The brothers did a phoner with the Riverfront Times to promote their new endeavor and the question, "What other sports blogs do you read?" was asked.

Jason: Those sites tend to be a little – harsh.
Randy: I like the writing i hate the posting. It's sometimes hard to put a piece of original content on.
Randy: I think it'd be the perfect thing for Deadspin. That blog once put up a post about us that was ''Sklars: Funny or Not?'' which kind of set us up for failure from the get-go.

Well, unfortunately, the "Back On Topps" webisodes are not available just yet, but I'm certain the Deadspin readership would be more than willing to give their open and honest opinions about them once they become available.

Q & A With St. Louis' Jason And Randy Sklar [Riverfront Times]

But, according to the Sun, this isn't the first time salaciousness has rocked the placidity of the Rogers Centre (and before that, the Skydome).

Since it opened in 1989, there have been at least three incidents at the hotel where couples were having sex in plain view of tens of thousands of fans, as well as one incident when a man was thrown out of the hotel for masturbating at the window, believing it was one-way glass.

Maybe these types of incidents are what fueled the usually-calm Roy Halladay to excoriate his team?

Topless Woman At Jay's Game [Ottawa Sun]

At least according to the loveable British newspaper The Daily Mail (Some of these images may not be safe for your place of employment. But they're rather tame on the nude-lady-rock-climbing pictorial scale.)The Brit newspaper says, "It is the latest extreme sport craze to sweep the US, and is now tipped to become a popular pastime in the UK."

Yes, this sport is everywhere. I can't go to any park in America without seeing hot naked chicks climbing rocks. It gets so old. For the last time, would all the attractive women please stop climbing rocks without their clothes on?

The Incredible Stone Nudes Who Rock Climb Completely Naked (via SBB)

Stone Nudes [Stone Nudes]

It's been my experience that the only thing more popular in Cincinnati than playing cornhole is going to Kentucky for the night life. For the uninitiated cornhole is an intensely complicated game where you toss bean bags into holes. It's impossible to go to any sporting event in the Midwest or the South and not find people playing. For a day at least cornhole took over Chicago's Soldier Field.

Cue the Pulitzer winning Chicago Tribune, "With a soft thump, Guy's bag dropped through a small hole in the ramp, dragging another yellow bag down with it for a double score."

And the Tribune managed to pin down cornhole enthusiasts as they waxed eloquent on the game. "'It's the sound of summer to me," said Ed O'Sullivan of Mundelein, who closely watched the player he called 'the Tiger Woods of bags' with an awed respect." More? "You’ve got your beer in one hand and your bag in the other—that’s what it’s all about,” said Danny Quiros, 30, of Forest Park.

Yep, Cornhole owes its popularity to the fact that it's impossible to say anything without a double entendre ensuing.

Tossers of all stripes battle in Soldier Field [Chicago Tribune]

Chicago's Soldier Field Host to Cornhole Classic [SportsbyBrooks]

Tomorrow at Wimbledon, keep an eye out for the two weirdos wandering around, freaking people out. Wimbledon isn't the first time the skin-faced duo has popped up at a high-profile event (they were also spotted at Elton John's White Tie ball, and a store opening with Kim Cattrall. Cattrall actually gave the faceless dude a hummer...) , but the reason behind their facelessness is still unknown. The Daily Mail offers up these possibilities:

Theories include the possibilities that they are limelight-seeking pranksters, performance artists or that they are at the centre of a viral marketing campaign for an as-yet unknown product of forthcoming horror film.

Faceless 'aliens' spotted in crowd at Wimbledon [Daily Mail]

Some wisdom from the official site (which even has a song!), about the rules:

We will only be using WAKA's official rules as loose guidelines. For instance, WAKA requires that players kick the ball with their feet. We will allow hobbled zombies to use any intact body part to move the ball - in fact, dismembered parts of other bodies will also be allowed.

Kickball is a simple game consisting of two teams, bases and a big red ball. Played like baseball, the object is to score more runs than the opposing team. Zombie Kickball will play with 11 fielders and 5 innings - base coaches, bouncies, headshots, forced outs, and ghost men are all negotiable. Proper respect and civility will be required of all participants toward one another at all times.

To explain the game:

We love zombies, as you might know. Our favorite zombie movie is "Zombies Vs. Sharks," in which Zombies and Sharks fight each other. The ocean is not an easy environment for zombies to thrive, but dammit, thrive they do.

Most of us who had going-off-to-college parties usually had some dinner with family, maybe a house party with friends, and maybe, if we're lucky, our parents would finally relent and spring for Coors Light party ball to build up our alcohol tolerance enough before we begin five years of chronic binge-drinking.

