How To Beat Portugal: A Blueprint From 2002

On Sunday, the United States will take the field against Portugal in Manaus, where, despite a dramatic victory over Ghana and Portugal's feeble showing against Germany, the Yanks will find themselves as slight underdogs. » 6/21/14 12:42pm 6/21/14 12:42pm

John Boye's Foot Rearranged Clint Dempsey's Face

It was an incidental injury, but after what happened to Jozy seeing another star player on the turf is the last thing any USMNT fan wanted to see. As it turns out, the injury was superficial, if painful-looking. Here's Clint Dempsey's nose being displaced in extreme slow motion. » 6/16/14 6:55pm 6/16/14 6:55pm

Jozy Altidore Stretchered Off With Apparent Hamstring Injury

The glee that followed Clint Dempsey's opening goal turned sour early in the U.S. match against Ghana as striker Jozy Altidore pulled up and was eventually taken off the pitch on a stretcher after suffering what looks like a serious hamstring injury. » 6/16/14 6:52pm 6/16/14 6:52pm

T.J. Oshie Beats Russia In 4-3 Shootout

T.J. Oshie's four shootout goals proved the difference as the United States beat Russia 3-2 (4-3). It took eight rounds of penalty shots before the right combination of Jonathan Quick save and Oshie goal could be properly paired up. » 2/15/14 10:27am 2/15/14 10:27am

Bull Runs Will Soon Be Coming To The United States

Americans who want to entertain the risk of possibly getting gored by a bull won't have to travel all the way to Pamplona, Spain anymore. They can now brush with death in their own country! » 8/03/13 3:15pm 8/03/13 3:15pm

The U.S. Avenged Its Jamaica Loss Before A Raucous Columbus Crowd, And…

Desperately needing a win after dropping the ball in Jamaica last week, the U.S. Men's National Team rode the wave of a rowdy crowd in Columbus to eke out a 1-0 World Cup qualifier win last night, though not without a bit of struggling. » 9/12/12 12:45pm 9/12/12 12:45pm

The Shrieking, AIDS-Joking, Gulati-Taunting Ugly Americans Of The World…

PRETORIA, South Africa — A few hours before the gut-roiling USA victory here, I witnessed a tense moment of another sort when two well-lubricated American yahoos tore into Sunil Gulati, the head of the U.S. Soccer Federation. Here's how it unfolded ... » 6/25/10 3:00pm 6/25/10 3:00pm

A Beauty In Joburg: Watching Slovenia-USA With The Ladies Of The Miss…

JOHANNESBURG — Slovenia-USA had it all. There was the immediate and customary American breakdown. The stirring comeback. A bastard shit evil ref, more evil than that bastard shit Larrionda in 2006. And then there were the Miss World contestants. » 6/21/10 9:40am 6/21/10 9:40am

World Cup Open Thread: Slovenia-United States (Final: 3-2 Draw)

U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! FINAL: Slovenia 2, United States 2, Koman Coulibaly 1 » 6/18/10 10:00am 6/18/10 10:00am

U.S.A.-England Tie Given The Lego Treatment

Here's the Lego version of the U.S. England goal. You haven't lived until you've seen a Lego Robert Green lay down on a Lego soccer field in Lego shame. H/T Denton. [The Guardian, via Business Insider] » 6/14/10 1:30pm 6/14/10 1:30pm