snakes Page index.xml - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
You Can Cut Off Its Head, But The U.S. Soccer Federation - And The Dudes Running It - Are Still A Bunch Of Snakes
It wasn’t quite a Friday night news dump, but coming in the wake of a pandemic and the world’s first mass-sports suspension, it still made for tidy cover for something slimy to slither out the side door without anyone noticing. Last night, after all North American pro sports leagues were suspending ...
Philadelphia Union Introduce New Mascot, A Snake With Arms And Legs, Which Are Like The Most Important Things A Snake Doesn't Have
In their ninth MLS season, the Philadelphia Union finally (finally) have a mascot. It seems like mere days ago he was a giant egg at the Philadelphia Zoo, which at least indicated that he was not a mammal, or was at least a monotreme. Today, we all got the big news:...
Idiot Snake On The Field Pays Ultimate Price For Love Of Baseball
In the eighth inning of a San Antonio Missions Double-A game Friday night, a true baseball loving snake invaded the outfield and began making his way towards the infield, no doubt in search of the best possible view of the night’s action. Unfortunately, for his curiosity and enthusiasm for America’s...
Animal Watch: Have Animals Escaped Our Control?
You can scarcely turn on the news these days without being confronted by the troubling question: What are animals doing now? ...
N.C. State Baseball Coach Avenges Himself Upon Snake That Bit His Puppy
N.C. State baseball coach Elliott Avent isn’t with his team for this weekend’s series agains Louisville, all because he had to fuck up a snake that bit him and his puppy....
Here Are Some Houston Astros Just Chillin' With An Albino Python
"Broooo, lookit the size of that sucker!" I imagine one of the Astros exclaiming when Sunshine the Albino Python was brought in the room. "Haha, you scared bro?" another one probably quipped. "Nuh uh! If Britney can rock one around her neck, so can I!"...
Man Throws Snake At Tim Hortons Employee After Argument Over Onions
This morning, two customers got into an argument over onions with an employee at a Saskatoon Tim Hortons, and one of the men immediately ended the argument by throwing a snake. Snake coming in hot!...
If You Don't Want To Watch A Guy Fuck A Snake, Here's A Description
A video file by the name of snakefucker.mp4 is making its way around Twitter today. As you can guess by its name, it's a video of a man apparently fucking a snake. If you want to watch the video—which, let's be clear, depicts what is almost certainly an illegal act of animal abuse—it is located here...
There Was A Snake In The Blazers' Locker Room Before Tonight's Game
The Portland Trail Blazers discovered an unpleasant surprise in the AT&T Center locker room before Game 2 against the Spurs....
Why'd It Have To Be Snakes?
Gordon Wright, another lover of classic sports writing, suggested this fun piece of work by Jeff MacGregor. From Sports Illustrated back in 1998, dig "Snakes Alive!"...
Trespassing Snake Brutally Murdered With Pellet Gun By Patrick Willis
And we have the gory photos from the scene thanks to Patrick Willis, who posted them to Facebook. The 49ers linebacker looks pretty pleased with with himself for successfully protecting his home from the scourge of that nonvenomous gopher snake....
Snakebite Victim's Post-Surgery Foot Is Still Horrifying (NSFW)
You shouldn't have looked the first time. We told you not to look, but you looked anyway. You shouldn't look this time, either. Because guess what? When you suffer the most horrific snake bite of all time, that shit is still going to look gross as fuck even after surgery. Disgusting NSFW photo after...
Bear Grylls's Producer Got A Horrific Snake Bite (NSFW)
Professional adventure stager Bear Grylls tweeted this photo earlier today: "our man vs wild producer suffering from a brutal snake bite - fighting the injury with courage." You really don't want to see the rest of this photo. It is not worth your lunch. Just don't click after the jump, and you don'...
This Is Why You Should Have A Snake-Venom Kit With You In The Woods
Big Daddy Lawler is a fellow who hosts an outdoors show every Saturday morning on a radio station in Thomasville, Ala. On his Facebook wall yesterday, Big Daddy posted a story and a photo from a reader named Chad, who on Sunday had been bitten by a rattlesnake. We've cropped the photo above, but you...
In Australia, It's Cricket Vs. The Beer Snake
There's a war going on. On one side, Cricket Australia, the sport's national governing body. On the other side, the elusive beer snake, created by fans stacking thousands of cups through the grandstand. One is the wildly popular national sport of Australia. The other is cricket. And when the two c...
Kobe Bryant Hisses Like A Snake On The Court, According To Jordan Crawford
Yesterday's installment of Dan Le Batard's ESPN podcast featured a segment in which Le Batard is joined by Wizards guard Jordan Crawford. The ensuing conversation isn't anything special, save for this anecdote about Crawford's experience matching up against Kobe Bryant (transcription courtesy of DC...
The PGA Tour Reminds Us Yet Again That South Carolina Is A Deathswamp
This video, of a big-ass alligator eating a big-ass snake, comes from yesterday's round one action in the PGA Championship, at Kiawah Island. NBD. Happens all the time. Back in April at the Heritage Classic in Hilton Head, the gators were actually threatening the caddies. Gator Golf is not nearly ...
Poor Dumb Snake Eats Golf Balls Thinking They're Eggs
It's almost cruel, what an Australian farmer did: he put golf balls in his chickens' nests to encourage them to lay eggs. Does that work? Well, it fooled a coastal carpet python, who swallowed two of them....
This Is What Happens When The Commonwealth Games Are Attacked By Monkeys And Snakes
Newspaper ledes you'll hopefully never see in America: "Fierce langur monkeys and snake charmers have been deployed at several Commonwealth Games venues across New Delhi to try to protect athletes and delegates from simian and reptile attack." [NZH](ViaTom Kolak)...