The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree - Deadspin Comments

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 20:48:43 EDT

How could that newspaper produce that list, but not include the '82 Stanford-Cal game?

But I love the Stanford band. The uniform is a piece of a band uniform. Some where the hats, others the pants,....

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

TattooedMess(iah) — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 19:21:11 EDT

I think the more apt quote here would be "Make like a tree...and get the fuck out!"

Oh, Boondock Saints, how I wish they'd just make the second fucking movie already.

TattooedMess(iah)

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

shamu the whale — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 16:33:11 EDT

Newspaper had a rundown of past incidents involving the Stanford Band a couple days ago. Witness:

1986: The band is suspended for two games after some members drop their pants and others urinate on the field during the halftime show at a game against the University of Washington.

1991: In a game against Notre Dame, a band member dressed as a nun conducts the band using a crucifix for a baton. Notre Dame bans the band indefinitely.

2004: At Brigham Young University, the band's five dancers wear wedding veils in a parody of polygamy.

shamu the whale

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Jubilation T. Cornpone — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 14:48:53 EDT

I was at the PAC 10 Men's Tournament two years ago and the tree got tossed out for harassing some people in the stands. Tree's out of control.

But the Stanford Dollies, they were fun to watch.

Jubilation T. Cornpone

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

diddly — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 14:40:26 EDT

So Insomniac, you're saying that the tree was probably drunk on firewater?

diddly

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

RectumDamnNearKilledEm — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 14:39:52 EDT

I'd like to punch that tree right in the mouth.

RectumDamnNearKilledEm

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

jane — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 13:27:32 EDT

Their mascot should obviously be a Cardinal, and by that I mean a high ranking official in the Catholic church who hates women and loves altar boys.

jane

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Footsteps Falco — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 12:46:33 EDT

Honestly all I did was screw up while posting but if a few kids walk away today with an unintended math lesson then I guess it was worth it.

Footsteps Falco

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

insomniac — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 12:35:38 EDT

Muggsy- In Stanford's case, "Cardinal" doesn't refer to the bird, but rather the color cardinal, which is known in the Crayola world as "pretentious red." Stanford used to be known as the Indians until the 70s when it was deemed offensive to American Indians.

Without the Indian mascot, it was been up to the tree (which is not an official mascot) to carry on the tradition of drunkeness throughout the campus.

insomniac

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

MJ — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 12:20:11 EDT

If so, what will replace it? A bush?

Screw it, just make it a furburger and get it over with.

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

TheStarterWife — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 12:09:58 EDT

If a tree gets drunk on gin, is that considered cannibalism?

TheStarterWife

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

diddly — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 12:06:25 EDT

These are the kinds of mixups that happen when you get shitfaced every day of your life

diddly

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

muggsybogues — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:54:55 EDT

anyone else unsure as to why the Stanford Cardinal mascot isn't, oh, I don't know, a fucking cardinal?

muggsybogues

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Jen P — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:50:42 EDT

For some reason, I find the idea of a tree getting drunk off PineSol incredibly funny.

Jen P

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Matt Sussman — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:45:06 EDT

The fact that I was excited to use a Riemann sum in a post today probably says a lot about my place in the social ladder.

Matt Sussman

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

TheStarterWife — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:43:21 EDT

That or he's British.

This is the band mascot. Band mascot. Band. Mascot.

No matter how many times I say it, it does not make any sense to me.

TheStarterWife

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Ted Striker — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:41:21 EDT

I'm just thinking about how emotionally scarring it would be to have a tree projectile vomit on you.

Ted Striker

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Spaceman Bill Leah needs a full-length puffy coat — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:41:14 EDT

Great, thanks Deadspin for ending my successful run of proving to my high school math teachers that I will never, ever, under any condition need to know what that crap all stands for.

Spaceman Bill Leah needs a full-length puffy coat

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Matt Sussman — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:31:31 EDT

Denton must have something against Greek letters. Most likely pantsed during rush week.

Matt Sussman

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

silver lining — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:29:55 EDT

Again with the no symbols! Thos were supposed to be deltas.

silver lining

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

silver lining — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:29:30 EDT

Îvodka/Ît = hung over on a Monday

silver lining

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Matt Sussman — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:28:43 EDT

I think the lesson here is that too much vodka makes mathematical symbols actually look like Ã¢ÂÂÂ

Matt Sussman

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:28:28 EDT

are math jokes the new haiku?

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Gordon Bombay — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:26:50 EDT

man, that a looking thing I wrote would have been much more awesome if it was what I had actually intended to put. Screw these math jokes.

Gordon Bombay

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Gordon Bombay — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:25:33 EDT

Hilarity â Sobriety

Gordon Bombay

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

bigboneded — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:24:56 EDT

Fuck the Furd.

Go Bears.

