<![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands - Deadspin Comments]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands - Deadspin Comments]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Your use of "satire" is confusing...

supermike3

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> If god didn't intend for us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat.

Speed Ball

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> biff bigten: supermike mcfly, you're a chicken abortion!

supermike mcfly: did you call me a chicken abortion? nobody calls me a chicken abortion! besides, biff, eggs are chicken periods you fool!

biff bigten: ok, then mcfly, you're a chicken period. you should make like an aborted baby and leave!

drewheyman

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> hey mike - guess what underdeveloped veins are? BLOOD!

The yolk is formed in the follicular sac by the deposition of continuous layers of yolk material. Ninety-nine percent of the yolk material is formed within the 7-9 days before the laying of the egg. When the yolk matures, the follicular sac ruptures or splits along a line with few, of any, blood vessels. If any blood vessels cross the stigma, a small drop of blood may be deposited on the yolk as it is released from the follicle. This causes most blood spots in eggs. After the yolk is released from the follicle, it is kept intact by the vitelline membrane surrounding it. The release of the yolk from the ovary is called "ovulation."

So, again, go fuck yourself. Not only are you mean, but in this instance you're not even right.

BigTenObsession

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Give me a break, I noticed replays of the Suns-Nets game where Nash's finger tips were covered with gauze. "Thousands of cows" versus millions of dollars in lawsuits/ grievances over spontaneously bleeding appendages, what a choice.

Speaking of appendages...

Lindsay: I think it looks frightening when it's cut off. Its a Doberman let it have it's ears.

magilacudy

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> oh it was SATIRE!!! was this satire too?

ever crack an egg and see something red inside? those are underdeveloped veins, my friend.

so, you didn't actually believe that a baby chicken WOULD have grown in an egg? and you know that the "red" is just blood then.. from the "mama" chicken? because, i must have read all that wrong. ly.

i can't believe YOU took "raw monkey's ass" seriously. see, i WAS just joking - obviously "raw monkey's ass" isn't MUCH of an insult - but now i'm not.

supermike3

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> supermike and deadguy - I actually think that both of YOU are missing my point. I am very aware of the facts of life thanks, my point about eggs (of the chicken variety) was meant as satire of the sort of extremist argument that some PETA members (and others) would make. If you had read my other post carefully, I acknowledged that all eggs if fertilized have any opportunity to become a living thing. (and I was in no way making comment on whether or not 'wasting' an egg, or individual spermatazoa for that matter, is an evil thing)

As for taking offense at your 'harmless' comments, I don't think that calling someone a 'raw monkey's ass' and impugning their intelligence are harmless at all. You seem to be the type of person who feels that they can say whatever they want, be as rude as they want, and then not suffer any consequences (i.e. be thought of as an asshole) simply by saying 'lighten up', 'I was just goofing', or something else just as inane.

BigTenObsession

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Thank you MDT, for bring Arrested Development back into our lives, even it was only briefly.

Little Wooden Boy

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Meat-Eater's Haiku:

Did not claw my way
To the top of the food chain
Just to eat veggies

Tex

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> i'm always correct. i'm just mean about it and people get upset.

i get the "youknow, i useta think you were treated bad, but now i SEE THEY WERE RIGHT!!!!! you ARE a jerk! make love to me now!!!" alot.

from commenters, women, clergy, pets...

supermike3

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> BTO, you do have to agree that supermike2's point is correct.

You did know that every time a woman has a period, an egg goes unfertilized, right (similar to a chicken laying an egg)?

Otherwise you're saying that a woman should be continually pregnant from her first menstruation to avoid the possibility of wasted eggs (ABORTION!!!!).

Wait, actually she would have to get pregnant on her very first period ... other wise there'd be another wasted egg (ABORTION!!!!). If you weren't aware, the average age for a girls first period is 11 ... so yeah, you should get right on preventing those abortions.

aDEADguy

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Listen here, you raw monkey's ass: the point you SHOULD be making is that you're right, PETA members shouldn't technically eat eggs, cheese, milk, or any other animal product or by-product, as all of those are harvested in some way or another that they wouldn't like.

but no, saying an egg "would have had the opportunity to develop into a life" is still incorrect. that is the same as saying an individual sperm would have had that same opportunity. and no one wastes those either, right?

wow - you really took offense to my pretty harmless comments! those commenters that are "hard on me" are easily offended. i'll add you to the list.

supermike3

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> supermike - although using the word 'abortion' was technically incorrect, I was just trying to make a point about the reality that eggs (as in female human eggs as well), would have had the opportunity to develop into a life (yes, if fertilized). No particular reason for you to get all upset call me a 'raw monkey's ass' and then make a second comment questioning my intelligence. I used to think other commenters were a little hard on you about your poor attitude, but now I can see that they were right. So, go fuck yourself.

