Glazer and his family also own Manchester United, which puts them in controlling possession of two billion-dollar sports properties. (Forbes values the Bucs at $1.085 billion.) Yet, somehow they make no money. Man U allegedly carries close to $2 billion in debt and the Bucs are currently a ridiculous $30 million under the NFL salary cap. So when there's no more players left to dump, you just have to dump the whole team.

Good luck finding a buyer IN THIS ECONOMY, though. I hear Rush Limbaugh might have some cash lying around.

NFL's Buccaneers For Sale - Terrible Team Yours For ~$1 Billion [Business Insider]
Tatum Bell: Tuskers can beat the Bucs [Tampa Bay.com]

Jagodzinski has now been fired from two jobs in nine months, neither one of which was the gig he wanted in the first place. As you may or may not recall, Jags was head coach at Boston College, who a put a clause in his contract saying he couldn't interview for another job. So he interviewed with the New York Jets anyway, got fired from B.C. and then didn't get the Jets job. Oops.

Apparently, he latched on to the Raheem Morris Era (who is 13 years younger than J.J., by the way) in Tampa and that didn't work out so well either. Adam Scheffter said on SportsCenter that there was some dispute between Jeff Jags and quarterbacks coach Greg Olson over who should be starting behind center. Now Olson has his job, so we know who won that battle.

And Jiggsy is not even the first offensive coordinator to get bounced this preseason. The Chiefs dumped Chan Gailey on Monday. I don't want to tell these teams how to raise their assistant coaches, but if you don't give them the chance to fail on their own then they'll never learn anything.

Buccaneers fire offensive coordinator Jeff Jagodzinski [Tampa Bay.com]

Talib is probably best known for getting in a fight at the NFL Rookie Symposium—which is where you're supposed to learn not to fight your own teammates—and in a separate incident, swinging his helmet like a club and hitting another teammate in the head. This time, he may or may not have punched a cab driver, so perhaps he's stopped hurting people he knows. Improvement!

[TBO/PFT]

If you like the complete organizational implosion of professional sports teams, you will love your 2009 Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Nothing says "comeback year" like bringing back the uniforms you banned more than a dozen years ago because they represented 20 years of uninterrupted, embarrassing failure (and also because they were breathtakingly ugly)!

Ok, let's get to the gay jokes.

"People thought we were trying to lock our history away in a closet,'' said Bucs co-chairman Ed Glazer.

This year, Bucs history comes out of the closet! On November 8, at least. The rest of the year they will remain ashamed of their history. (But not too ashamed to sell "Florida Orange" throwback unis, obviously.)

Last Friday, Stroud casually mentioned that the Buccaneers might be"interested" in possibly signing possibly washed up wide receiver Marvin Harrison. Tampa fans were obviously all ... um ... atwitter over this happy information and a few places even re-reported this story as an actual bonafide thing. Big mistake. Blogger Joe Bucs Fan (not to be confused with Joe Buck fans) was a little annoyed that Stroud had to come back on his Twitter to explain the difference between real news and shit that he just makes up on the internet.

"People, if I tweet something bout Marvin Harrison it's agent-driven speculation. If there's news, I'll post it on Tampabay.com. K? Sheesh 5:44 AM May 30th from web

Yeah, come on guys. Can't you tell when a reporter is talking about actual legitimate news and when he's really just helping an agent drum up non-existent buzz about a client? It's not like 85% of all NFL coverage is unfounded speculation about player personnel moves. Next time, just wait until Chris Mortensen writes something on his Facebook wall. That's when you know it's a big scoop.

Rick Stroud Slaps Bucs Fans, Media [Joe Bucs Fan]
Rick Stroud (NFLSTROUD) [Twitter]

From Mrs. Hovan:

chris took that picture with those girls when we stepped out of our private party area to get a water and beer! anyhow… we are happily married, kids are great, the article quote still stand and thanks again for calling the asshole who wrote that lie out! chris and jaimi

And there you go. Is Mrs. Hovan's email real? Who knows. We could be here for days. The Deleted Scenes rabbit hole is dark and deep.