One proud papa, whose son is headed off to the University of Florida, really wants his going away party to be memorable and visually stimulating for his guests. Courtesy of Sports Oasis (via EDSBS) comes this ad from Craig's List:

I need 4 ladies who don't mind wearing body paint for my sons going off to College Party. There will be a University of Florida theme so you will have UF football uniforms professionally airbrushed on your upper body but you will be wearing blue boy shorts. You will be compensated $100 per hour for serving drinks and finger foods plus any tips you receive. I will take care of the rest, your shorts, meals & transportation if needed. If you are interested please contact me at metrofilmz@yahoo.com and please include photos that demonstrate your figure so I can determine if you have the right look for the party, thanks.

Of course, the original ad has been removed by Craig's List (maybe it was the metrofilmz email address?), but at least the original ad is still intact courtesy of the blogosphere. Nobody should deprive a young man (and his father!) of having a troop of "professionally" airbrushed ladies parade around in boy shorts serving finger food before he heads off to college.

And, seriously, Sterger? You can change allegiances for an afternoon. It's a quick $400 in your pocket.

Mind You: That's Professional Airbrushing [EDSBS]

Just in time for Father's Day, the Hidden Valley golf course in Tennessee is doing some major upkeep on its course like bunker shaping, filling in deep barrancas, aerating and...bomb removal. Yes, hole number five of Hidden Valley had, according to bulldozer driver Freddie McGee, an "old tube-type bomb device" laying nearby and he and another worker damn-near drove o'er it.

"It was pretty serious looking," he [McGee] said. "It would have been bad if one of us had run over it with a dozer, since it is an anti-personnel and has all that shrapnel."

The bomb was located near a home off the golf course. He said he was glad the bomb disposal crew removed the weapon.

"We had to do something," McGee said, "because some kid could have come and kicked it, or taken it home and wiped out a whole family."

McGee also told the paper that his ordeal "gave him insight as to what the men and women in the U.S. military go through every day."

Tonight, let's all say another little prayer for both our troops overseas and, of course, the golf course maintenance workers of Madison County, Tennessee, who also put their lives on the line to ensure our safety.

Bomb found at golf course [Jackson Sun

The reason for this little trip down memory shame is that Michael Jackson extricated himself from whichever alternative Candy Land-like universe he exists to attend last weekend's UFC 84 throwdown. Yes, that shadowy figure wearing the burka and the giant sunglasses trying to remain invisible is Michael Jackson.

Does this help or hurt UFC's image? Either Michael has started taking Brazilian jiu-jitsu lessons on the side or he just really, really enjoys watching shirtless young men crawl all over each other without fear of any kind of legal repercussions.

I choose ... B.

Michael Jackson Loves The UFC [WWTDD]
Michael Jackson Loves UFC, Hates Being Seen [AOL Fanhouse]

It's you against some other fella, for peeing supremacy.

The 'Place to Pee' booth is designed for two users at a time and offers two games — blowing up aliens in outer space or skiing down a virtual slope. Gamers hit their target by aiming at sensors positioned on either side of the urinal.

There's one for ladies, too. We see absolutely no reason this shouldn't be installed in baseball stadium bathrooms everywhere. Heck, you could probably charge people a quarter, like an arcade.

You Can Call This Game Wee-Play [Lion In Oil]

This is actually one of the least brutal ones. Fittingly, Every Day Should Be Saturday and Lt. Winslow contributed to this. We're now scared to leave the house, or drink extra-strong cough syrup.

FootballLOL [The Great Barstoolio]

Not since the heyday of Tiger Woods' difficult attempts to pull off the maneuver have we enjoyed the high five so much. Keep trying, America! It'll never look natural!

More importantly, before the dance, you better watch out for some over-eager boys dropping their pants in an effort to creatively invite girls to the prom. That's exactly what happened to Huron High School senior Carolyn Campbell— and those boys paid for it.:

Kristoff Wennersten figured his prom proposal had to be one-of-a-kind if it would have any chance of being accepted.

But the Huron High School senior never imagined it would result in a suspension for himself and 12 of his varsity lacrosse teammates, whom he recruited to help spell out the message at a school soccer match via their derrieres.

The players displayed the question, "Will You Go To The Prom With Me? Yes or No?" on their posteriors while mooning Huron senior Carolyn Campbell at a game.

If anything, this should give some would-be grooms a great idea for how to propose to their future brides.

Lacrosse Players Are Romantic [With Leather]

Kallenbach died today in a Chester County hospital after complications from pneumonia. He became sick while in prison, serving out part of a sentence for either a DUI or attempting to lure an underage girl into his car. So, he had his problems.