(Watch out for those Aggies you cardinal bitches!)

bigboneded

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Matt Sussman — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:22:59 EDT

Nuts to gum, the sigma character didn't show up.

Matt Sussman

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Matt Sussman — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:22:27 EDT

n
â hilarity = hilarityÂ² + 3*hilarity
i=hilarity

Matt Sussman

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Moonshine Mike — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:21:13 EDT

people have games at your bar diddly? not just "how many can i pound before i vomit" type games?

fricking ivy leagers.

Moonshine Mike

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

soozycue — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:20:53 EDT

The Stanford Shrub? That sounds pretty tough.

soozycue

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Carmen McFanzone — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:18:32 EDT

Won't someone think of the saplings?

Carmen McFanzone

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Rob Iracane — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:18:07 EDT

I was informed there would be no math.

Rob Iracane

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Gordon Bombay — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:16:52 EDT

f'(hilarity) = vodka

Gordon Bombay

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

BowdenBowdenBowden — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:15:42 EDT

Deadspin + Monday morning = no work

BowdenBowdenBowden

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Christmas Ape — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:14:12 EDT

Hilarity! - vodka = work

Christmas Ape

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Gordon Bombay — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:11:34 EDT

Note to self: refresh before posting.

Gordon Bombay

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Gordon Bombay — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:11:03 EDT

Falco proves the commutative property of hilarity.

Gordon Bombay

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Criminal Appeal — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:10:51 EDT

Nice Suss.

I for one think that if the NCAA is going to ban the tree, Stanford should replace it with a Native American warrior character. I bet the kids would really go for that kind of thing.

Criminal Appeal

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Matt Sussman — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:09:58 EDT

Falco, I think we are all aware of the commutative property here.

Matt Sussman

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Footsteps Falco — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:09:04 EDT

Photosynthesis + vodka = hilarity!

Footsteps Falco

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Footsteps Falco — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:07:36 EDT

Vodka + photosynthesis = hilarity!

Footsteps Falco

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Sh!tShow — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:07:09 EDT

Ahhh, they were gonna show a close up of the rod!

Sh!tShow

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

silver lining — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:06:22 EDT

You've got quite the high speed chase motif going on this morning.

silver lining

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Mike Honcho — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:05:54 EDT

Giant chainsaw. Not only is it more intimidating, but also the logical next step up from a tree.

Mike Honcho

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah! — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:05:49 EDT

Those crazy Stanford kids, their only means of social expresion are either "getting drunk in public whilst wearing a tree costume" or "awkward high-fives and fist pumps."

For shizzle.

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Christmas Ape — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:02:06 EDT

In rod we trust.

Christmas Ape

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

diddly — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:01:57 EDT

BDD - to make them feel inferior, or at home?

diddly

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Drew Magary — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:59:52 EDT

If so, what will replace it?

Since most Stanford students are Asian, may I suggest a long bamboo rod?

Drew Magary

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Rob Iracane — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:59:02 EDT

You complete me.

Rob Iracane

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Matt Sussman — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:58:35 EDT

Poor sap.

Matt Sussman

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Christmas Ape — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:58:12 EDT

Woodsy is such an enabler.

Christmas Ape

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Mike Honcho — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:57:46 EDT

Damn!

Mike Honcho

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Mike Honcho — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:57:33 EDT

Why dont you make like a tree and get the hell outta here!

Mike Honcho

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Rob Iracane — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:56:25 EDT

NCAA: "Make like a tree and get outta here."

Rob Iracane

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

diddly — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:55:35 EDT

One of the questions at trivia at the bar last week was Stanford's mascot, which inexplicably is the Cardinal; while I got it right, I really, really wanted to put "shitfaced tree".

diddly

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Drew Magary — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:55:22 EDT

If the Tree gets really shitfaced, you can get a ton of syrup out of him.

Drew Magary

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Drew Magary — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:54:35 EDT

I like how the tree costume's mouth is right at cock-and-balls level.

Drew Magary

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

diddly — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:53:25 EDT

Fuck that, I made those mix tapes...She can't have them!

diddly

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Brad_Lee — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:53:20 EDT

This one time at band camp, I did it with a drunk tree.

Brad_Lee

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Juancho — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:52:14 EDT

That tree is four leaves to the wind.

Juancho

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

KOGOD — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:51:26 EDT

I'll never forget sitting courtside to watch my old friend Salim and his Hawks buddies take on the Wiz. Josh Childress was clearly rattled by the third quarter after hearing me call him a tree for two straight hours.
I found out through an acquaintance that Josh was still somewhat confused at dinner that night.

KOGOD

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Brad_Lee — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:51:12 EDT

Why can't a tree get his Goose on?

Brad_Lee

The Ballad Of Stanford's Misbehaving Tree

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface — Mon, 28 Aug 2006 10:50:20 EDT

Take the boom box back? Don't forget all the cassette tapes too

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface