http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/deadspin.com.png http://deadspin.com/tag/thanksgiving http://deadspin.com/tag/thanksgiving

Jason Gay has compiled the handiest of handy guides at the WSJ today: "The 32 Rules of Thanksgiving Touch Football." If you wanna be the Kennedys, you've gotta study up. A sample: "7. No footballs with wings or propellers or tails or streamers. Here's a good rule: If the football would make Dick Butkus throw up, don't use it." [WSJ] More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5861492&view=rss&microfeed=true

That's seven straight losses for Detroit on Turkey Day, and don't expect them to lose the Thursday slot any time soon. At the very least, maybe the league could schedule them for a high school homecoming game. [Where's Weems] More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5699598&view=rss&microfeed=true

This had all the makings of a "marquee" match-up but now it's a showcase for Dez Bryant to solidify himself as the second Best Football Player In The Universe Ever. More memorable Cowboy Turkey Day games are listed here. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5699121&view=rss&microfeed=true

This could be one of those 50-10 Thanksgiving blowouts the Lions have semi-traditionally served-up for turkey-banging America, but in this kooky NFL season, Shaun Hill could have the game of his life. Yell about all the pre-feast drama, right here. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5699119&view=rss&microfeed=true

Since the end of this week will be pretty much kickoff Party Time In America, please help us fill your off-days with something good. You could win prizes and shit! More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5696700&view=rss&microfeed=true

Everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like anyone who had a brined turkey and tasty, tasty sweet potatoes yesterday. And was lucky enough to have leftovers today. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5413870&view=rss&microfeed=true

The National Enquirer has been tailing a 34-year-old NYC woman whom they claim is having a dirty affair with Eldrick. They even have pictures of her in Australia checking into the same hotel as him. Brilliant MediaTakeout commenters respond accordingly. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5413048&view=rss&microfeed=true

So as most of you may know, this is shortened week for most Americans so we can all solemnly commemorate the death of turkeys and indigenous people at the hands of white men wearing buckles on their hats. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5411166&view=rss&microfeed=true

Daulerio: More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5099515&view=rss&microfeed=true

Last year, we ran a Thanksgiving edition of the NFL Jamboroo the day before Thanksgiving. But we're gonna forgo that this year and run the Jamboroo early tomorrow morning. Why? Well, for one thing, there isn't fucking jack SHIT to do on Thanksgiving morning. You watch the parade for two minutes, you offer to help your mom cook even though you don't actually want to help, you set your fantasy lineup, you masturbate after sleeping in, then lay in bed for another fifteen minutes so you can masturbate a second time. It's a real black hole in an otherwise awesome day. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5099254&view=rss&microfeed=true I have to hand it to you Americans; you guys do a real good job of stretching a one-day holiday out to about a week. Haven't some of you been off since, like, Monday? Incredible. But seriously now; you can't possibly be drinking eggnog during Thanksgiving can you? Can you!? I'm so confused. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=326077&view=rss&microfeed=true

Prepare for this exact scene tomorrow: Brett Favre eating turkey and receiving backslaps on the Lions' home field. (We're not sure, but we believe this picture was taken in 1983.) More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=325436&view=rss&microfeed=true

Well, we figure most of you have skipped out of the office for the long weekend, so we figured we might as well do the same; it's off for Thanksgiving for us now. We were considering doing one of those "We're Thankful For ..." stories, that pointed out all the Crazy and Wacky things in the world of sports, but then we realized that every newspaper in the country probably had that covered. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=216751&view=rss&microfeed=true