Sprinting Weirdo Heath Bell Has Retired

Everyone knows prospect Trea Turner is the Padres' "player to be named later" who is heading to the Nationals, but the rules say he can't officially be traded until June. It's a weird spring training for him. » 3/06/15 3:32pm 3/06/15 3:32pm

James Shields and the Padres have reportedly agreed on a four-year deal, and it looks like it'll be the largest contract San Diego has ever handed out. Shields joins a new-look Padres team that includes Justin Upton, Wil Myers, Will Middlebrooks, Matt Kemp, and Derek Norris. » 2/09/15 9:02am 2/09/15 9:02am

Nationals Trade For Prospect Who Is Stuck On The Padres Until June

Baseball is weird, and its weirdness has claimed another victim. This time, it's Nationals, er, Padres shortstop Trea Turner. Turner was traded from San Diego to Washington in the three-team, 11-player Wil Myers trade. But Turner can't join the Nats until mid-June. » 12/20/14 11:17am 12/20/14 11:17am

Padres Trade For Justin Upton, Are All The Way Out Here

The San Diego Padres continue to be very committed to making baseball fans everywhere mutter, "The shit is going on with the Padres?" on a daily basis. Today, the team traded a package of young players to the Braves for Justin "The Good Upton" Upton. » 12/19/14 11:34am 12/19/14 11:34am

Report: Matt Kemp Trade Held Up Because He Has Old-Lady Hips

The Padres were all set to add two big new pieces to their outfield with Wil Myers and Matt Kemp both coming in via semi-blockbuster trades, but the Kemp deal has hit a last-minute snag, thanks to the 30-year-old's arthritic hips. » 12/18/14 1:00pm 12/18/14 1:00pm

Dodgers Screw Up So Hard, Commit Three Errors On One Play

The Dodgers pulled off a blooper for the ages tonight against the Padres. Let's go over it slowly and appreciate how terrible it was. » 9/09/14 2:07am 9/09/14 2:07am

Adorable Kid Hugs His Dad For Catching A Foul Ball

Here we have a brief moment from this afternoon's Padres-Braves game and, god damn, is it ever the cutest. Dad and son take in an afternoon ballgame when all of sudden, a foul ball comes their way. Triumphant dad displays the ball he has just snagged, his son echoes that triumph for exactly one second, and then hugs… » 7/28/14 7:45pm 7/28/14 7:45pm

Tim Lincecum Throws No-Hitter, Dresses Up Like Patriotic Knight

This is how you celebrate a no-hitter. After throwing his second in as many seasons against the Padres earlier today, Tim Lincecum threw on a USMNT shirt and a knight's helmet, and paraded around the locker room to the delight of his teammates. » 6/25/14 7:40pm 6/25/14 7:40pm

Padres Reliever Alex Torres Is First To Wear Padded Cap On MLB Mound

Padres reliever Alex Torres became the first MLB pitcher to wear a protective cap during last night's game against the Dodgers. The hat was very noticeable. » 6/22/14 10:00am 6/22/14 10:00am

Tony Gwynn Was The Babe Ruth Of Not Striking Out

Since Tony Gwynn died Monday, many stories have been written about what a great player he was. But among all the mentions of his eight batting titles and 15 All-Star games, there's an extraordinary facet of his game that goes slightly underappreciated even as it's constantly mentioned—his incredible ability to make… » 6/19/14 4:20pm 6/19/14 4:20pm

I Was Tony Gwynn's Bat Boy

The baseball-card collection I had as a teen—145,000 cards in all when I last bothered to count, 800-count box after 800-count box, all of them occupying a dusty bookcase in my bedroom—was sold years ago. Some random stranger now owns that collection of 400 Tom Glavine rookie cards I bought on speculation at $.04… » 6/17/14 3:26pm 6/17/14 3:26pm

Keith Olbermann Tearfully Remembers Tony Gwynn

There will never be enough tributes to Tony Gwynn. There can't ever be, not for a man who seemed as beloved as a person as he was respected as a hitter. Keith Olbermann's monologue last night started off with a story that highlighted Gwynn's prowess and humility, and ended with tears. "What you hoped Tony Gwynn was… » 6/17/14 10:14am 6/17/14 10:14am

How Tony Gwynn Cracked Baseball's Code And Became A Legend

If you're not old enough to remember, you may not believe it, but there was a time when Tony Gwynn was an incredible athlete, not just in the sense that he had the freakish hand-eye coordination of an eight-time National League batting champion, but in the sense that he could run and jump with anyone. There are traces… » 6/16/14 5:22pm 6/16/14 5:22pm

Padres Turn Tarp Into Slip 'N Slide

The infield was covered up before last night's Padres-Phillies game (it got underway on time), so Yasmani Grandal and Everth Cabrera did what any self-respecting adult should do in that situation. » 6/11/14 10:12am 6/11/14 10:12am

A Goddamned Dinosaur Threw Out The First Pitch At The Padres Game

A dinosaur—an honest-to-goodness dinosaur—trotted to the mound and threw a ball to a hydrocephalic cartoon friar and then the Padres and Royals went and played baseball anyway. One of the largest hypercarnivores to ever walk the earth, here, in San Diego, after 65 million years of extinction, and we're just supposed… » 5/07/14 5:09pm 5/07/14 5:09pm