Straight From The Hovan's Mouth [Bucstats.com]

Gruden starts off by describing how he misses the game (it's only been four weeks!), hints that his next job might be in the college ranks, then goes kind of fanboy on the subject of Tebow:

"No question. The hard part is, you have to isolate the option. That's why Tim Tebow is so interesting to me. He's like Brandon Jacobs playing quarterback. He's 250 pounds. He's the strongest human being who's ever played the position. Ever. He will kick the living [expletive] out of a defensive lineman. He'll fight anybody. He is rare. Tebow is the kind of guy who could revolutionize the game. He's the 'wildcat' who can throw. Most of the teams that have the wildcat back there, it's Ronnie Brown, it's Jerious Norwood, it's whoever you want to say it is. This guy here is 250 pounds of concrete cyanide, man. And he can throw. He throws well enough at any level to play quarterback."

But Gruden wasn't done.

When he was a high school senior, they played Armwood in the state championship game. I have tape. He has an 80-yard touchdown run that put them in the lead. When it flipped around, and Armwood had the ball, what position do you think Tebow was playing? He was playing nose guard - and he disrupted about 10 plays. This guy is totally different. He's got Rich Gannon, Drew Brees, that kind of makeup as a team guy. What he said after the Ole Miss game, I said, 'That's my favorite football player I've ever seen in my whole life.' I said, 'I want Florida to win every game that kid plays from now on.'"

I wonder if the Brett Favre shrine in Peter King's home is bigger than Gruden's backyard Tim Tebow topiary hedge?

Jon Gruden Talks About Life After The Bucs — And Tim Tebow [Sun-Sentinel]

According to Pro Football Talk, Rice hopped on the NFL Sirius radio program Movin’ The Chains to let it be known that Jon Gruden's a heartless tyrant who treats all his players like disposable heroes.

Back to the front:

"You look at what he did when Chris [Simms] damn near died on the field he wanted to release him right when he got injured. I get hurt, my shoulder's torn off the bone. This dude releases me. You know what I mean? I'm your guy. The list goes on. Keenan McCardell, that situation was a debacle. Keyshawn Johnson, another situation [that] was a debacle. Joey Galloway, which was his man, was in the dog house all year because he got injured, broke his ankle or whatever. Brad Johnson, that situation was bad. Brings Jeff Garcia in here,
oh, he's going to change things. I helped recruit him [and he] released me, kept Jeff and then put him in the dog house. Gets rid of Brian Greise, brings him, starts a controversy. It was chaotic. I'm giving you facts."

And then Rice gave opinions.

"How I feel personally? I could tell you that, too. I think he's a scumbag," Rice said. "I think he's a scumbag personally. That's when he's telling you one thing and… You know what he told me? 'Simeon you'll be here in the next five years.' I got injured [and] this man's never said one word to me. I won a Super Bowl for you. I got 13 sacks, 12, 15 every year for you. I balled. I got injured [and] you let me go like it was nothing."

Well, to be fair, Gruden wasn't the only one to let Simeon go. After he was released by the Bucs, Rice latched on to Denver for a little while and then asked to be released due to lack of playing time, then hooked up with the Colts. He's planning a "comeback" this season as a pass-rush specialist, but he's just an empty shell.

Simeon Rice Calls Jon Gruden A Scumbag [PFT]

But seriously, how is Herm Edwards the only coach to not be fired this offseason? And he has a brand-new general manager, no less. I can only assume that Herm is an FBI plant, maintaining his position solely to gather intel on the drug trafficking scene in Kansas City. And that the Chiefs are in cahoots with the feds. And that's truly the least ridiculous reason I can fathom for that man still having a job.

As soon as this man—whom we'll call Al Davis Jr.—got home on Sunday night, he fired off a strongly worded email to the NFL, the Buccaneers, the Tampa Sports Authority, and our sister site Consumerist, who posted the full email on their site. The gist—a Raiders fan from New Jersey was non-belligerently enjoying the final regular season game in Tampa, when he was rudely and unfairly ejected simply for applauding Oakland's first touchdown.

I feel like I was personally singled out due to my team affiliation, and this was totally unwarranted. I was not intoxicated or found to be in possession of any illegal substances. I was not being verbally or physically abusive to any other fans or players. There were no requests to adjust my behavior prior to this either, which was not causing an issue as multiple witnesses can attest to.

