Football players telling you what they like in a woman, to be specific. Surprisingly, it takes more than knowing which hotel they're staying in to have a chance with these hopeless romantics.

Some highlights:

Cosmo: What's a dating pet peeve you have?
Kerry Rhodes: "A pet peeve of mine is when a woman acts like she's not as hungry as she really is and all she orders is a salad. I'm like, 'Baby, please eat!'"

Cosmo: What's something a woman might say that would turn you off?
Matt Cassel: "I had garlic for lunch."

Cosmo: What's something a woman might say that you'd like to hear?
David Anderson: "'You don't have to pay for that.' Kidding. I would always be a gentleman and take care of the bill, of course...but really, it's always nice to hear a woman say, 'Thank you.' Those two words go a long way."

Cosmo: What's a piece of dating advice you wish women knew?
Wes Welker: "Call me so you know where I am, follow me to see if I'm doing what I say I'm doing, hire a private investigator...but whatever you do, do not snoop through my e-mail or cell phone!

Cosmo: What's something a woman can do on a first date to guarantee a second one?
Terrell Owens: "Good communication is the key to keeping my interest. Every man notices a woman's looks first, but a beautiful mind and great conversation is what intrigues me."

To sum up: Kerry Rhodes likes 'em thick, Matt Cassel is a jackass, David Anderson is just happy the media's talking to him, Wes Welker is a weirdo, and Terrell Owens is a liar.

Exclusive! Dating Tips from Sexy NFL Stars [Cosmopolitan]

•Rodney Harrison answers T.O.'s "you took steroids" with "at least I won a championship." Guys, guys, let's not fight. Can't we all agree that Harrison was on a championship team because he took steroids?

•A judge refused to dismiss the lawsuit against Ben Roethlisberger, probably because, like us, he's enjoying the assorted insane details about the plaintiff that seem to emerge fortnightly.

•The good: the Phillies clinch the NL East, calling on Brad Lidge to finish the ninth. With two outs already on the board. And a seven run lead. Yup, this ship looks seaworthy heading into October.

•The bad: Jamie Moyer is done for the year after suffering three torn tendons. He's still under contract for next year for $8 million, but who could have seen this coming when they gave a 46-year-old a multi-year deal?

•Michael Vick signs an endorsement deal with Nike, shocking the country. Not because of the dog thing, we're over that. We're shocked because Vick has done fuck-all for his team, and looks to maintain that pace. (UPDATE: "Lies!" says Nike.)

•Stafon Johnson is resting after surgery, and even thanked fans for their support on his Twitter. Oh good, who needs intact vocal chords when you've got Twitter?

•Mats Sundin calls it a 20-year-career. Normally this is where I'd throw in a joke, but come on hockey fans, I wrote two posts for you tonight. Two! That should be enough for you this week.

•Front row seat? Check. Glove, even though you're too old for that? Check. Shit-eating grin? Check. Yes, the Happy Youngster caught another HR ball, this time off the bat of Prince Fielder.

•I will make this a meme if it kills me. Keeping the spirit alive, here's an acoustic cover of Colby Rasmus Fire Burning In The Outfield:

Rather than hoot and holler and tear the locker room apart after Monday night's loss to New England, T.O. huddled silently in his locker, declining to speak with reporters. Surly as he was, many people appreciated T.O.'s coyness. Jerry Sullivan, a columnist hungry for inflammatory sound bites, was not one of those people.

Sullivan, who apparently knows nothing about Terrell Owens, became indignant when T.O. failed to inspire tearful Bills with "comforting words" or uplifting rhetoric or something. Seriously.

When the Bills signed Terrell Owens, we were told he would be a leader for a young team, a better teammate than we realized, a star who would bring some straight talk and swagger to the locker room.

So I had looked forward to hearing T.O. speak after his first real game as a Bill. And after Monday night's 25-24 loss to the Patriots, a lot of the media were eager to hear what the iconic receiver would say, what comforting words he would offer to his team and fans.

The answer was nothing. Owens pulled the old silent act after Buffalo blew a late 11-point lead in New England. He took a pass. The kind you can't drop.

"You're wasting your time," Owens told a horde of reporters at his locker. "I have nothing to say."

Sullivan goes on to speculate as to why T.O. took a pass. The kind you can't drop:

Perhaps T.O. concluded it wasn't in his self-interest to speak. Maybe he had to clear it with those two female advisers, to make certain it didn't compromise his well-crafted public image.

