Virginia Tech appears to have eschewed typical action photos for some glamour shots they took at a Blacksburg Kohl's. Because nothing says intimidation like a mid-air freeze frame reminiscent of Mary Tyler Moore, or your defense posing like 15-year-old girls watching Twilight at a slumber party.

But lest you think this demasculinization is endemic to the ACC and SEC, here's video of USC's first team meeting, where the room (spontaneously, I hope) breaks out into a rendition of "Lean On Me." With bonus Pete Carroll as the piano man!

Two years ago, Greg Paulus was posterized (sorta) during a game against Virginia Tech. Since Paulus plays for Duke and everyone on the planet hates him with the white hot fire of 1,000 suns, it was decided that this moment must be memorialized forever. So the school built a $21 million basketball practice facility just so they could have a place to literally hang a poster in honor of their favorite villain.

And there it hangs. This gigantic photo will remain in Blacksburg for all eternity, as an everlasting reminder to Hokie fans from around the globe that Greg Paulus was kind of annoying. The name of the young fella providing the facing escapes me, but I'm sure he did some other nice things too.

Hoops programs set to move into new practice facility [Hokie Sports]

* * * * *

Here's comes Monday. Up and at them!

Blammo!

This was the hardest hit Virigina Tech took all day [Barstool Sports]

2. What are you, a freshman? With the exception of Deron Washington, A.D. Vassallo, and bench players Lewis Witcher, and Cheick "Recheickted" Diakite, freshmen have received most of the minutes this season. Seth Greenberg brought in his best recruiting class since becoming coach at Virginia Tech, and it has shown. Jeff Allen, at 6'7" and 258 pounds, has been a force down low this season averaging 12.4 points, 7.8 rebounds, 2.14 steals per game to earn a spot on the ACC All-Rookie team. Allen has been huge for the Hokies this season, when he's not off bumping officials and getting suspended (URL#2). Though more of a shooting guard, Malcolm Delaney has been the starting point guard for most of the season and has had some success. He has a sweet stroke from beyond the arch and though he has struggled some against older, stronger guards, has shown flashes of greatness so far this season. Backing him up is the surprise of the season, 5'9" (on a phone book), 140 pound freshman Hank Thorns. The smallest player in the ACC playing significant minutes (22.1), Thorns has been huge coming off the bench, bringing in 104 assists on the season, good for ninth in the league and the most among ACC freshmen. Not to be forgotten, J.T. Thompson has emerged as a legitimate low post threat in ACC play and Terrell Bell has played well in limited minutes behind senior Deron Washington. Lastly, shooting guard Dorenzo Hudson joined the team in December, and he made sure everyone knew he was here by vomiting on the court against Maryland (URL#3). The Terps make me sick too, Dorenzo.

Eric Gordon has nothing on this guy. Speaking of Terps making me sick, let me tell you about Gus Gilchrist. In November 2006, Gus Gilchrist was a small time PF/C recruit who had committed to Virginia Tech. Prior to his senior season, he was largely under the radar to most ACC coaches and was not highly sought after. Seth Greenberg found him, and he believed he could be great for the Hokies. Seth was right, and his greatness began to show during his senior season. His numbers skyrocketed, he became the MVP of the Capital Classic, and his status as a major basketball recruit was flying up the charts. Fortunately for the Hokies, he was all locked up when he signed his letter of intent, right? Wrong. April 16 came for Virginia Tech, and to add insult to injury, Gus used the incident to get out of his letter of intent. He and his scumbag trainer, Terrelle Woody, looked at offers from other schools and eventually decided on Maryland. By doing this, Gus had to sit out this season, will sit the first half of next season, and has lost a year of eligibility. I don't know if you noticed, Gus, but we swept Maryland this year, you lowlife.The Hokie Nation is going to unleash hell on you next season in Cassell Coliseum. Good riddance. — Joe Crandley

DC Sports Bog is, of course, all over it.

