If you follow the insane micromovements of the baseball hot stove season, you probably, over the past year or two, had a reaction like the one Hardball Talk had in February. "Apparently, Gary Sheffield is an agent," the headline read. Sheffield had just negotiated a minor-league deal for journeyman knuckleballer Josh…

Yankee Analysts has gathered a bunch of data on the offseason prose of Jon Heyman, who is super-rich, and who recently jumped from Sports Illustrated to CBS. Their conclusion: he writes about Scott Boras clients more than anyone else does.

Major League Baseball is merciful enough to not force its annual three-day draft onto us in the form of a television package deal with weeping grandmothers and incarcerated fathers. For that, we are grateful. But we'll admit that it would have made for great television to see Scott Boras react to Bud Selig's old club…

A ranking, courtesy of our friends at Business Insider.

You don't need college sports to have agents currying the favor of amateurs with a nice cash payment. Now up: Scott Boras's company, which has allegedly been providing loans and payments to top Dominican prospects.

Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.

"The bees occupied his front-row seats directly behind home plate for the first two innings. They were removed with the help of a vacuum during the third inning." And then, lo, the Lord hardened the superagent's heart. [AP]

The Nationals locked up the best pitching prospect ever with 77 seconds to spare, and Scott Boras once again nudged the whole draft right up to the point of going tilt.

Everything bad that has ever happened to the Dodgers is the fault of evil, evil Scott Boras, up to and including that home run he hit off Ralph Branca in 1951. [NYT]

Someone took an "unknown hard, long object" to Scott Boras' Land Rover while it was parked outside a Newport Beach restaurant. Damage totaled $2,000, but only after bitter negotiations between Boras and his claims adjuster. [Corona Del Mar Today]