Torre, who described watching the Yankees in Fall Classic as "surreal," is tickled pink that the Yankees won the World Series. He is especially happy for Alex Rodriguez and manager Joe Girardi.

"To watch what they've done, especially with Joe Girardi at the helm, it really made me feel good," Torre said. "Even though I am supposed to be a National League fan, when you're as close to these guys as I've been all these years, well, I was just really pleased for them."

I don't know, I'm not buying it. Wouldn't it make more sense for Torre to be resentful about the Yankees pulling it off without him at the helm? On the other hand, perhaps all that yoga and New Age bullcrap Torre is into now that he lives in Los Angeles allows him to look at it from a more positive perspective. What do you mean Torre is probably not into yoga? That State Farm commercial was totally real, right?

Joe Torre: Watching Joe Girardi, Yankees win World Series was 'surreal' [New York Daily News]

No other player has been so afflicted with the terrible pop psychology of sportswriters as Alex Rodriguez, and even now that he's just won the championship that he was supposedly too selfish and inner-directed to win, Rodriguez is being subjected to yet more inane psychologizing. Here's Ronald Blum of the Associated Press:

But this was a new A-Rod, liberated and transformed in his 16th big league season. Finally starting to grow up at age 34, he shed the distractions caused by his $275 million contract and an entourage of handlers he picked up from Madonna. He glowed in his relationship with new girlfriend Kate Hudson.

Ted Keith of SI.com:

If the legacies of Derek Jeter, Mariano Rivera, Andy Pettitte and Jorge Posada were crystallized by their fifth world title, then in winning his first, Rodriguez's was transformed. He may still be slightly vain — a centaur? Really? — and may still be highly ambitious, but he has undoubtedly acquired a new level of humility that, in fairness, may have been hard to come by as he was performing like the best player in the world (winning three MVP awards in five seasons) and being paid like it (signing not one but two contracts in excess of a quarter-billion dollars just seven years apart).

That transformation began with his much-dissected press conference, but the real impetus for change came a few weeks later when he went to lunch with some friends of his and heard them "tell me a lot of things that I needed to hear," he says. "I listened and I humbled myself. I look in the mirror and I was honest with myself and I didn't like what I saw."

This all makes for a pleasant story arc — ooh! he's having another moment in front of a mirror — but it's nonsense, and one day, Rodriguez will have a good chuckle over it while polishing his World Series ring. Does anyone really believe he went .365/.500/.808 because he located some new wellspring of humility? Or because he shed those infamous "distractions," stopped counting his money and fetched up with a more PG-13 celebrity? He hit .365/.500/.808 because he's one of the greatest hitters of his generation, Kate Hudson or no.

Consider: As a regular, A-Rod has now figured in 11 playoff series; by my reckoning, he played poorly in only three of them. In the others, he was good, if not brilliant: .409/.480/.773 for Seattle in the 2000 ALCS against the Yankees; .421/.476/.737 with the Yankees in the 2004 ALDS against the Twins. He very nearly went 0-for-Detroit in 2006, but otherwise, even discounting his supposed Great Awakening this season, Rodriguez has enjoyed the sort of postseason success that the Mike Lupicas of the world are usually so quick to label "clutch." That they never did was probably out of fealty to the public image of a wealthy, sybaritic loser that they had so laboriously constructed for A-Rod. But he was great before, and he was great again, and the only transformation that took place was in the imaginations of those sportswriters who never tire of assigning moral value to things that happen in a baseball game.

A-Rod finally a champion after year of turmoil [AP]
From steroids to celebrations, what a year it's been for Alex Rodriguez [SI.com]

* * * * *

Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Barry's back tonight, and I'm sure he'll have some pleasant and totally sufferable thoughts to share about the World Series.

Rose handled postgame duty last night, baffling the Yankees with a series of unanswerable questions, like the zen koan he threw at Derek Jeter — "Jeets," he called him — about GPS devices or something. It was a command performance. For a brief moment, he made Chip Caray look like Red Barber. On Twitter, Rose was deemed ...