Say a little prayer for the troubled idiots of the world tonight, as they've lost one of their most esteemed members. But they can take solace that Kenneth Keith and Hank The Angry Dwarf will look over them forever.

Kenneth Keith Kallenbach In ESPN Monday Night Football Commercial [YouTube]
"Mike Schmidt" Comedy Sketch [Kenneth Keith's MySpaceTV]

In Brazil, well, that shit happens all the time. And sometimes, it ends tragically.

Roman Catholic Rev. Adelir Antonio de Carli has been missing since Sunday, when he lifted off from the port city of Paranagua wearing a helmet, an aluminum thermal flight suit, waterproof coveralls and a parachute. He was seeking to break a record for the longest time in-flight with helium-filled party balloons.

Sometimes life is just one big Benny Hill episode. And, yes, those are his balloons that were found floating in the ocean. Somebody better grab them before some seagulls choke.

Hope For Finding Brazilian Priest Deflates [NY Post]

Don't you go Hollywood, Jake.

Jake Long Is The First Pick Of The Guitar Hero Draft [Don Chavez]

"At that pace the pitcher would have thrown around 500 pitches in four innings," Kawamoto's coach was quoted as saying. "There was a danger he could get injured."

Yes. He's not sadistic. And the humiliation of being a high school pitcher who gave up 66 runs in two innings should wear off sometime in the next 30 years anyway.

Hey, whatever happened to that Most Extreme Elimination Challenge show on Spike TV anyway?

250 Pitch Count = Totally Cool. 500 Pitch Count = Probably Not Good. [FanIQ]

Of course, these jerseys will be on the racks at Philly-area Modell's Sporting Goods within the next week. Just in time for prom season.

Stephen Colbert Attempts to 'Tongue the Crack of Liberty' [The 700 Level]

First it's Romo's karaoke showcase, then it's the ESPN hip-hop throwdown, then Vegas, now this. This guy is like Zelig.

The organization which owns the new hockey and arena league teams has already applied for rights to use "Walleye" and "Woodpecker," both of which are indigenous to Ohio, but only one of which could really injure someone if they peck their little beak in your eye. (Hint: it's not the walleye. Good guess, though.)

But county commissioner Ben Konop, despite his boyish good looks, is not at all amused at the thought of the Toledo Woodpeckers. Why? I don't understand the objection.

These are the people's teams and the people's arena, and the public has spoken—woodpeckers not welcome in Lucas County!

I for one welcome the woodpecker to Northwest Ohio to be the mascot for our hockey and/or arena league team, and hope that... wait a minute... OH! I get it now. It's a penis joke.

Konop Files Objections To Suggested Team Names [Toledo Blade]
No Woodpecker In Lucas County [Ben Konop's Blog]

The pic was taken by his ex girlfriend around halloween. Those shorts he has on are his work out shorts, the shirt..his girlfriends (Who is a cheerleader for the Indy Colts). They just had a bad break up and viola' the pics end up all over the internet. One thing is for sure, the pic looks suspect as hell...BUT...he isnt gay. I know Kenny personally we dated for almost 2 years and he is always that ashy lol. Thats why you cant let people take questionable pics of you when you are in that kind of position.

See, he's not gay, he just fucked with a kinky cheerleader who happens to own a camera. It happens to the best of us.

Also worth considering is the input of commenter, *Breaker_1_9*...

That is still suspect tho....I would never let my man wear my draws. I don't want him shedding his ball hairs where I put my vajayjay. That's just unsanitary.

A commenter reminded me of the classic KSK post involving Kenny Irons, a suitcase, and a dick sucking midget.

Jackson County sheriff's deputies were called to a Nicholson home early Thanksgiving morning after a 43-year-old woman knocked her husband unconscious with a potato during an argument, according to sheriff's reports. The woman told deputies that she and her husband started to argue in the kitchen about 1 a.m. Nov. 22. He had used an expletive to describe her, and she threw the potato at him, hitting him in the nose and causing him to pass out, deputies said. The couple told deputies that they been drinking.

Fortunately it was only a Red Pontiac; had it been a Russet Burbank, we'd be talking about murder.

Pitched Potato Knocks Out Husband [Athens Banner-Herald]

Well, 100 Percent Injury Rate has dug up more videos of Mr. Testicle in action. Can we create him as a Madden character? The problem is that he's so good at sports now that he's pressured to improve and keep up with the rest of his competitors. That's all fine and good, of course, except that leads to steroids which, ironically, makes his whole body shrink.

