run records. Get what I’m saying? And now, Duncan has outlasted Shaq, with as many rings (and perhaps more?) to show for himself. That is dominance.

A championship is essentially the outcome of dominance. It is as though the Rube Goldberg machine spits out a ring at the end of Duncan’s churning. And although Duncan has never won two championships in a row, his record in the postseason is unmatched, and he has become a permanent fixture in postseason lore.

It is this last quality of relentlessness that I believe separates Duncan from his peers. To present a contrast — and I alluded to this over on FreeDarko — what I can’t stand about the post-Iverson era is how many players seem to hold back on us, only to reemerge at a later point in time. Steve Nash flutters around as a one-dimensional all-star on the Mavericks, and a couple years later he turns into White Confucius. Baron Davis comes out of nowhere as a playoff savior for an all-but-forgotten franchise. Paul Pierce drops 40 points in a key game when we thought his career was over years ago. And Peja Stojakovic comes out of the woodwork to say, “Remember me?! I WILL BUST YOU.”

I can only conclude that (putting on my Skip Bayless voice) in the endorsement/mega-contract age players simply hold out a bit on us more than they used to. Injuries, their team’s draft positioning, fear of failure and necessity to secure that next big contract all take hold of these players, and at least for a moment, they let up. They say, “You know what? I’m gonna get my shit together for next year, or I’m gonna take this summer and really work on my free throws/footwork/outside shot/whatever. I’m gonna take some time to heal. I’m gonna just wrap this season up and see what happens once I complain that I don’t have enough help around me.” Duncan, on the other hand, has never once let up, never looked toward the future, toward his legacy, or toward anything except his duty. That is what relentless means. The guy has faced consistent injuries throughout his career, and not once has he taken a season off to facilitate some unknowable future.

Now what happens when the best player of his era meets the best player right now, and one that will potentially become the best of all-time? Nobody on the Spurs, a 56-year-old Bruce Bowen included, can guard Kobe right now. Yet a Kobe-versus-everybody matchup might be playing right into the Spurs' hands. I see a lot of anger coming from Kobe’s direction. I see a lot of elbows flying on both sides. The lanky swords of Lamar Odom dueling with the flailing nunchucks of Manu Ginobili. A barrage of three-pointers from Ime Udoka, Michael Finley, Vladimir Radmanovic and Sasha Vujacic. I see the Lakers having an edge in pure speed (“speed” is the new “size”), but I also see Los Angeles trembling in tense moments, with a squad of players that—except for Kobe and Derek Fisher—have not been in deep playoff pressure situations before.

So, how does this end? In any toss-up situation or game 7, I use a simple rule of thumb, which is that the team that has more to lose…will win. Think of the squeaker series’ during these playoffs. Boston’s two Game 7s—they were faced with the possibility of disgracing the entire Celtics legacy, and they pulled it out. Think about the Lakers versus Utah—were they really going to squander their post-Gasol magic by letting a bunch of screaming Utah-ites into their heads? And then there was New Orleans versus San Antonio, when it came down to it, you could tell that the young core of West, Paul, and Chandler had the feeling of, “well, we can always get back here next year,” whereas the Spurs were facing the ultimate demise of their decade-long dynasty. More to lose…equals a win.

And I say whereas the Lakers might look ahead to a full season of Bynum, Gasol, and Kobe on the same court for a full season, the Spurs aren’t ready to loosen their grip of death on the league just yet. I’ll give them one more championship, to cement their place in history and to ship millions of NBA fans back to their families in coffins, bearing the burden of having watched this game with so much patience over the past 10 years of San Antonio’s reign.

To remind:

1986, 1988: Lakers sweep Spurs 3-0 in the first round. OK, those don't count, even thought 1988 Spurs team did have Jeff Lamp. We love lamp.

1995: Spurs beat Lakers 4-2 in the conference seminfinals before losing to Houston in the conference finals. Interesting note: That Spurs team had Dennis Rodman AND Moses Malone.

1999: Spurs swept the Lakers 4-0 in the conference semis again. This series featured the last game as the Los Angeles Forum. Check out this clip, featuring Bob Costas as lead play-by-play guy.

2001: Another sweep, with the Shaq/Kobe/PhilJax Lakers blasting past the Spurs. The leading scorer in the clinching game? Derek Fisher. Check out NBA.com's archaic page about the 2001 playoffs.

2002: The Spurs grab one more game, but that's it, losing 4-1 to the Lakers in the conference semis. Remember when Rick Fox was good?

2003: Revenge! The Spurs take out a feuding Shaq and Kobe en route to their second title.

2004: The Lakers come right back — in what was a thrilling postseason all around — with that Kobe/Shaq/Karl Malone/Gary Payton/Little Mexican Girls team and beat the Spurs in six. The Derek Fisher shot in Game 5 was the most memorable game of this series. (The Pistons officially ended the Lakers dynasty in the Finals.)

And that was it; it has taken the Lakers that long to recover and rebuild once Shaq left. The Spurs, however, have won two titles since then and never really went anywhere. And here we are, with Game 1 tomorrow night.

Before we forget them, though, let's salute Chris Paul and the Artists Formerly Known As NOOCH.