We could only guess how Owens felt about the painful loss, or his own meager contributions to the offense. Maybe he was afraid he might be goaded into griping about the fact that only four balls were thrown in his direction.

Still, it was weak. Owens has sold himself as a personality, a guy who commands people's attention. He got a key to the city. He has his own reality TV show. The reality after Monday's game was that he lacked the decency to stand and face the music after a tough loss.

[...]

They say Owens is a great teammate. But once the real games began, T.O. wasn't all about the team. He was, as we'd been warned, all about himself.

So T.O — who apparently has a "well-crafted public image" as a good sport that no one but Sullivan has seen — is already a malcontent because he didn't mumble a few clichés to the media. Someone here is certainly all about himself, only it's not Owens.

Sullivan: As a leader, T.O. dropped the ball [The Buffalo News]

Sports Business Journal takes a look at some of the other new shows in the pipeline, like "Shaq Vs.", and wonders why they're being made in the first place. The T.O. Show got more buzz than just about any mid-summer replacement could get and it wound up tied with a re-run of "Fresh Prince" for the 798th-highest-rated cable show of the week. Man, I would hate to see what 799 was.

These shows get some of the worst ratings imaginable and critics won't even be bothered to tell you how terrible they are. (The only one that seems to get any traction at all is "Hard Knocks.") Yet, networks executives can't wait to make more, because they are incredibly cheap to produce and don't require turning no-talent hairdos like Spencer and Heidi into celebrities. At least Warren Sapp used to be able to tackle people.

In other words, you get what you pay for and ... say it with me ... "in this economy" what else can you expect? But why do sports reality shows do so poorly in the first place. They appear to have a ready-made audience of devoted, talkative, spend-happy observers? (i.e., you guys.) Maybe it's because sports fans already have a huge slate of reality shows on their TV watching schedule. It's called "sports."

Low cost, not ratings power, keeps sports reality pipeline full [Sports Business Journal]

This week began with Terrell Owens getting into a limo and bailing on the whole enterprise. This entire competition took maybe two weeks of actual real world time to film in the Bahamas, but apparently Owens couldn't fit that into his schedule, jetting off to Bills training camp halfway through production. Since he's been completely dogging it the entire time—and was actually kicked off once already—I guess he just assumed that he wouldn't be there that long. Plus, he's got to be sick of his partner Joanna Krupa, who is now off the show through no fault of her own. (Besides being incredibly annoying.)

So now that any possibility of controversy or drama (read: good television) has been eliminated, we can go on with the charade.

Game One of tonight's episode was a relay foot race, which they've already done before and is incredibly boring to watch. The athletic people did well, the non-athletic people (Jeff Kent) didn't. The end. Bode Miller and Paige Hemmis, realizing that they weren't going to win the foot race, tanked, hoping to save their energy for the next event. Unbeknownst to them, the next event was bowling, a sport scientifically designed for lazy people. Backfire?

Personally, I think they should just bring back Celebrity Bowling. Check out that list of celebrities. We're talking reasonably big time people here. (For the 1970s, that is.) Michael Douglas was on that show and this was back when he was still kind of edgy. OK, he was never edgy, but why can't we can't get legitimate TV stars with lots of time on their hands to participate in this kind of crap more often? Like Kiefer Sutherland wouldn't just OWN the obstacle course?

Anyway, the bowling lane was built over a swimming pool, yet somehow the game was not designed to force anyone to fall in and get wet, which just boggles the mind. Lisa Leslie/Baywatch Guy and Jeff Kent/Doritos Girl ended up in the final obstacle course run, just like last week, and Jeff and Ali lost, just like last week. (They were let back in, because T.O. quit.) So we're right back where we started and ABC wasted 59 minutes of perfectly good airtime.

Then, only then, underneath the final credits, does Kristi Leskinen appear in a bikini for the first time all series. Do they deliberately not want ratings? Why isn't she on water slides the entire episode? Sheesh.

Still better than the All-Star Game I think. I feel asleep during that.

The Superstars [ABC]

Joanna Krupa and Terrell Owens' Team Ego failed miserably on the first week of The Superstars, but Week Two began with the announcement that Jennifer Capriati had suffered a mysterious injury and would not be continuing. The solution? Bring back T.O.'s team! Oh, and look ... this week's events just happen to be sprinting and jumping. Do you think an NFL wide receiver might be good at that?

