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New York, 8:49 AM
Mon Dec 7
15 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #thingsthatmakemefeelbetteraboutmycollegeyears more →

    A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Nacho Friendly Nacho Friendly
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    Abstemious is one of two words in the English language with all the vowels in alphabetical order. The other one?


    I'LL NEVER TELL!!!

     Reply
    Nacho Friendly was starred Nacho Friendly was unstarred
    Image of UkraineNotWeak UkraineNotWeak
    06/04/09

    @Nacho Friendly:


    Faceitous

     Reply
    UkraineNotWeak was starred UkraineNotWeak was unstarred
    Image of UkraineNotWeak UkraineNotWeak
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    This piece lasted longer than Jeff the first time.
     Reply
    UkraineNotWeak was starred UkraineNotWeak was unstarred
    Image of Stev D Stev D
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    You want to see an embarrassing videos made while in college, check out Firehouse Rookie #8. Actually, don't.
     Reply
    Stev D was starred Stev D was unstarred
    Image of Gourmet Spud Gourmet Spud
    06/04/09

    @Stev D:


    Jesus! I can't tell who I feel worse for, you or the Dalmation.

     Reply
    Gourmet Spud was starred Gourmet Spud was unstarred
    Image of A Pimp Named DaveR A Pimp Named DaveR
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    Now Jeff's not the world's most masculine man... But he knows what he is, and he's glad he's a man.


    And so was Lola.

     Reply
    A Pimp Named DaveR was starred A Pimp Named DaveR was unstarred
    Image of Weed Against Speed Weed Against Speed
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    Embarrassing, yes, but it's still far better than having Carl Monday interested in interviewing you.
     Reply
    Weed Against Speed was starred Weed Against Speed was unstarred
    Image of Andy Hutchins Andy Hutchins
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    The really good news here: Brian Hickey's doing better now.
     Reply
    Andy Hutchins was starred Andy Hutchins was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    06/04/09

    @Andy Hutchins: Hey! Welcome back!
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of UkraineNotWeak UkraineNotWeak
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    Till this day, Jeff's mom still keeps this piece of video right next to his Bar Mitzvah album.
     Reply
    UkraineNotWeak was starred UkraineNotWeak was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    06/04/09

    @UkraineNotWeak: He was every Jewish mother's dream until he became a sportswriter.
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of Hatey McLife Hatey McLife
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin


    Gary Glitter has plenty of similar pictures, available in .jpeg, .gif or .png format.

     Reply
    Hatey McLife was starred Hatey McLife was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    Pearlman went on to say, "So come on baby, won't you show some class. Why you want to move so fast? We don't have to take our clothes off to have a good time. Oh no."
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of Gourmet Spud Gourmet Spud
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    Dialogue at 1:40:


    Pearlman: Hey Bry, can you give me that piece on last night's soccer game?


    Hickey: Not gonna give it to you...but I know of a way you can earn it, Virg...

     Reply
    Gourmet Spud was starred Gourmet Spud was unstarred
    Image of Will Leitch Will Leitch
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    OK, this is pretty fantastic. And he looks like Eric Harris!
     Reply
    Will Leitch was starred Will Leitch was unstarred
    Image of Will Leitch Will Leitch
    06/04/09

    @Will Leitch: For the record, I find it more embarrassing that Jeff's skydiving video on his YouTube page is scored by Creed:

    _page
     Reply
    Will Leitch was starred Will Leitch was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    06/04/09

    @Will Leitch: You deserve your star back. Also half of Denton's net worth.
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of HockeyMountain HockeyMountain
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    I consider myself a man just as much as anybody.


    Oh young naive kid, you're not even 40 yet.

     Reply
    HockeyMountain was starred HockeyMountain was unstarred
    Image of Stev D Stev D
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    But if he doesn't lose his virginity by graduation, the University will close down the student center!
     Reply
    Stev D was starred Stev D was unstarred
    Image of Gourmet Spud Gourmet Spud
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    More like The Rocket That Stayed in His Pocket, am I right?
     Reply
    Gourmet Spud was starred Gourmet Spud was unstarred
    Image of FEAST FEAST
    06/04/09

    In reply to A Portrait Of The Columnist As A Young Virgin
    READ MORE: MEDIA MELTDOWNS, JEFF PEARLMAN, SPORTS ILLUSTRATED, WHIMSY, A.C. GREEN, THINGS THAT MAKE ME FEEL BETTER ABOUT MY COLLEGE YEARS, IMPOTENCE
     Reply
    FEAST was starred FEAST was unstarred
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