Deadspin: Stanford Tree

Of Monday Hangovers, Booty Calls, And The Biggest Upset In College Football History

rickchand — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 11:10:13 EDT

To put Stanford's win over USC into the proper perspective this morning, you should know that the Stanford Tree woke up with a raging hangover, empty tequila bottles strewn about his apartment and a pair of panties dangling from his upper branches. OK, that just means it's Monday. For real perspective, how about this e-mail I received yesterday from a Stanford grad:

"I keep thinking I should be conflicted over all of this, given that Stanford's victory allows Cal to get to No. 2 (almost No. 1 if not for LSU's big comeback)."

Yep, the 24-23 win at USC was so stunning, Cardinal supporters are worried about how it affects their arch-rival. God, they don't even know how to properly celebrate. Having grown up in the Bay Area, this doesn't surprise me at all. Unlike Texas or Oklahoma, where football is religion and one wrong word can get your scrotum ripped, we are by comparison a sleepy backwater. In the great department store of college football, we are the casual wear department.

But that doesn't make Saturday's result any less significant. Even if no one else is saying it, can I call this what it is? The biggest upset in college football history. USC opened as a 41-point favorite, and by game time the line was at 39-40. If the point spead is the standard, then this beats the runnerup, Oregon State (+36) over Washington, 21-20, in 1986. Other fun facts:

• Going into the game, Stanford was 2-14 since the start of last season and had been outscored 72-3 in the previous six quarters.
• It was the first start for quarterback Tavita Pritchard, who had thrown three passes in college.
• Stanford's defense was allowing 47 points per game in Pac-10 play.
• The Cardinal trailed 23-14 in the fourth quarter.

But for the Stanford-didn't-win-it-USC-lost-it crowd, well, things like this just don't happen without being part of some bigger picture. The fact that Stanford was even in a position to win it at the end means that this program has turned some sort of corner. The Cardinal played harder, made the the big plays when they counted and may have had a bit of divine assistance when Mark Bradford pulled down Pritchard's pass in the left corner of the end zone for the winning TD. This caused all sorts of confusion among the Versus announcers, by the way: One of whom boldly predicted — after the TD catch had tied it — that Stanford would go for the one-point conversion instead of two.

It's kind of a neat moment, too, for Jim Harbaugh, who played high school football across the street from Stanford — at Palo Alto High — before becoming the quarterback at Michigan (after Stanford admissions had turned him down). While at Paly, Harbaugh was so famous for locking his keys in his car during football season that teammates built him a jimmy device in shop class so that they wouldn't have to continually drive him home. It's that singularity of purpose that leads one to believe that he just may have a future in this football business.

On the other hand, you have John David Booty, who the same night his team lost in the biggest upset in college history, was seen doing shooters at Les Deux, an LA nightclub. It could be said that he was drowning his sorrows; if by that you meant "being draped by blondes."

Actually I'm just relieved that the Stanford band didn't march onto the field prematurely and ruin this one. That very easily could have happened.

Biggest Upset In College Football History? [Democratic Underground]
LA Nightclub Gets Booty Shots After Trojan Loss [SportsbyBrooks]
Stanford Upset Of USC Even Shocks Commentators [SportsbyBrooks]
Stanford Shocker [YouTube]

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

rickchand — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:45:42 EDT

It's only a matter of time before the Stanford Tree is apprehended following a high-speed vehicle chase, with a hatchet and a bottle of PineSol found in the back seat of its SUV. Until then, here are the facts as we know them: The NCAA on Friday sanctioned the Stanford mascot, and fined the university an undisclosed amount, for a series of incidents that included drunken cavorting at the NCAA Women's Basketball Tournament in March (just look at the accompanying photo; that is one shit-faced tree). The Tree is banned from the tournament next year, as the university mulls its future as the Stanford Band's official mascot.

The Tree (played by junior Tommy Leep), however, would not be hauled off without a departing salvo:

"I thought this was all settled back in March," Leep said Friday night. "I sort of look at the NCAA like an ex-girlfriend trying to come and take the boom box back or something."

Will Stanford dump its tree mascot? If so, what will replace it? A bush? The letter S? A squirrel? What, we ask? What?

Tree Ruled Over The Top [SFGate]
The Dangerous Rebel With The Fresh Pine Scent [Deadspin]
Can One Costumed Beer Keg Mascot Make A Difference? Yes, He Can. [Deadspin]

Can One Costumed Beer Keg Mascot Make A Difference? Yes, He Can

Rick Chandler — Wed, 26 Apr 2006 13:15:43 EDT

Yes, because we're your trusted source for mascot news, we bring you Eight Mascots That Need To Die, from Armchair GM (via Bob Reno's BadJocks). Among the unfortunate winners are obvious choices, such as Screech the Hyperactive Fowl from the Washington Nationals, and the sad, besotted Stanford Tree. But we had never even heard of Keggy the Keg from Dartmouth (pictured), and who could spend two minutes in a room with Nebraska's Lil' Red and a nail gun and not end up puncturing it in horrible ways? Totally impossible.

Actually, students at Dartmouth are a little pissed that Keggy was named to the list, as they see him as a sign of protest against "The man." Take a look at the posts in the site's comments section, one of which is partially excerpted here:

What's important about Keggy is not so much that he's a giant beer or that he filled the void of a humanoid mascot at football games, it's that he represented a giant "$%#! you!" to the Dartmouth administration. Kegs are banned at Dartmouth unless you register them way in advance. The administration that took our kegs and tried to cut the entire swim team over Thanksgiving break tried to throw us a bone by letting us choose the next mascot, and Keggy turned the whole shabang into a giant shitburger. Keggy kicks ass, even if he comes off a little dorky as an official Ivy League mascot.

Also, no mascot list could be complete without this:

St. Louis College of Pharmacy's mascot is a Eutectic. Just so you know, this is not actually a creature, simply a chemical process.

Sad, really.

Eight Mascots That Need To Die [Armchair GM]

If a Tree Falls Down Drunk in the Bleachers, Does It Make a Sound?

Leitch — Thu, 16 Feb 2006 14:10:42 EST

Fantastic. According to a story first run in the San Jose Mercury News, the Stanford University band's famous tree mascot was fired for being completely shit-faced during last week's Cal/Stanford basketball game. Erin Lashnits, who served as the rowdy tree blew a .157 BAC during the game,the story said. It's unclear how they went about finding this out—maybe she went all Shooter and ran out on to the court—but it is clear that even though it may be a dent in her social life, it won't be for her athletic elgibility as a member of Stanford's swim team, according to band spokesman Sam Urmy. Plus, Urmy added that the university had previously placed the band on "alcohol suspension," which requires a zero-tolerance policy toward drunkenness. So Lashnits had to go. And finally, to put a neat little cap on the story, Urmy said this:

"We don't want to risk our core mission of rocking out and bringing funk to the funkless."

Yes. Yes he did.

Stanford Tree Fired For Alleged Drunkenness [SF Gate]