The clean-up seemed to go on forever, one absorption tactic followed by another cleansing effort, minute after minute ticking by, as the coaches wondered what happening and the floor was wiped cleaner than the men's room at a Hannah Montana show. At last the teams played the final 59 seconds of the half, and then the crew did even more cleaning up during halftime, dealing with what was described to me as a mixture of macaroni and Gatorade.

Ah, February is just the best sports month.

Terps Gag, Hokies Puke: The Story [DC Sports Bog]

What excited us most about the win? We think it would have to be that fake punt. Any time a team pulls off one of the following plays and wins, they deserve extra credit:

• Flea flicker.
• Statue of Liberty play.
• Hidden ball trick.
• Fake punt.
• Fake field goal. (Double points for this one, actually.)

This has been such a bizarre year. Kansas and Missouri blitz through their bowl games, and Oklahoma gets hammered by an then-interim coach. Next thing you're gonna tell us is that Illinois played in the Rose Bowl.

B-C-Yes Indeed [Lawrence Journal World]

And, of course, we get another one tonight, and we ask, again, FOX broadcasters to limit the Virginia Tech massacre references to under five. This is probably being unreasonable. Maybe we can just hope for less than 30.

Just one more silly, unnecessary bowl game to go until the one that counts ... and then you can feel free to ignore that one too.

The Hokies named the hall after Vick when he made a "sizable donation," and since they don't plan on returning the money anytime soon, they see no reason to change the name.

The Hokies retired Vick's jersey in 2002, the year after the quarterback was drafted out of Tech by the Atlanta Falcons. The number itself is still given out to players. [Athletic Director Jim] Weaver said that although he doesn't condone Vick's actions, he doesn't see a need to lower No. 7 from a place of honor at the Lane Stadium.

"He earned that when he was here, before he ever was involved in these activities," Weaver said Monday.

Wait, they retired his number but still give it out to players? How is that retiring it? Oh, and the vet school isn't near that Hall, is it?

By the way: Stephon Marbury would like to clarify ... himself.

Despite Mixed Emotions Vick Hall Will Stand [Sons Of Sam Malone]

The DC United take the field tonight (I should probably clarify that they're an MLS team, and that MLS is a professional American soccer league) against the Columbus Crew in maroon Virginia Tech tribute jerseys. And on Monday, those jerseys will be auctioned off with the proceeds benefitting the Hokie Spirit Memorial Fund.

So, if the mood strikes you, bid on one. Or at least pass this information on to someone who might. And watch the game, too, and root for the United because they obviously care about the tragedy more than the soulless sons of bitches in Columbus. If this goes well, it'll raise more for the fund than the $10,000 donated by Michael Vick, a sum he could take in on an average weekend of gate receipts for backyard dog-fighting contests.

Virginia Tech tribute & auction [BobbyBoswell.com]

And then, four months later, you find out that the guy who unknowingly bought your tickets from turns out to be Seung-Hui Cho.

"I got chills when I received the first e-mail Saturday morning," said [Georgia junior Casey] Spivey, a pre-medicine major from Jonesboro. "I was not expecting to get caught in the middle of this."

Spivey and his friend Patrick Dolan, who went to the game with him, are selling their tickets and giving the proceeds to families of Virginia Tech victims. We wonder who, in fact, will buy them.

Cho Sold Peach Bowl Tickets To University Students Last Winter [The Red And Black]

First, the Nationals all wore Virginia Tech hats last night, though we wonder how much comfort anyone can possibly take from Dmitri Young. In addition, it turns out that one of the victims, Brian Bluhm, was a Tigers fan and one of the frequent posters at MotownSports.com; he had been set to graduate in two weeks.

And even closer to home: As some of you might know, Nick Dallamora, one of the three geniuses behind The Dugout, is a student at Virginia Tech and a resident of the Ambler Johnston dorm where the initial shooting happened. Nick is fine, if obviously shaken (The Dugout is taking a few days off), and has been writing about the experience at The Fanhouse. We've been emailing with Nick the last few days, and he accepted our invitation to write about the experience in Blacksburg. His words are after the jump.

