Fast-Food Smackdown: McDonald's Mozzarella Sticks Vs. Wendy's Bacon Fondue Fries

Cheese trails only corgis and dead British men as a stimulator of exaggerated public devotion. Forgetting for a blessed second the “lactose intolerant” cowards who try to hide dime-store haterism behind their genetics and intestines, we all stand ever ready to declare undying love for good old thickened milk.