The first half-hour of the show involved the always riveting "running in a straight line competition," in which Owens destroyed the competition. Even when half-assing it—and with maybe the slowest possible partner—he cruised to victory. And when he did decide to turn it on, his speed is actually kind of impressive. Julio Iglesias Jr. didn't stand a chance!

At least the event did provide the first legit injury of the competition. Dan Cor-tay-zay blew out his hammy running across a beach. Cortese is down! Cortese is down! He even went to a awesome Bahamas hospital. This shit is for reals, yo. (Capriati's old partner, David Charvet, took his place.)

The next event was a water long jump. Couldn't the producers have found an event that played more to Terrell's strengths, like "who can run the best post route" or "crying at press conferences"? Owens actually botched his jump, but still managed to advance thanks to his showing is the sprint. Iglesias was actually impressive thanks to some world class jumper's form (before having the greatest wipeout) and Bode Miller is shaping up to be the most dangerous of the athletes. Of course, he's a skier, so the oxygen depletion may catch up to him at some point. Oh, and Jeff Kent took his shirt off, which was not good for anyone.

Ironically (but not really), the worst jumper of all is the basketball player. The competition isn't really designed for retired 6'10" dudes with bad knees and Robert Horry's age is showing. Plus, he's paired with Estella Warren who is playing way above her fighting weight and is probably the least athletic celebrity in the bunch. They ended up in the obstacle course final against Bode Miller and Paige Hemmis, and predictably, they flamed out.

I just realized that I have no idea what these people are playing for. Charity? A trophy? A lifetime supply of Icy/Hot? It would actually be kind of awesome if there was no reward at the end, but everyone assumed there was because they weren't really paying attention to their agents. The look on Joanna Krupa's face alone, when she finds out she up with Owens for two weeks for nothing more than bragging rights, would make the whole enterprise worthwhile.

The moral of the story is that when you are a valuable commodity, producers will do anything to keep you on TV. But if Dan Cortese doesn't come back our lives will all be a little emptier.

The Superstars [Full episode @ ABC.com]
Previously: The Superstars Loses Its Superstar

Granted, it wasn't like watching Joe Frazier trying to swim, but it was loads of fun watching Robert Horry attempt to ride a bicycle made for someone half his size. Kudos to ABC for making an athletic competition that somehow makes everyone look un-athletic. Here's a brief recap for the TV impaired.

The show began with 8 teams—one athlete paired with a reasonably attractive celebrity. The big surprise of the first episode is that Dan Cortese (paired with Lisa Leslie) has apparently changed the pronunciation of his name to "Dan Cor-TAY-zay," with that extra Italian flourish. The first event was a crazy walk/bike race where both players had to complete a one-mile road course with only one bike between the two of them. Maksim Chmerkovskiy doesn't know how to ride a bike! Poor Jennifer Capriati ends up running the entire course, because she lost her team's bike. Brandy Chastain and Julio Iglesias Jr. quickly establish themselves as the team to beat.

The team with the greatest sexual tension is, of course, Ali Landry and Jeff Kent. She makes sure to mention that she just had a baby so that he doesn't get any ideas, even though he already has, because who wouldn't?

Round two: A kayak relay-race. John Saunders—clearly along for a free trip to the Bahamas—works his heart out on the play-by-play, constantly marveling at how bad Terrell Owens is at this game. Skier Kristi Leskinen decides to just hit people in the face with her paddle and her team wins. At the end of the two events, Jeff/Ali and T.O./Joanna square off in rubber match kayak race to see who falls into the elimination round. Owens, shockingly, keeps falling out of the boat and his team loses—leading to the aborted post-race press conference above where Joanna plays the part of an arrogant wide receiver who is getting the ball enough perfectly.

Now it's time for the incredibly lame obstacle course that isn't nearly as exciting as the commercials for Wipeout airing during the same show. It's become clear that tall people are at an extreme disadvantage in this contest, as Owens, Robert Horry and Leslie Leslie all get their long legs caught in the cargo net for extended periods of time. The Leslie/Cortaysay team end up battling the T.O./Krupa squad in a loser-goes home finale—that T.O. somehow loses, leading to Joanna's expletive filled tirade. He really is bad at this game! Saunders can't believe it!

Neither can ABC's producers, I'm sure, who just saw their one actual superstar bounced from the first round. They must have thought it was quite a coup to land an actual living athlete on their game show, but now they will have to soldier on without him. I'm reasonably certain, however, that T.O. threw the whole thing because he hated his partner and realized about ten seconds into the first day that he is way above this nonsense. (He isn't, but still.)