Through Hokie Eyes [The Fanhouse]
The Dugout
Nationals Finally Do Something Right [Saved By The Blog]
We're All Hokies Today [Politico]

—————————-

When Monday's incidents unfolded nothing hit like hearing those numbers climb so drastically. I remember seeing Fox News report 30 deaths and saying to my roommate "This is why I hate Fox News they always blow numbers out of proportion. Change it." When CNN reported 32, I checked MSNBC, who reported 33. It felt like my head had been frozen for 10 years and was just now decaying. How many? Are you sure?

It sounds cliche, but it wasn't until [Tuesday] that everything began sinking in. Prior to today's convocation I cursed that messed-up bastard to everyone I talked to, and in the few spare moments I had to myself I cursed him under my breath. The fiery hate in my chest masked what I should have been feeling, which was sorrow. I was pissed at how a demented psychopath could walk behind me on my way to class, bear left and kill 30 kids at no expense of his own. What kind of messed up world is it where you aren't safe in a small southern college town? I was pissed at society as a whole, like we could all have been that twisted and it just happened to be that guy's day. That was until today.

Today I saw what I eyeballed at 20,000+ people in attendance at the convocation. When the basketball stadium filled they overflowed us into Lane Stadium where we covered the playing field and stands. We were all either in suits, dresses, or our Saturday's best. It was the only time I can remember feeling overdressed in mesh shorts, a football jersey and a cap. We shared, we cried, and we patted each other on the shoulder with a solemn nod. For 24 hours we were all lost, but today we came back together to support each other.

It was there that Nikki Giovanni gave the most spine-tingling speech I have ever heard. She ended with:

We are strong and brave and innocent and unafraid. We are better than we think, not quite what we want to be. We are alive to the imagination and the possibility we will continue to invent the future through our blood and tears, through all this sadness. We are the Hokies! We will prevail, we will prevail! We are Virginia Tech!

The crowd absolutely blew up. I think we all realized just what being a Hokie meant at that point. It's not that we didn't know before, but yesterday it changed and it won't ever be the same again. Being a Hokie means being strong, supporting and helping those around you through adversity, and knowing the rest of us are here for you when things get too heavy.

We are the Hokies and we will prevail.

VIRGINIA TECH HOKIES

1. Can't Win the Small Ones. The Hokies finished their ACC season 10-6, their best mark in the conference and one game out of first place. The weird part? Tech was 5-2 against the top four teams in the conference, including 3-0 against teams ranked in the national top five, but only 3-4 against the bottom five teams, including two double-digit losses to N.C. State and Sidney Lowe's red blazer. It doesn't help that three of their four non-conference losses came to powerhouses Marshall, Western Michigan and a George Washington team that's having a down year. On the other hand, Virginia Tech was the first team to beat both Duke and UNC on the road in the same season since Georgia Tech in the 1995-96 season, and only the third team to do so in the last 25 years. But it's all about ending the futility: Virginia Tech hasn't been to the NCAA tournament since 1996, when Ace Custis patrolled the lane and the Hokies were in the Atlantic-10 conference. To put that in perspective, 1996 was the year the "Macarena" was the top-selling single in America.

2. A Ballsy Move. Junior forward Deron Washington has provided plenty of highlight plays this season with his freakish athleticism and constant hustle, and his retro look also provided fodder for a sign at UVA that read, "Hey Deron, the 80's wants its sweatband back." Sweatband aside, Washington inspired Duke haters everywhere by putting his sweaty manparts in Greg Paulus' face on his way to a layup in Tech's 67-65 upset of Duke at Cameron Indoor. Washington later sealed the deal by blocking Paulus' last-ditch heave out of bounds at the buzzer. The sweatband compares with only A.D. Vassalo's penchant for shaving "PR" into the back of his hair, reminding the entire world that he is a shoot-first guard from Puerto Rico, for most interesting Tech hair.