Sounds pretty bad. Well, Al Jr. got a response from the Tampa Sports Authority and he sent it to us, along with his response to their response.

We are sorry that you did not have the experience that you expected to have here at Raymond James Stadium during the Raiders game. We seek to offer each fan a positive experience.

Your inquiry, however, cannot be addressed by our staff due to your ejection by the Tampa Police Department. The TPD records indicate that you were intoxicated and caused a disturbance by cussing and instigating fights, thus your questions must be directed to them, now. Please call *** at ********* and he will respond to your concerns".

So now it's he said, he said. (And cussing! In front of children, no doubt.) So what did he say ... ?

So lets assume that I was in fact intoxicated and causing a disturbance by cursing and instigating fights. I feel like the worst decision would have been to release me outside of the stadium. I would hope that individuals acting in the manner described above were either arrested or detained until they were settled down. Tossing a drunk person trying to start fights back out into the public doesn't sound like a great idea to me.

Like i said before though, I wasn't drunk. I did have a couple beers outside of the stadium, but I wasn't drinking inside the stadium. I was not breathalyzed or given a field sobriety test by the officers, so I'm not sure how they made that determination.

I'll admit I probably cursed at some point in the first quarter and a half of the game. I wasn't directing it at any fans, but I'm sure a "F*uck yeah!" as the Raiders forced another punt popped out at some point. I would have felt it was totally reasonable for someone from the Tampa Bay staff to pull me out my seat, and ask me to adjust my language. [Emphasis added]

Ahhhh ... so now the story is changing a bit. Maybe he did have a couple of beers and maybe a "fuck yeah" or ten?

It would make no sense for me to instigate fights. I was a stand-alone Raider fan with two Buccaneer friends and a neutral friend with me in what I think may have been a Tampa Bay season ticket holder section. I cannot imagine anything dumber than trying to pick a fight when I was completely surrounded by Bucs fans. After the first 3 minutes of the game, I didn't speak to a single Bucs fan, but was thrown out immediately after the Raiders first scored with 10 minutes left in the 2nd quarter.

If I may play devil's advocate: One might argue that being a Raider's fan makes no sense, but we all know that community's legendary reputation for decorum and restraint. Also, the above picture was included in the latest email, apparently as some sort of proof of this person's soundness of judgment.

I don't know if this was a joke or not either, but I was initially let out of the cell and after they typed some info into a computer, they asked if I was aware of any outstanding immigration violations. They put me back int the cell and then let me out a few minutes later and asked if I had ever gone by the names "Esteban" or "Emmanuel". Once I assured them I hadn't they took me out of the stadium, but I felt like that was just a very weird exchange.

The pic I attached is from a tailgating group who let my friends and me join them before the game. It seems like I was able to get along pretty well with a group of hardcore Bucs fans. Still haven't heard anything from the NFL or the Bucs.

So let's examine the evidence again:

• A Raider's fan
• From New Jersey
• Wearing an innertube
• Probably swearing
• Possibly using an alias
• Definitely drinking Natural Ice

I'm starting to think Al Jr. got off easy.

Tampa Bay Handcuffs And Ejects You For Rooting For The Opposing Football Team [Consumerist]

From the lawsuit petition:

Petition claiming plaintiff was assaulted by defendants Davis and Bennett, who play for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, while a patron at defendant IHOP. Specifically, Davis became drunk and belligerent, addressed two female patrons as "sluts" and "whores," and yelled "where's my motherfucking food?" Defendant Bennett then appeared in the parking lot and brandished a handgun to plaintiff and asked "is there a problem?"

Apparently Davis, an offensive tackle who now plays for the Rams and is 6-foot-4, 322 pounds, called Bennett as backup to take on the random breakfast stranger. Bennett is a running back who is now with the Chargers.

The plaintiff is also suing IHOP, claiming that none of their employees interceded during the altercation. What? The cook didn't just whip off his paper hat and yell "Grab your spatula, Dolores, we're gonna kick some NFL ass!"

(Thanks to Enthused_But_Fired and his underscores of justice for this tip).