I am not, however, and will continue these recaps until every team is eliminated or my mind is literally blown away by a vuvuzela. Agony of defeat, etc.

Judging by the reception Owens got at the local airport last night, you'd think he was the biggest thing to hit The Nickel City since hot wings. There were cheerleaders, autograph seekers, even a guy dressed as a box of popcorn—all there in the middle of the night to see the greatest show on Earth wait in baggage claim. Is Upstate New York that desperate for entertainment?

Of course, this all makes excellent fodder for Owens' new reality show that started filming ... let's see ... last night! Do you think everyone in that crowd currently holds the title of VH1 "production assistant" or just the popcorn guy? Either way, T.O. is a one-man publicity wrecking crew that will certainly sell some red and blue t-shirts this summer—and it seems that the good, hearty people up there have no qualms playing the extras in his little fantasy world.

(This is what's known as the "love" part of the love/hate relationship. The first time he freaks out after a Trent Edwards post pass is airmailed over his head, then we'll see how giggly everyone is down at Jim's Steakout.)

Mayor Byron Brown is even giving Owens the key to the city today, despite the fact that the guy has not played a single down in a Bills uniform yet. I guess when your local heroes are all drunks, masturbators, crap rockers, Chloe Sevigny fellatio victims or Jim Kelly, a egomaniac crybaby sounds like a pretty good upgrade.

Owens Brings Limelight To A City Accustomed To Darkness [Buffalo Bills Insider]
Terrell Owens brings a reality show to Buffalo, whether it's ready or not [Gene Wojciechowski]
T.O. takes field with Buffalo Bills [Democrat and Chronicle]

Actually, ABC is playing with the formula a bit, pairing famous athletes with slightly less famous "celebrities" for a co-ed team competition that will eliminate one pairing a week until an ultimate champion is declared King of Unscripted TV. Wait until you see these teams:

• Buffalo Bills wide receiver Terrell Owens ... and model Joanna Krupa!
• Retired redneck Jeff Kent ... and retired Dorito girl Ali Landry!
• "Big Shot" Robert Horry ... and "actress" Estella Warren!
• Downhill skier Bode Miller ... and Extreme Makeover: Home Edition star Paige Hemmis!
• Freestyle skier Kristi Leskinen ... and Dancer With The Stars Maksim Chmerkovskiy!
• Sports bra spokeswoman Brandi Chastain ... and Julio Iglesias, Jr.!

and my two favorites:

• Tennis dropout Jennifer Capriati ... and Melrose Place "star" David Charvet!
• Female dunk machine Lisa Leslie ... and Dan Cortese!

There are at least six names in that group that I thought I might never hear again. Dan Cortese? Jennifer Capriati? Paige Hemmis? (That's the first time I've heard that one, actually.) This is seriously stretching the definition of the word "Superstar," but more importantly it stretches the "can't look away" trainwreck factor to dangerous levels. My DVR is hungry.

The eight teams will compete weekly in events including swimming, biking, running and kayaking. One team will be eliminated each week, leading up to the finals.

Oh no—not more swimming. That's how we nearly lost Joe Frazier....

T.O., baby! Owens set for new-look 'Superstars' [ABC 11]
Terrell Owens to Headline Latest Reincarnation of "The Superstars" [Black Sports Online]
The Superstars Show from the 1970's will return [Plain Dealer]
Stars & Athletes Pair Up For ABC Reality Competition 'The Superstars' [NBC LA]

T.O. returned the sentiment by announcing today that if Bills' workouts are not mandatory, he won't show up. That's not as bad as it sounds, actually. The Buffalo News:

"I talked to coach [Dick] Jauron prior to the start of the workouts about that," Owens told USA Today about voluntary workouts. "Right now if there's nothing mandatory that I have to be a part of, then I won't intend to be there."

"I've never gone to a voluntary workout," Owens said. "I have a personal trainer. I take very good care of myself. I take pride in coming into camp in shape. If I'm in the area, I tend to stop by the facilities and work out with the guys. You know, I'm looking forward to that type of stuff."

No, T.O.'s problems have never been with lack of training. They've been from the neck up. So maybe, this time, a little extended bonding with his teammates is more important than lifting weights in his driveway? Ah, what do I know?

T.O.: 'If It's Not Mandatory, I Won't Be There' [Buffalo News]
Welcome T.O., Buffalo [WGRZ]

"I'm leaving America's team (for) North America's team," Owens said at a news conference. "This may not be the most ideal place for a lot of people, but I'm the guy. I beat to my own beat sometimes, my own thinking, my own intuition."