... LAME

... weird

... awful

... crappy

... terrible

... absolutely terrible

... corny

... sooooo damn CORNY

... a tool

... such a tool

... such a moron

... a dufus

... a douchebag

... a fuckin d-bag

... a bit of a goofball

... a total ass whip

... one of the worst post game and pre game analysts!!!

... gunning for razzie as worst championship post-game celebration presenter

... a grease fire as an anchor/reporter

... just as worthless and annoying as Buck and McCarver

... the worst thing Fox has ever produced

That's right. Worse than The $treet. I will borrow from Caray here: Chris Rose, you've just been fisted.

Photo via The New York Times

EARLIER: Fisting Chip Caray

It looks like all those newspaper layoffs have hit the New York media pretty hard, because every outlet in the city was forced to share the same headline today. And judging by a scan of stories from across the country, whoever wrote it was very busy last night. They had nine years to come up with something and this was all they could think of?

(By the way, as of 8:45 this morning, only Yahoo had adjusted their website. You guys know how the internet works, right? Unfortunately, the Post, Daily News and Newsday headlines are forever emblazoned on today's front page.)

Actually, this is exactly the correct amount of inspiration that yet another Yankee championship should generate. Congrats, Bombers, on a job ... done.

[Thanks to commenter Mickey Sabbath for catching the Yahoo page]

* * * * *

Thursday. I offer this begrudging tribute to all the Yankee fans who woke up in a drunk tank this morning.

"Six years later, he is back in new Yankee Stadium, still pitching for the honor of Red Sox Nation," Shaughnessy begins. He means Pedro Martinez, who is fated to spend the rest of his natural days being trailed by a herd of Back Bay poet manqués, even though he has now pitched for five teams in all, four of which were not the Red Sox.

Pedro Martinez gets the ball in Game 6 tonight of the World Series, and he is the only thing standing between the Evil Empire and its 27th world championship.

In his role as Philadelphia Phillies starting pitcher, Pedro knows he is carrying the colors for Sox fans around the world - just as he did in 2003 when Grady Little left him on the mound too long in the ancient ballpark across the street.

And the curly-haired boyfriend concludes:

The Yankees were Pedro's daddy when Grady left him on the mound too long in 2003. Tonight Pedro has a chance to make everything right. All these years later, he's still pitching for the Red Sox.

Yes, at last, a second shot at redemption (after that first, successful shot at redemption in 2004). This one's not just for Pedro, either. It's for all of Red Sox Nation, those long-suffering souls who've tragically gone a full month without anyone giving a shit about them.

A night at the theater [Boston Globe, via Can't Stop The Bleeding]

* * * * *

Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Barry won't be here tonight, but remember, you can always entertain yourselves merely by using the handy #duan hashtag. Talk about baseball, threaten to sue, whatever.

I appreciate that this Philly fan wanted to honor the FCC's truth in advertising statutes, but I'm not sure if it was really necessary. Alex Rodriguez knows what he is. Still, it may have been just enough of a distraction to hold the slugger to only 3 RBI and force the Yankees to try and win the World Series in their fancy new stadium. Just one or two more World Series games and they can finally pay that thing off.

And I guess Cliff Lee and Chase Utley helped a little too. You're not getting off that easy, baseball fans.

* * * * *

It's Tuesday and I guess this thing isn't ever ending. Yankee baseball players are always on the TV, but what can I do?

First pitch is in an hour or so. Please use this as your open thread. A new era of Yankee exceptionalism begins presently. I can't wait!

Photo by Stephanie Wei

* * * * *

Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin.

Our first repeat winner, but it's hard to argue that he doesn't deserve it since he's finally earning a lifetime of $250 million contracts in one shortlong month. ("The New Mr. October and New Mr. November!") After Games 1 and 2 of the World Series (0-8, 6 Ks) it looked like all his post-season "failures" were coming back to haunt him once again. Then, with the Yankees in trouble in Game 3, he bounces one off a camera to start the rally and then comes up with another huge hit—under pressure even!—to give himself the game-winning RBI in Game 4. Plus, he got hit by a pitch three times in two days, because intentional walks just aren't rough enough for this guy.

You know what? I'm just going to say it. If there's anyone on the planet who can get away with hanging a painting of himself depicted as a mighty centaur over his bed, it's Alex Rodriguez. He's got True Yankee coming out of his ... well, everywhere.

