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New York, 11:06 PM
Tue Dec 8
14 posts in the last 24 hours

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Clare Clare
    07:41 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    As a Kimberly-Clark stock holder, FUCK YOU FOR IMPUGNING SCOTTISSUE!!! Fuck you very much!
     Reply
    Clare was starred Clare was unstarred
    Image of Clarence Rosario Clarence Rosario
    06:12 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    Wait, is your brother-in-law's wife *really* your sister-in-law?

    Or just some dude's wife you're in no way related to?
     Reply
    Clarence Rosario was starred Clarence Rosario was unstarred
    Image of ClintonPortishead ClintonPortishead
    05:50 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    So your father attempted to have a loving moment and you, in your perpetual coolness, told him to fuck off? You know you're a real ---

    Nah, who am I kidding. Fuck the elderly.
     Reply
    ClintonPortishead was starred ClintonPortishead was unstarred
    Image of Hatey McLife Hatey McLife
    04:57 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    ("This steak is good, but when I was in Argentina, we had REAL steak.")

    People bitch about the genocide and all, but if you've had a porterhouse from the Mengele hacienda, you'd know it was all worth it.
     Reply
    Hatey McLife was starred Hatey McLife was unstarred
    Image of Cognitive Friction Cognitive Friction
    04:55 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    re: last night's "Intervention"

    Greg's daughter was hot.

    That is all.
     Reply
    Cognitive Friction was starred Cognitive Friction was unstarred
    Image of FEAST FEAST
    04:54 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    A 4-6 hour shit?

    I don't see how this would be possible. My legs fall asleep when I spend an extra few minutes banging out a Sudoku on the toilet.
     Reply
    FEAST was starred FEAST was unstarred
    Image of P. Escobar, Jets Fan P. Escobar, Jets Fan
    04:51 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    Is there a movie, as a heterosexual man, you like that other men would consider really gay?

    I win this one: My Own Private Idaho
     Reply
    P. Escobar, Jets Fan was starred P. Escobar, Jets Fan was unstarred
    Image of Mr. Praline Mr. Praline
    04:52 PM

    @P. Escobar, Jets Fan: I dunno. Chariots of Fire makes me cry.
     Reply
    Mr. Praline was starred Mr. Praline was unstarred
    Image of P. Escobar, Jets Fan P. Escobar, Jets Fan
    04:54 PM

    @Mr. Praline: Yeah, but at least that's about sports. Mines stars River Phoenix and features him sucking off old men in strange places.
     Reply
    P. Escobar, Jets Fan was starred P. Escobar, Jets Fan was unstarred
    Image of qverbal qverbal
    04:56 PM

    @P. Escobar, Jets Fan: Got you beat....Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion

    //used to be in love with Mira Sorvino
     Reply
    FlakJack approved this comment qverbal was starred qverbal was unstarred
    Image of Mr. Praline Mr. Praline
    05:03 PM

    @P. Escobar, Jets Fan: Wow, that even beats Mommie Dearest.
     Reply
    Mr. Praline was starred Mr. Praline was unstarred
    Image of Jefferson Tardship Jefferson Tardship
    05:43 PM

    @Mr. Praline: But... but... Mommie Dearest features rampant alcoholism! Doesn't that offset at least some of the gay?

    /might own the special edition DVD of Mommie Dearest
    //might get drunk as fuck and watch it at least once a year
     Reply
    Jefferson Tardship was starred Jefferson Tardship was unstarred
    Image of FlakJack FlakJack
    05:44 PM

    @qverbal: Yes. I always stop at this movie when I'm channel surfing, mainly to enjoy Mira all dolled up and working that sultry, vacant monotone God gave her. Amen.
     Reply
    FlakJack was starred FlakJack was unstarred
    Image of FavreFAIL FavreFAIL
    06:00 PM

    @P. Escobar, Jets Fan: Coming from a gay man, I can tell you with 100% certainty that "My Own Private Idaho" is, in fact, gay. Not for the sucking men off part, but rather for all the Jack Falstaff references.
     Reply
    Mr. Praline promoted this comment Edited by FavreFAIL at 12/08/09 6:00 PM FavreFAIL was starred FavreFAIL was unstarred
    Image of Botswana Meat Commission FC Botswana Meat Commission FC
    07:24 PM

    @P. Escobar, Jets Fan: I inexplicably love "The Color Purple."
     Reply
    Botswana Meat Commission FC was starred Botswana Meat Commission FC was unstarred
    Image of Hit Bull Win Steak Hit Bull Win Steak
    04:47 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    Well, go fuck a sheep, Frodo.

    That's exactly how my first attempt at eHarmony ended.
     Reply
    Hit Bull Win Steak was starred Hit Bull Win Steak was unstarred
    Image of AzureTexan AzureTexan
    04:47 PM

    In reply to Friday Night Blight: Why High School Football Is Ground Zero Of The Concussion Epidemic
    Meanwhile, in local Pop Warner ball, the Bubble-Wrap Boys report no injuries as they prepare for Saturday's clash against a down comforter.

    But seriously. Great piece, great points.
     Reply
    Edited by AzureTexan at 12/08/09 4:47 PM AzureTexan was starred AzureTexan was unstarred
    Image of ScientificMapp ScientificMapp
    04:37 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    He proposed a culture of urinals for women, similar to what female astronauts use.

    "Ahem?"
    -Lisa Nowak
     Reply
    Edited by ScientificMapp at 12/08/09 4:39 PM ScientificMapp was starred ScientificMapp was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    04:26 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    I like regular, daily pooping.

    I hate your guts, Magary.

    -Martin Landau
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    04:14 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    My shortstop was a compact prisoner from another state serving life for a heinous child rape/murder.

    He still doesn't bother me as much as Jeter.
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of cazart cazart
    04:32 PM

    @MarkKelsosMigraine: Hilarious!
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine promoted this comment cazart was starred cazart was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    04:35 PM

    @cazart: Yeah, I'm aware it was weak.
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of DirkToberFest DirkToberFest
    04:46 PM

    @MarkKelsosMigraine: Your joke was so weak that if it were a beverage commonly served at a bar, it would be O'Doul's.
     Reply
    DirkToberFest was starred DirkToberFest was unstarred
    Image of cazart cazart
    07:34 PM

    @MarkKelsosMigraine: I was being serious. Here, let me try:

    "Brian Sabean offered him four years and sixteen mil anyway."
     Reply
    cazart was starred cazart was unstarred
    Image of Silent Q Silent Q
    04:10 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    Quilted Northern used to be very thick and velvety. BUT THEY CHANGED THE FORMULA, I TELL YOU. It became fucking Scott Tissue overnight.

    If I may make a recommendation - go with the Charmin Ultra Soft. Sure, it might cost a little more than your Cottonelle or Northern, but it's everything I imagine wiping my ass with a cloud would be like. Seriously. A fucking cloud, Drew.
     Reply
    Edited by Silent Q at 12/08/09 4:11 PM Silent Q was starred Silent Q was unstarred
    Image of notthequarterback notthequarterback
    04:06 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    You lived in South Quad? That explains so much.
     Reply
    notthequarterback was starred notthequarterback was unstarred
    Image of DirkToberFest DirkToberFest
    04:06 PM

    In reply to The Biggest, Dirtiest, Poopiest Mailbag Yet
    I played STQ when my family lived in Chicago when I was about 5 or so. So there's two places the game was played

    Tim Hardaway doesn't raise queers, so he told his kids to call it "Tackle the Man with the Ball."
     Reply
    DirkToberFest was starred DirkToberFest was unstarred
    Image of roland_t_flakfizer roland_t_flakfizer
    04:40 PM

    @DirkToberFest: BruteSquad
    04:27 PM

    @DirkToberFest: I played it in Texas, too. We played a form of soccer called "Fuck You" - which was soccer with no rules when the teachers were on the other side of the playground. It got down right nasty, and it was very satisfying when 2 guys collided into each other and missed the ball.

    Did any other starred commenters see this and think it was the program info from a gay porn feature?
     Reply
    roland_t_flakfizer was starred roland_t_flakfizer was unstarred
    Image of DirkToberFest DirkToberFest
    04:44 PM

    @roland_t_flakfizer: Gay porn wasn't the first thing to come to mind. I immediately thought, "this guy will never get approved if he brags about playing "nasty soccer." Then I thought of porn.

    Then I went to the bathroom to clean up. And now I'm back typing this comment!
     Reply
    DirkToberFest was starred DirkToberFest was unstarred
    Earlier discussions Other discussions Show all discussions Show featured discussions only Start a new discussion

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