Man Says 2 NFL Players Beat Him Up [Courthouse News Service]

I'm not 100% positive, but it sounds like Mike Tirico might have jizzed in his pants after this.

Video courtesy of Fandome.

Yet, here he is, once again, shirtless and scowling, trying to keep the Bucs atop the NFC Winter Vacation division. But to do so, he'll have to get past the Carolina Panthers and their frisky defense and suddenly unstoppable DeAngelo Williams. This will be one of the better MNF games of the year, as you have two first place teams, division rivals, all sorts of playoff implications and, of course, Jeff Garcia's wily quarterbacking skills.

******

TONIGHT: Bucs/Panthers on Monday Night Football.

Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Please support Kissing Suzy Kolber and their noble, angry cause.

It's not like this Peanuts special, first shown in 1965, isn't widely available on DVD, or again later this month on television. But this is the first airing of it this holiday season, which is a cherished tradition for a lot of people. Curling up with your family in front of a roaring log fire to watch Josh Bidwell punt out of his own end zone just isn't the same.

Actually we know what happens in the Peanuts special: Round-headed boy picks out spindly tree, ineptly directs Christmas play, is mocked by own dog; not unlike the way things were run with the Lions under Millen. The outcome of Monday night's game is less certain, as the two 9-3 teams battle for sole possession of first place in the NFC South (be sure to look for Julius Pepper's heartwarming reading of the Gospel of Luke, verses 8 through 14).

Fun fact: A Charlie Brown Christmas aired annually on CBS from 1965 through 2000; more consecutive showings than any special or movie in TV history. In 2001 the rights were acquired by ABC, where it has been since, showing twice a year.

Graphic: Associated Press

Ch. 28 Picks Up Buccaneers Game Monday, Pre-Empting Charlie Brown Christmas And Boston Legal Finale [Tampa Bay Online]

Poor Lions Fan Kicked off The Bus [Fandome]

With the economy in a tailspin and Congress ignoring the auto industry's bailout pleas, it seems only fitting that this is the year that the Lions make their most serious push toward NFL history. But are they bad enough to attain the league record for losses? Do Lions fans dare to dream that big? Yes they do.

Is Detroit the worst team ever? Florida residents who were around in the mid-1970s say no way. Meet the 1976 Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

Game 10 vs. the Jets: Lou Holtz's team is 2-7 but still manages to humiliate the Bucs. It is New York's first shutout since the Jets played at the Polo Grounds in 1963. "If this keeps up, I'm going to have to buy all of them beards and dark glasses so nobody will recognize them," McKay says. Bucs lose 34-0.

Game 14 vs. the Patriots: The season ends with New England calling timeout with six seconds remaining so Steve Grogan can take it in from the 1 to set an NFL record for rushing TDs for a quarterback. Making things just a little worse, the Patriots let linebacker Steve Zabel kick the extra point. The Bucs lose 31-14 and make history. They are 0-14.

Sorry Lions. The '76 Buccaneers Are The Epitome Of Futility [St. Petersburg Times]
Yes We Can Lions; 0-16 [World Of Isaac]

"I wanted to honor Tryson's name," Bryant said. "I didn't think it was very fair for his life to end so short. This is the best way, I believe that I could get out and honor him. I miss him. I wish he was here. But he was here with me. He helped out....

"I didn't want to have a bad game today," Bryant said. "I wanted to be focused to lift Tryson up, to put him in the spotlight. I was going to go 3-for-3 today. It didn't matter. I wasn't going to let anything screw up the day when I had the opportunity to acknowledge him again."

Here's a thought — what would have happened if Bryant missed those three field goals? Would it have been less heroic or an easy excuse for a poor performance? And would Bryant have been as willing to talk about it post-game? But was it even in Jon Gruden's best interest to use Bryant under those circumstances. Placekickers are wired differently than other NFL players and getting in the proper mindset is often what stands between success and unemployment. There was an emergency back-up plan in place if Bryant didn't want to kick. It's equally gutsy of Gruden to go with Bryant given those circumstances — both personally and professionally.

Thankfully, it worked out.

Matt Bryant's strength goes beyond the game [ESPN]
A Father's Heavy Heart [Tampa Tribune]