Alex Rodriguez earns "true Yankee' status [Allentown Morning Call]
A-Rod all about quality, not quantity in Series [Daily News]
The 2009 MLB Season Has Belonged To A-Rod [Rumors and Rants]
Cashing in with the best team that money can buy [AP]
Matthews: A-Rod is now a postseason powerhouse [Newsday]

* * * * *

Here are some other big winners, who did not win quite as big:

Johnny Damon: The real hero last night, Damon got a huge hit off Brad Lidge then stole two bases to set up A-Rod's big moment. Didn't he used to play in Rhode Island or something?

Vince Young: By waiting until his team played a very beatable Jacksonville squad (and until the Titans' season was pretty much over) to work his way into the starting lineup, Vince Young looks like a hero again. It was a very sane and mentally balanced performance. [The Tennessean]

Ted Ginn: Two 100-yard kickoff returns and 299 total kick return yards after not being allowed to start the game at WR. Obviously, he's much too valuable to be allowed to play offense. Also, I think the Jets might have some concerns on special teams. [Star-Ledger]

Unidentified Minnesota Quarterback: Yeah, yeah. I know.

Texas Longhorns: UT leapt over Alabama in the polls and the BCS simply because the Tide took the week off. Pussies. [AP]

U.S.A.! U.S.A.!: For the first time in 27 years, the NYC Marathon was won by a goddamn red-blooded American. (Who was born in Eritrea.) We will take that. [New York Times]

And the Weekend Loser?: The Oakland Raiders Receiving Corps. Just the way they drew it up.

After last night's base stealing extravaganza, Johnny Damon is feeling pretty good about himself. Good enough to revive his devilish tongue salute with Nick Swisher. Although I suppose it never really went away, did it?

Can they finally lick it up tonight? And by "it", I of course mean a big bowl of chocolate ice cream that they are eating in celebration of another Yankee championship. I know you're giddy from anticipation, but try to contain yourselves.

[Photo: AP]

* * * * *

More on the game in a bit. It's Monday morning. We've got a lot to cover today so do what you can to cancel your meetings. Priorities, people.

In the cleverly-titled column, "City of Brotherly Love? My butt!", Wells hits all the main points one desires to touch on when ripping on Philadelphia ("It's not Brotherly Love in that town - it's Brotherly Hate." - zing!), although to his credit, he managed to show some restraint and refrained from discussing how Philadelphians once booed and threw snowballs at Santa. He does not, however, quell any stereotypes regarding the typical Philly fan, so apparently, the Yankees - and any broadcaster, for that matter - better be ready for the onslaught.

Wells relays a story about how fans called Cal Ripken a homo when the TBS baseball studio crew were doing a broadcast from Citizens Bank Park during the playoffs.

When I was in Philadelphia earlier this postseason with Cal Ripken Jr., Dennis Eckersley and Ernie Johnson for TBS, we got booed. We were just doing our show out in center field and people were walking by saying "You fat piece of [bleep]. . . . Tell Cal he's gay. . . . Ernie Johnson sucks."

I'm like, "Who the hell are these people?" We've got no part of baseball.

We're doing the game and TBS stuff and these Phillies fans are just f-bombing us to death.

How dare they, right? Wells does maintain that there are "true good fans in Philly who are respectable and do the right thing," the bad apples "take away from the good fans they have there, because I think Philadelphia does have some good fans." Aw, that's nice. I'm sure the residents of Philadelphia who aren't mouth-breathing mongoloids appreciate his deference.

Overall, it isn't a bad column given that I didn't even know that David Wells knew how to read, let alone write. I'm thinking Pulitzer!