Perfect. The Buffalo Bills: North America's team. So by T.O.'s geography, I guess the Miami Dolphins are South America's team?

Even though there's been "shocked" reaction by many people to T.O. landing in chilly Buffalo, where he's presumably destined to frustrate young Trent Edwards, Owens probably didn't have too many other options. Good teams — playoff caliber teams — are most likely too spooked by Owens' ability to disrupt team chemistry, regardless of his on-field production, and they're wise to do it. The only ideal situation for Terrell Owens is a squad made up entirely of clones of himself and even in that scenario he'd still somehow manage to completely alienate the team.

Peanut gallery'd:

• "Desperate? Yes. Smart? Time will tell, but the move certainly has potential. It's a bold statement on the team's part. Fans who didn't believe that the Bills had winning as their top priority can now stuff their mouths full of popcorn. You don't sign Terrell Owens unless you want to win. You only put up with the sideshow unless you think that wins are coming. Maybe they are. Maybe they aren't. For a team that is currently tied with the Detroit Lions for the NFL's longest playoff drought, it's a risk worth taking." [Buffalo Rumblings]

• Donte Whitner: "A lot of people out there perceive Marshawn [Lynch] to be this crazy young kid. But he is one of the nicest people you can ever meet, even though he has put himself in some bad situations. I believe the same thing about Terrell Owens. I talked to some of the guys down in Dallas that I'm friends with, and they all loved the guy. There's always something else that seems to get him in trouble. We'll all get to know him and make our judgments from there." [Buffalo News]

• "The Bills just don't do this. They sign players who fit their system, they stay safe in who they bring into their organization. They don't bring in malcontents. Go ahead, I dare you, name someone the Bills have signed since the free agency period started that mirrored anything like T.O.?" [Juiced Sports Blog]

•"But here's the biggest reason why Owens doesn't figure for Buffalo: He's going to one of those dead zones that even the Cingular army can't reach. Look, I love western New York, and I admire the loyalty, strength and enthusiasm of Bills' fans -– not to mention the wings down at Duff's. But western New York has a diminished fan base, and if you don't believe it then you haven't seen what the Bills are doing with Toronto." [CBSSports]

• "T.O.'s proven that he can destroy any locker room — no matter how tight it might be. The Bills are being naive to think they could be the exception. But in reality, he's being brought in as a mercenary. Buffalo apparently thinks it's one elite player away from making a playoff run. That seems like a stretch to me in the competitive AFC East." [ESPN.com]

• "The difference between the personalities of Owens and fellow enigma Randy Moss is really, really stark. Moss, all along, just needed to be surrounded by stars to keep the heat off his own back. Owens, these days, needs to exist as a sole spark in a vacuum: he needs to be the center of attention on the field, or else he'll make himself the center of attention in the locker room. Maybe instead of worrying about Edwards, we should be focused on Lee Evans and Marshawn Lynch." [The Sporting Blog]

• "If the Bills wanted to spend money to bring in a wide receiver, they should have more aggressively went after Coles, a better character guy...If you can glance into that crystal ball that Russ Brandon has on his desk however, you might see this image:

[Buffalo Low Down]

The intrepid Drew Rosenhaus, who has literally breathed life into more than one person over the years, says that Owens will be with a new team within a week.

"There are several teams that are interested in signing Terrell. I have been in negotiations with these teams. I will not identify these teams at this time. Terrell and I expect to have a deal in place by the end of next week if not sooner."

They'd better act soon. There are already 17 teams on the anti-T.O. list, which seems to be growing by the minute. And ESPN has even conducted a national poll which is currently running 75 percent against Owens. Even Alaska (80 percent) and Montana (83 percent) do not want him, should they somehow ever get an NFL franchise.

Not on the anti-T.O. list. by the way, are the Broncos, the Raiders and the Chargers. Oops, this just in: Scratch that last one.

How Is T.O. Defining Racial Lines In Dallas? [Ewe Blog]
Rosenhaus Says 'Several Teams' Are Interested In Owens [Pro Football Talk]
The Anti-T.O. List [Pro Football Talk]

Bodog.com has installed the Oakland Raiders as the favorite in the T.O. Destination Sweepstakes at 7/2, perhaps due in part to this quote by Tim Brown this morning on the NFL Network:

"He'll be a Raider by next week."

