Olympics Brand Police Not Happy About Athletes Humping With…

As we've seen again and again (and again), the London Organising Committee of the Olympic and Paralympic Games (LOCOG) protects Olympic sponsors with the ferocity of a mother bear protecting its cubs. That extends to condoms: when Australian BMXer Caroline Buchanan tweeted this picture of "a bucket of unauthorized… » 8/09/12 4:57pm 8/09/12 4:57pm

Break Out Your Fashionable Drinking Pants

Deadspin readers in New York City who like beer, rooftops, bloggers and German things are encouraged to attend a truly magical New Yorkish evening at Gawker HQ's official rooftop in a model-infested section of SoHo. The event is called "Gawktoberfest" ( personally, I prefer "Guten-Blog", but I have no say in such… » 10/14/08 5:50pm 10/14/08 5:50pm

It's A Sad Day For Obscure Movies You Don't Care About

I know I've been writing a lot this week, and I swear, my actual job really does keep me plenty busy, but Daulerio informed me of an impending change at Deadspin that I had to weigh in on. In about 15 minutes, Gawker Media is introducing automated, ad-produced sponsors posts. That means: No more movie quotes, ever… » 10/03/08 12:43pm 10/03/08 12:43pm

I'm The Type Of Guy That Likes To Roam Around

I don't blame you. When I was your age, I was knockin' 'em off left and right; but I never did it with nobody's daughter. You should have given her an ankle bracelet and stuck to jerkin' off! If you're fearful of the Galasso brothers and the Ducky Boys, then you're ready to be a Deadspin advertiser. Go here » 9/12/08 3:00pm 9/12/08 3:00pm to find…

You know she has that Scooby-Doo tongue.

You see I don't, I don't work with any exact boundaries of the law because I wasn't consulted when the god damn laws were made. No, instead nameless, faceless politicians, the so called protectors of the moral majority decide what is right and what is wrong. I mean come on. I govern my life around my own personal code… » 8/29/08 3:00pm 8/29/08 3:00pm

Hey, hey. Yeah you, get up. What are you retarded...

You're gonna wish you never fucking got up this fucking morning asshole, because my boyfriend's gonna fuck you up! And then after that while he's fucking up your fucking gay uncle over there I'm gonna fucking cut off your cock and mail it to your mother, you fucking faggot bitch! You gaylord fucking bitch! How do you… » 8/22/08 3:15pm 8/22/08 3:15pm

Good Lord - I've heard about this - cat juggling! Stop! Stop! Stop it!…

And that's it and that's the only thing I need, is this. I don't need this or this. Just this ashtray. And this paddle game, the ashtray and the paddle game and that's all I need. And this remote control. The ashtray, the paddle game, and the remote control, and that's all I need. And these matches. The ashtray, and… » 8/15/08 3:00pm 8/15/08 3:00pm

Spend 10 Minutes Of Your Life Clicking Boxes And You Will Possibly Earn…

It's Thursday. The day is almost over. Why not spend the rest of your afternoon sharing your personal information for the chance at winning a $300 Visa gift card? Please? Just fill out this little survey » 8/14/08 3:45pm 8/14/08 3:45pm and you're entered. (No pun intended.) Yes, . Now, get typing. Zorbolt the Gawker advertising robot would like to…

I'm Sorry I Put Window Pane In Mel's Quail

You got a lot of nerve. You come in here, you lick my wife's armpit. You know... I'm going to have that image in my head for the rest of my life with your tongue in there. If you're seeing colors you don't want to see or hearing music coming from the table, then you're ready to become a Deadspin advertiser. Here are… » 8/08/08 4:05pm 8/08/08 4:05pm

You Have The Voice Of An angel. I Mean, It's Like Fergie Meets Jesus.

Brennan Huff: » 8/01/08 3:00pm 8/01/08 3:00pm This house is a fucking prison! On Planet Bullshit! In the galaxy of This Sucks Camel Dicks! If you agree with these sentiments then because you're clearly ready to be a Deadspin advertiser. This week's Boats 'n Ho's: • Coors Light •Crackle.com •AOL Fanhouse •Eve Online • Puma •T-Mobile • Unscrew America

We'll Camp In The Wilderness And In The Morning We'll Breakfast On Its…

Georgie: » 7/25/08 3:30pm 7/25/08 3:30pm Does everything you touch turn to shit? Does this happen to you every time? [weeping] No wonder everybody calls me "Fuck-Head." Georgie: It's a name that's going to stick. I realize that. "Fuck-Head" is gonna ride you to your grave. I already said so, I agreed with you in advance. If you were so zonked…