City of Brotherly Love? My butt! [New York Post]

But this will all settle down (hopefully) and we'll get back to doing the usual routine, barring some other game-changing element beyond our control. Some things of note:

* Deleted Scenes didn't run this week because most of the stuff we received was still post-horndoggery backlash. This happens sometimes. Next week, it'll be back and there will hopefully be some other items of tenuous news value and preposterous rumors that will be entertaining for you. This week, I spared you more of this:

It's pretty sad how you are handling this situation with ESPN. Why is it your responsibility to tell people that a guy had an affair? It's not like Phillips is a high profile person at ESPN. They might have a lot of problems at ESPN but they aren't cheating the people. They aren't taking my life-savings and destroying my life. Why don't you report the rock bands that have the same things go on behind the scenes of their shows? Or the athletes that are constantly cheating on their wives? It seems like you want to pick on ESPN because they are bigger and more successful than you are, which is sad.
Jeff Lewis (Shanghai, China)

Thanks, Jeff.

* FAILgate is failing. Miserably. So I'm just gonna wrap that sucker up on Monday and award the winner a Deadspin prize pack, which will consist of a whole bunch of books and other stuff. Maybe there's something of value in it for somebody. It's time to get some new features in here anyway.

* I'm headed to Game 3 tomorrow night. So I'll be back in Philly. Most likely, Ill be at the Locust Bar at some point to help fill up those ashtrays. BUT — if anyone has anyway possible of getting me into the Spectrum so I can watch Pearl Jam close that place down once and for all, I'd be forever in your debt. A Saturday night of Phillies/Yankees followed by Pearl Jam is like my Make A Wish Foundation Weekend. Doesn't anyone work security there or anything? If you have a solution, you know where to find me.

*Moving forward: This site's changing. Rapidly. Growing, etc. Some people may think we've completely headed violently in a direction that's going to forever tarnish the good name of Deadspin and, ahem, "Sports Blogging" forever. I disagree. Wholeheartedly. I'm here to make things interesting for you, the reader. You do your thing, we'll do ours. This site has enough voices and perspectives and non-despicable elements that my minimal posting does not undermine one bit. If you want straight "sports" well, shit, there are plenty of other quality publications that can offer pithy opinions on Those Games From Last Night. Hugs. xoxoxo.

Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Weed Against Speed is back for Saturday, Barry for Sunday. Go Phils.

While not quite as egregious as some of the earlier gaffes from this postseason, the two mistakes only take us one step closer on the march to full instant replay reviews. It was a close, bang-bang play but TV showed that Chase Utley was clearly safe at first on the back end of an eighth-inning double play. (Even blatant Yankee fans say so.) A correct call by first base ump Brian Gorman would have given Philly runners at first and third for the next Ryan Howard strikeout, but it still affected the way the later innings played out.

The first goof was a much tougher call, but it did appear that Johnny Damon's line dive skipped off the dirt before landing in Ryan Howard's glove in the seventh. I say "appear," because even though most commentators* agreed with that take the umpires would not admit they were wrong (Gorman was out of position to see it, but could have been overruled by another ump) and the replay was close enough to leave some doubt. That is the great fallacy of instant replay, of course. In the sports that do have it, referees still botch calls on a regular basis—even after looking at the video tape—so the idea that replays will get everything right is laughable.

So both teams got screwed and it probably wouldn't have changed the final outcome, but an expansion of instant replay in baseball is now inevitable. Enjoy that.

Umpires miss two calls in Game 2 of Series [ABC]
Enough is enough with these blown calls [Yahoo]
Umpires botch 'close' call to end eighth [NY Post]

* * * * *

*The only people who saw no problem with these calls were the Baseball Tonight crew, who suddenly became apologists for bad officiating. First of all, why is Berman even there? Karl Ravech owns the sport all year long, but then Fat Head McGee decides to show up for the World Series to annoy us all to death. (I would never use the word "hate" about another human ... but man do I hate that guy. Like a sickness.) Listen as he, John Kruk and Bobby Valentine pretend there's no reason whatsoever to dispute these calls.

"As good as a call" as he could have made? No, actually I can think of a better call. Like the correct one. Jackasses.

Philly fan who came up for the game? Want to drown your tears in a bottle? Have we got the deal for you:

Hotel Indigo NYC Chelsea, the boutique chain's newly opened first New York City location is celebrating the Yankees entry into the World Series with a special deal for Philadelphians! In anticipation of your misery, the hotel is ready to cheer you up with its "Drown Your Sorrows" champagne promotion. Here's how it works: Book a room for the night of any World Series 2009 game with the Phillies playing at Yankee Stadium. If – as expected – the Phillies lose, then present your ticket stub at the front desk showing your attendance at the game, along with a valid drivers license proving your address in the city of Philadelphia (and that you are 21 or over!). You will then receive a complimentary bottle of Perrier-Jouet champagne to help ease your pain.