Mr. Testicles Is Surprisingly Athletic [100 Percent Injury Rate]
You Should See The Portion Of The Costume That Fell Off During Mile 3 [Deadspin]

This is a warsaw grouper weighing 359.1 pounds, and it's a real fish, one that came from the waters of Louisiana. Again, we're not sure if it is classified as "sports," but man, we're not too comfortable living in a world in which fish can grow to 359 pounds. Heck, that thing could pitch for the Indians at this rate.

If I Showed You, I'd Have To Kill You [The Sports Oasis]

Indisturbance: Avoid disquieting surrounding bystanders and inanimate objects while leisure jousting. Do not engage in finger jousting matches at inappropriate settings or during inappropriate times.

Manicure: Taking care of your fingernails is a sign of respect for your opponent and shows an interest in maintaining a healthy body.

We recommend you check out the whole set of rules, and then start your own league today. If we can get together a group of finger jousters who can rival No. 3 world ranked Josh "Darth Bob" Kinder, Deadspin will happily sponsor a team.

Official Finger Jousting Rules [FingerJoust]
I Will Joust You With My Finger, Bitch [Deadspin]

Off topic, you say? Not if you're Joey Chestnut, or a sumo wrestler. Or, say, these guys. And with Free Taco Day coming up, Super Colon will be more relevant than ever.

Giant Colon Raises Cancer Awareness [Tahoe Daily Tribune]
Our Visit To The Hot Dog Eating Championships [Deadspin]

• What was George Washington's wife's name?
• Which are blood vessels? A. Tibias, B. Scalias, C. Capillaries.
• Bavaria is a state in what country? (Chris said Poland)
• How many pounds in a ton?
• True or false: The official language of Australia is English.

The show's format allows actual fifth-graders to bail out the contestants, which they did with Chris up until the final question, where he dropped out ... with winnings of $175,000. Miss Teen South Carolina would be proud. And the Iraq, such as.

Rockies-Diamondbacks? That's started already?

Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader? [Fox]

(Getty Images Photo)

The only way a corndog could be improved upon, we'd think, would be if they could make it erotic. Sadly, some Iowans disagree.

The erotic corn dog-eating contest at the Iowa State Fair might have to go away. The competition, which is organized by a Des Moines area radio station and tends to draw a raucous and appreciative crowd, is too tasteless, according to at least one fair board member.

After the topic came up Monday during the board's critique of this year's state fair, fair manager Gary Slater said he hasn't seen it himself. "I just heard it was kind of disgusting," Slater said. He quickly added: "It was nothing that was sanctioned by the fair."

Hey, Barack Obama? John Edwards? You guys really want to catch up with Hillary? You're gonna have to win Iowa, which means you have to go by the erotic corndog eating contest. Sure, you might find it beneath your dignity, but politics, it's a tough racket.

Fair Board May Banish Erotic Corndog Eating Contest [Des Moines Register]

Anyway, Seattle has a new trolley (or streetcar, or whatever), and it has a rather unfortunate acronym.

Officially it's the South Lake Union Streetcar, but people in the Cascade neighborhood who are fed up with construction noise and detours have come up with a name that's a little more provocative.
Instead of a streetcar, they're using the word trolley, and also the acronym "SLUT."

Again, no sports angle, but ... well, you could also take the SLUT to the Seahawks game. We love it when Mariner Moose rides the SLUT.

Seattle Trolley Line Has Acronym SLUT [KTVB]

Because, seriously, setting up the table and those cups has always been so damned exhausting.

Video game publisher Midway has a new game coming out for the Wii system. "Party Game" will consist of several games including shuffleboard, darts, and ski ball, but the game that will take over college campuses this fall is Wii beer pong. Or Wii Beirut. Or "Ping Cup" as Midway refers to it:

The object of ping cup is to use the Wii remote to throw a ping-pong ball at a pyramid of cups.

Now, if they can just get that thing set up with an IV, we'll be all set.

Consuming With Wii [You Been Blinded]

For those not in the know, the head is a vital body part in any sport, especially one as brutal as soccer. Not only can the head be used to direct the ball toward the goal (or open teammates), but it also houses the nerves which control a human's motor skills. To compensate for this, Dejagah relies on a series of electroshock pads controlled by his doctor, combined with the Earth's gravity, to control the football.

Speaking of missing heads, know who else functions without one? You guessed it. Miss South Carolina.

germany_soccer_bundesliga_wob112 [Yahoo! Sports]

This is a blog site- not a cyber-court!
YOU CAN'T FIX STUPID
SING ALONG.
How much is that doggy in the fight pit,
the one with the waggerly tail,

They do,
unlike snakes,
have distinct personalities
and
(unlike children)
will always
give you unconditional
love.

-Holly (Magnolia if you're nasty)

(UPDATE: The great Twoeightnine offers up an alternative version that makes more sense, after the jump.)