3. The Ones That Got Away. Sometimes missing out is good, sometimes it's bad. Tech coach Seth Greenberg offered Stephen Curry, son of Virginia Tech Hall of Famer Dell Curry, a walk-on opportunity with the Hokies in response to Curry's desire to follow his dad's footsteps at VT. Today, Curry is leading Davidson in scoring and shooting 41 percent from behind the arc, which would help a Tech team that is shooting just 35.6 percent from deep this season. Also, the man Greenberg replaced at Tech, basketball legend Ricky Stokes, is currently running the East Carolina program into the ground much as he did the Hokies. Stokes took the Pirates helm after departing Blacksburg after the 2003 season with a sterling 46-69 record. Among those 46 wins was a grand total of 10 in three seasons of Big East conference play. Greenberg won seven in his only year coaching in the conference. — Brad Hinshelwood

ILLINOIS FIGHTING ILLINI

1. Breaking The Social Contract. In a season that was riddled with repeated freak injuries and the thank-God-we-might-not-have-to-talk-about-the-Chief-anymore madness, the most bizarre story was the late-season car crash involving guard Jamar Smith and center Brian Carlwell. In case you've been fortunate enough to forget, during a severe ice storm, Smith — who was later discovered to have been drunk — skidded across the road and crashed into a tree, destroying his car and knocking Carlwell out. Smith, rather than call the police, drove the car home and went inside his apartment. Why? Because he thought Carlwell was dead. (Carlwell spent nearly a week in the hospital in critical condition; the police only knew about the incident because one of Smith's neighbors saw the car and called 911.) I'll say this: If one of my friends knocks me out in a car crash and leaves me for dead in the car (during an ice storm), it's unlikely we are going to remain friends.

2. This Is Not A Fun Team To Watch. Pity the poor Illini first-round opponent. Not because Illinois is a particularly formidable opponent — they're not — but because they might play the least visually appealing form of basketball in the country. Thing is, kids, Illinois is not an offensively skilled team — to say the least. The Illini have Shawn Pruitt underneath, Warren Carter slashing ... and four guards who either can't dribble, can't shoot or (more often) both. Illinois' defense is as solid as anyone's in the country — Chester Frazier is particularly nettlesome — but if you watched that wretched Big Ten tourney game against Wisconsin, you recognize that all the defense does is make the other team look as, or as nearly, offensively inept as the Illini. This makes for a lot of 53-48 games that are hideous to witness.

3. The Embattled Duck Man. Coach Bruce Weber, who looks, talks and walks like a duck but is not, in fact, a duck, came under considerable fire this year, not just for his team's off-court problems, but also for their lack of cohesion on offense. But considering how much of a shitstorm the season has been in every possible way, it's rather amazing the Illini are in the NCAAs at all. It's a testament to Weber's insistence on frantic defense — which is even more impressive considering Weber was known as an offensive specialist when he came to Illinois — that they could have made it this far. In an odd way, it might have been his best, if most taxing, coaching job yet. Now, about that recruiting ... — Will Leitch

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2. A Ballsy Move. Junior forward Deron Washington has provided plenty of highlight plays this season with his freakish athleticism and constant hustle, and his retro look also provided fodder for a sign at UVA that read, "Hey Deron, the 80's wants its sweatband back." Sweatband aside, Washington inspired Duke haters everywhere by putting his sweaty manparts in Greg Paulus' face on his way to a layup in Tech's 67-65 upset of Duke at Cameron Indoor. Washington later sealed the deal by blocking Paulus' last-ditch heave out of bounds at the buzzer. The sweatband compares with only A.D. Vassalo's penchant for shaving "PR" into the back of his hair, reminding the entire world that he is a shoot-first guard from Puerto Rico, for most interesting Tech hair.