If anyone's qualified to guess on this, it would be Brown, who even wore No. 81 when he was a Raider. Next best odds lie with the Redskins at 4/1, and that seems to be the early blog consensus as well. Then we have the Jets (6/1) and the Buccaneers, Patriots and Titans at 13/2. I'm rooting for the Patriots, just to see how long Brady, Belichick, Moss and Owens can survive together in close quarters.

The full list:

Oakland Raiders 7/2
Washington Redskins 4/1
New York Jets 6/1
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 13/2
New England Patriots 13/2
Tennessee Titans 13/2
Miami Dolphins 8/1
Philadelphia Eagles 50/1
Field (any other team) 5/2

And I'm not sure who wrote it, but the best line so far is: "I think that every team should eventually be allowed to enjoy the Terrell Owens experience."

Yes, it's only fair.

UPDATE: Cross off two teams right away in the T.O. Derby. The Florida Sun Sentinel says that there is no way an Owens-Bill Parcells reunion will take place. And the New York Giants have made it official, sending Owens an un-invitation earlier today.

UPDATE: OK, take the 49ers off of the list as well. (Whew).

NFL Football Player Props [Bodog]
Ha Ha, And The Top 10 Next Teams For Terrell Owens [Five Tool Tool]
I Can See It Now ... [Fack Youk]
Why The Redskins Must Sign Terrell Owens [Stet Sports Blog]
Top 15 Reasons The Cowboys Released Terrell Owens [Gunaxin]
TO = To Oakland [Arrowhead Addict]

Not that he didn't deserve a significant chunk of the blame. He fought with teammates—when he wasn't crying sympathetic tears for them—schemed behind their back, accused them of scheming behind his, and basically created giant unnecessary distractions. Oh, he also played football and had a decent, but somewhat disappointing season. So just one year into his four-year contract, Jones would prefer to eat the $9 million salary cap hit rather than keep Owens around for another game. I'm sure that will solve everything.

So where does Owens go next? He's too good to not play somewhere, but everyone seems to agree that the Raiders are the most obvious fit. Shouldn't the most insane and dysfunctional team have the league's most insane and dysfunctional player?

So we're all agreed then?

* * * * * *

Here's what some other bloggers who stay up much later then we do had to say:

• Might go insane?: "I'm actually sort of worried about the guy. Without football or a similar venue to catch the public eye, he might go insane. He'll just randomly show up at ESPN asking if they need him for an interview. Then he'll hang around the Today Show, hoping Al Roker will talk to him on camera. Eventually, he'll film his own show in his basement and convince himself that it's airing nationally. [Bootlegger Sports]

• But he has the former Lion swagger: And the Cowboys, thinking they have the answer with Roy Williams (WR version) are clearly putting their eggs in that basket. Nevermind Williams was slightly less than an afterthought in the Cowboys offense last season. Sure, he wasn't in camp with the team and didn't already have the rapport with QB Tony Romo, but he's got a long way to go to match the productivity Owens provided Dallas the last three seasons. [No Joshin']

• Tradition maybe; pride left town a long time ago: I for one think this is a great move by the Cowboys. It proves several things, and the most important is there are people at Valley Ranch that still have a back bone. The Cowboys have too much tradition and pride to give it away to any player, especially to a player that loves him some him so much, he claimed Romo and Witten had a thing going on. [Lewp's Weblog]

• Good times: Here's some of T.O.'s greatest hits. [Gunaxin]

• ESPN does lover murder: "Asked about T.O.'s next stop in the NFL, ESPN's Keyshawn had this to say (It comes at the very end of the clip):

"If Charles Manson could play football, believe me somebody will try and sign him."

Yikes! Comparing T.O. to a mass murderer. Thankfully Cris Carter, of the bullet theory, didn't make it on the air last night. Remember this Carter gem: "If it was me, I'd get rid of T.O. T.O. got to go from the beginning. Right from the giddy up. I take one bullet and put it right in him. Bam!" [Dallas Morning News]

Jerry Jones attempted to explain the gag order to some media members last night, and Albert Breer of the Sporting News was among them.

In particular, he was angry over two recent reports. First, he denied ever having players over to his home to discuss Terrell Owens' future with the team. Second, he refuted the report that he and his son, chief operating officer Stephen Jones, were debating the subject and that the son was trying convince his father to cut Owens.

How gagging your head coach is going to keep these alleged lies from coming out in the media is beyond me, but I'm not insane. Wade Phillips obviously had no comment on the gag order itself, but he has expressed interest in a gag of the bacon-flavored variety.

The Sporting News via The Sporting Blog