Eat it, Daulerio. Or should I say, drink it?

Line up changes for tonight. We have a Matt Stairs sighting! He'll DH for Philly. For the Yankees, Swisher and Posada are out, Hairston and Molina (to catch Burnett) are in. Fortunately for New York, their opponent also has to replace Cliff Lee and his magic glove. Pedro Martinez gets one more chance to take down the hated Yankees before he's cast out into the Atlantic on a flaming barge.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN? WHO WILL PREVAIL? WILL I HAVE ENOUGH NACHOS TO LAST PAST THE SIXTH INNING! I can't wait to find out the answers. Especially the nachos one.

[Photo by reader Brian B.]

* * * * *

I would rather starve than eat your pizza rolls. Barry P. is on deck with some designated hitting of his own. Thanks you for you continued support Peter King's trainer.

I don't know about you, but my favorite place to get fired up before any big game is the McDonald's in Pennsville, NJ. You know the one. Not only do they have way better fries than the ones across the river in Delaware, but there are always celebrities hanging out there. And because it's McDonald's, they aren't going to give you a lot attitude because ... McDonald's is awesome! You can't not have fun there!

Remind me to tell you about the time Mayor McCheese drank my milkshake. Drank it right up.

Pennsville McDonald's Phillies Pep Rally! [NJ.com]

* * * * *

Oh, gosh it's Thursday isn't it? How will we ever make it through?

There's no point in previews or predictions at this stage (I think there will be at least four games ... and three groin pulls) so just go ahead and open thread your brains out below. Angry rants and trash talk are more than welcome, but anyone who says "an A-bomb from A-Rod!" is automatically banned. Now go get some.

[Photo: Getty]

* * * * *

Barry P. will have some other nonsense for you later. Thank you for your continued support of the Deadspin Dream Factory.

It happens four times a year. The papers in the two cities facing off for the championship in any sport will, without fail, run a column bashing their counterpart. It's often about food, or landmarks, or celebrities, but it's a given that none of it is sports-related in the least. Let's take a look at the NY-Philly catfight.

•The New York Post started the day off with a doozy of a cover, but the accompanying story is pretty weak. The usual platitudes about Philadelphia being small and their fans boorish abound.
Best line: "Philly fans are a bunch of whiners and should learn how to dress. They should try reading GQ."

•The Philadelphia Inquirer gets surprisingly offensive, devoting an article to picking holes in the Post's story. It even takes the time to point out that those probably aren't really Shane Victorino's legs on the cover.
Best line: "Check out the [Post's] 'evidence' in a story that, apparently, took three people to write."

•The New York Daily News takes the "aww, aren't they precious" tact, and belittles Philadelphians' confidence. They call the Phanatic a "pig-nosed monster" and actually use the term "Sillydelphia."
Best line: "What makes this city of 109 neighborhoods - with names like Germantown, Fishtown and Swamp Poodle - unafraid?"

•Stuck in neutral territory, the Newark Star-Ledger goes the tried-and-true "this thing from this city vs. this thing from that city" route. Comparisons of local delicacies, noted figures (historic and fictional) and even accents are arbitary and stereotypical enough to offend both sides.
Best line: "Every March 17, green puke runs down Fifth Avenue. Every Jan. 1, soused Mummers at least have the decency to puke into their satin parasols."

•Even the Associated Press gets in on the fun. It's a mostly dry breakdown of how the cities match up, alongside a photo of Philadelphia's mayor do-si-do-ing with the Phanatic.
Best line: "The Yankees and Phillies have never been real rivals. New York has a record 26 World Series titles and the Statue of Liberty; Philadelphia has two and a statue of 'Rocky.'"

While I didn't highlight it, rest assured that every single article prominently mentioned cheesesteaks. What's that, Deadspin readers? You're from the rest of the country and don't give a crap about this showdown? Carry on, then.