Who do the 0-2 Lions have at running back that they're so proud of? Try Kevin Smith and Rudi Johnson. The two men have combined for 104 yards on 30 carries so far this season. And Benson and Alexander have to wait for one of these guys to be injured to have a shot. Benson's collapse from the overall #3 draft pick by the Bears has been well-chronicled but at least he's done something to fall off the face of the running back earth. Alexander? He's had injuries and gone from NFL MVP in 2005 to being unemployed. Now he's on the will-call list in event of injury for the Lions.

The NFL, it waits for no man. Except for Cedric Benson? As I was about to post this the Detroit News reported that an Austin television station is saying Benson is signing with the Lions. In typical fashion, the Lions have said they aren't signing either man. We'll see.

Shaun Alexander works out for Lions [M Live]

Lions look at RBs, including Alexander, Benson [Detroit Free-Press]

It was overdue. Alexander has been an overrated running back his entire career despite all the touchdowns and the MVP year when Steve Hutchinson should have won the award for opening the holes. Alexander was a soft runner, a mediocre blocker, a below average receiver and an egotistical "me-firster". Bring on a replacement who runs with authority.

Shaun is taking the high road on this, of course, saying that he'll continue to live in the Seattle area that the city is "woven into the fabric of his family" or something and that he's not bittter at all. One memory of Shaun Alexander that sticks out is that bizarre, girlish dance he did on the sidelines during a Seahawks playoff game in 2005 after he went out early. It was easily one of the most feminine moments in NFL history and, sadly, can't be found on YouTube anywhere. If there is photographic evidence of this, please send it along.

Alexander is already taking on possible suitors for his services. One of those is supposed to be the bastard Patriots, who seem to be the perfect rejuvenation for wayward NFL players who want to make guys like Dick Nichols eat crow.

The Official Website Of Shaun Alexander [Shaun Alexander.org]

The NFL's reigning most valuable player is crediting the power of prayer for possibly healing the cracked bone in his left foot. The foot stopped hurting Tuesday and word spread as Alexander began alerting friends and family. Alexander's brother, Durran, confirmed this today and said his famous brother plans to undergo additional tests today. These stories are rare but not without precedent. Reggie White credited prayer for healing his injured hamstring, allowing him to play for the Green Bay Packers in 1995.

Unfortunately, Jesus isn't in charge of the depth chart: Mike Holmgren is, and he reminded Alexander that, uh, dude, your foot is freaking broken. So Alexander might have Jesus as his co-pilot, but Maurice Morris is still going to be driving.

See, Shaun: It's obviously that you just didn't pray hard enough. What a lousy Christian you are.

Alexander Feels Like Dancing, But Tests, And Holmgren, Say No [Seattle Times]
Jesus Heals Seahawks Running Back [Seattlest]

Otherwise, yeah: That thar Madden Curse has struck again, breaking the foot of Seahawks running back Shaun Alexander. He's out "indefinitely," which is either Jim Edmonds indefinitely — in which case we'll see him, squinting as if in great pain, sometime around 2009 — or Carson Palmer indefinitely, which means he'll be back tomorrow.

We tend to treat curses with the same respect we treat astrology, or voodoo, or mathematics. We will keep screaming "coincidence!" as an army of black cats chases us under a ladder while carrying an open umbrella when it's not raining. Which is why we very much enjoyed this amusing post about Madden's former cover victims. Why, oh why, did they put the World Trade Center on Madden '01? Why didn't somebody stop them?

Madden Curse Responsible For Shaun Alexander Injury, My Wife Leaving Me ... [Pulled My Groin]
Everyone Please Remain Calm [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

But nothing, nothing has ever been worse than the new tune in honor of the Seattle Seahawks, from Seattle's KJR 950-AM. It is set to the tune of "Sweet Home Alabama," it's called "Sweet Shaun Alexander" and you can listen, if you dare, right here. Or, if you're so so masochistic, you can check out the full lyrics after the jump.

A tidbit, though: "Now special teams has got the Josh Brown (woo-hoo-hoo)
And he s been known to kick a ball or two
Lord they always split the uprights
They pick me up when I'm feeling blue, yeah, how 'bout you?"

Enjoy.

"Sweet Shaun Alexander" [KJR-AM]

His wheels keep on turnin'
Carry him home to the endzone
Singin' songs about the big bear
We're in the playoffs once again, and I think we'll win.

Well I've heard Mike Holmgren thinks about him
When he needs to make a first down
Well I hope Mike Holmgren will remember
A Southern man will gain those yards anyhow.

(chorus)
Sweet Shaun Alexander.
Thirty-seven jersey blue.
Sweet Shaun Alexander.
Super Bowl we're going to, yeah. (with Alexander)
(chorus)

In Puget Sound, we love the Seahawks
Make all the noise we could do
Now other teams they do not bother me
The Washington Redskins ... Who?

(chorus)

Now special teams has got the Josh Brown (woo-hoo-hoo)
And he's been known to kick a ball or two
Lord they always split the uprights
They pick me up when I'm feeling blue, yeah, how 'bout you?

(chorus x 2)

• With Jake Plummer's triumph last night, the "Year of the 'Stache" continues. Hey, I think Tom Selleck is missing something. [flickr]

• What happens when Deron Williams and Gilbert Arenas slowdance? Well, for one thing, I laugh my ass off. [J.E. Skeets]

• LSU and USC fans express themselves through billboards. [The Wizard of Odds]

• "Everybody talks about Shaun Alexander like he s Superman. But I don t know. The MVP came out there today and when the Riddles got to poppin , he went to the sideline to get an extra week or whatever." These, and more NFL Playoff quotes. [Sports Frog]

It's difficult to tell if these folks have just wandered over for a chat or are full-fledged members of the 700 Club. At any rate, if Roberston is, as many claim, just out there selling crazy, many pro athletes seem to be buying — by association, at least. Witness (and we love the headlines the best):

• Morgan Ensberg: Three Strikes, You're Saved (this should put a definitive end to those "is he Jewish or not?" questions, by the way)
• Shaun Alexander: Running Back For Jesus
• Jeff Hazuga: Blessed From the Bench

And this, an excerpt from Danny Wuerffel: The Quarterback With a Servant's Heart:

While everyone around him was awed by his talent and promise, Danny realized his need for a Savior and decided to surrender his life completely to Jesus Christ.

Sports [Christian Broadcasting Network]