3. The Ones That Got Away. Sometimes missing out is good, sometimes it's bad. Tech coach Seth Greenberg offered Stephen Curry, son of Virginia Tech Hall of Famer Dell Curry, a walk-on opportunity with the Hokies in response to Curry's desire to follow his dad's footsteps at VT. Today, Curry is leading Davidson in scoring and shooting 41 percent from behind the arc, which would help a Tech team that is shooting just 35.6 percent from deep this season. Also, the man Greenberg replaced at Tech, basketball legend Ricky Stokes, is currently running the East Carolina program into the ground much as he did the Hokies. Stokes took the Pirates helm after departing Blacksburg after the 2003 season with a sterling 46-69 record. Among those 46 wins was a grand total of 10 in three seasons of Big East conference play. Greenberg won seven in his only year coaching in the conference. — Brad Hinshelwood

In case you had any doubt left — though we don't know how you could have — that a ballot in the hands of college football coaches is a dangerous thing, here's the All-American ballot from Virginia Tech head coach Frank Beamer.

If you don't like looking at scrawled handwriting, that's six Hokies on Beamer's ballot. We respect his discretion in avoiding writing his own name as coach of the year.

I promised you more Kirk Herbstreit vitriol, and here it is. During Thursday night's Virginia Tech/Boston College game, Herbie delights in verbally lighting up Virginia Tech linebacker Brenden Hill.

Hill's the guy on the field dancing to music being played by the Boston College band in celebration of BC's 20-3 lead at that point. I guess Kirk Herbstreit would prefer that he ran immediately to the locker room when Boston College took the lead, and hung himself from a light fixture.

Herbstreit really seems to be enjoying himself there. It feels like Herbstreit is just aching to use profanity. If this had taken place on HBO, he'd have probably called the guy a pussy.

Who doesn't rock out to Neil Diamond? [Eagle in Atlanta]

Vick, however, is undaunted.

"I'm gonna show you in the future," he said. "The teams that don't pick me, I'm gonna get the chance to play you, and you are going to be sitting up in the box saying, 'Damn, we should have considered him. We should have taken him.' "

Considering the teams that didn't pick New Mexico include "all of them," we assume he's talking about Arena Football. Oh, and we mean Arena Football 2.

QB Says He Has Matured [ESPN]
Vick Goes Undrafted [Washington Times]

Not that New Mexico didn't have enough ugly marks on his resume, but now we're looking at a guy who:

• Has had nothing but off-field troubles.
• Is slower and has a worse arm than his brother.
• Stomps the legs of defenders when they're lying on the ground.
• Is fortunate to be able to write his name in the ground with a stick.

Yeah. We're pretty certain the Buzzsaw is gonna draft him. Second round, we bet.

NFL Draft Almanac (via Bad Jocks)

Redshirt freshman quarterback Ike Whitaker, the man expected to eventually replace the gun-totingm Happy Meal-addled whack job that was Marcus "New Mexico" Vick, was indefinitely suspended by the Hokies for a "violation of team policy." The offense appears to be an arrest for purchasing and possessing alcohol, which he can't do, since he's just 18.

A source in Hokieland tells us, however, that Whitaker's hardly a younger Vick clone. In fact, he's oddly noble.

"Supposedly, he was seen downtown at the bars drunk [Wednesday] night, and when he was walking back to the dorms, he decided to heckle two kids sitting in a dorm. The group he was with accidently smashed a window, and while everyone else ran he decided it'd be the best idea to stay and explain to the cops that it's just an accident. The police showed up and smelled alcohol on his breath, so they took him into custody."

Ah, Ike. When a window is broken, you run. Hell, you surely run faster than your friends; let them take the heat. Freshmen. So much to learn.

Hokies QB Whitaker Suspended From Team [DailyPress.com]

"he didn t do anything wrong. The world will know when the truth comes out.

Just in case, though, if it turns out that New Mexico has to serve any jail time, on the lamb, his Ron Mexico Name Generator comes out to "Hank Bosnia." Lam it, young Mexico!

Even LeBron Can't Overshadow Vick's Presence [Atlanta Journal-Constitution]