BigTenObsession

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Why are some eggs brown and some white? Does that mean different types of menstrual periods or maybe is this a question John Rocker's beyotch could answer?

Fawn Liebowitz

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> yahtzee

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> I'd like to go in her rabbithole.

shtickless

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> PETA should be alerted that the Deadspin Comment Server's hamster is being grossly over-worked.

supermike3

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Also, BigTenObsession: the Earth is more than 5,000 years old.

supermike3

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> BigTenObsession - if an egg is an aborted baby chicken, then every time a girl menstruates, she is having an abortion.

it is an UNFERTILIZED egg, you raw monkey's ass!

supermike3

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?

soozycue

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Imogen Bailey?
I thought that was porn star Devon...

I have shared too much.

Satyr Icon

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> An egg is a chicken's menstrual period.

You're welcome.

jane

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Lindsay: I care deeply for nature.
Michael: You're wearing ostrich-skin boots.
Lindsay: Well, I don't care about ostriches.

MDT

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Okay, it's official: The only bunnies that I'll ever own -- or eat -- will be ones that have recently rubbed up against a model's naked breasts. And I'll hold the bunny while wearing leather gloves.....that are insulated by rabbit fur.

J.L. White

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> "I can't believe you eat there. Do you know what they do to those animals?"

"No, but it's delicious!"

44 in a Row

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Sorry to go against the flow, but I find the letter more than a little amusing.

In the battle between overly pampered, told-since-birth-that-the-rules-don't-ap..., completely-divorced-from-reality...">completely-divorced-from-reality...... NBA players and irrational, batshit insane, completely-divorced-from-reality...">completely-divorced-from-reality...... PETA extremists, I side with those who sit back and laugh at both.

claude balls

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> supermike and deadguy - ever crack an egg and see something red inside? those are underdeveloped veins, my friend.

BigTenObsession

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> make that cats.

twoeightnine

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> You leave Alf out of this. Cat's are delicious.

twoeightnine

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Oh, and also nutjobs like PETA and the ALF are to the left what abortion clinic bombers are to the right.

Remington Steal

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Not only shouldn't you lump vegetarians in with PETA, but animal welfare and omnivores aren't mutually exclusive either. I eat meat, but I buy local, hormone/antibiotic free, and grass fed (beef) whenever possible. Happy animals are delicious animals.

Remington Steal

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Mmm, I'm thinking of one right now, grilled medium rare on my plate with some mashed potatoes.

Ah, Metschick. Yet another reason you rule.

Phony Gwynn

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Good lord, I'm starving. And it's not even lunchtime yet. See what you people do? I hope your bad doings come back to all of you!

Jen P

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> yes, to clarify why eggs aren't 'aborted' ... they were never fertilized thus never developed an 'embryo' which is why they're only half as delicious as they should be.

aDEADguy

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> stern should have never given in to those fake breasted hippies to begin with.

Upshaws Leash

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> I imagine this will kill Bud Selig's idea to go with composite baseball mitts next season.

apostles03

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Hey, don't lump vegetarians in with PETA. We don't like that. (Well, I don't like that.)

TheStarterWife

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Jack does rock. Both he and I split our time between NYC and N'awlins so I have had the pleasure of carrying him home in two different cities. Make sure you try the alligator cheesecake, and his fried chicken is amazing as well.

Chief Wahoo

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> I'm sure that NBA players would love free hand-cream just as long as it isn't delivered by Rodney Coronado.

Yeah PETA. Rodney Coronado.

Strokke

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Tell Jack he rocks. I was there for a bachelor party (and Jazz Fest). I don't think that I've ever had a better meal.

twoeightnine

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Please, won't somebody think of the cows?

If by "think" you mean "fantasize about ways I'd like to violate" and by "cows" you mean "the woman in the picture" then I am already all over it.

Michael Bertin

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Is a NoFurBurger like a FauxTurkey?

BigTDog

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> eggs are not aborted baby chickens, dude.

supermike3

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> 289, you just made me drool. Jack lays that thin crispy rabbit over a bowl of creamy pasta. He's a buddy of mine and a great chef.

Speaking of food, I'll be glad to raise a glass and toast PETA when I'm at The Palm tonight tucking into a nice piece of prime beef.

Chief Wahoo

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> 83tilinfinity, also not to be confused with Imogen Coca.

I want a bunny.

Lady Andrea

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Please, won't somebody think of the cows?

Mmm, I'm thinking of one right now, grilled medium rare on my plate with some mashed potatoes.

Man, I'm hungry.

Metschick

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Is that a Brown Bunny?

Kung Fu Cantona

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Please, won't somebody think of the cows?

Jen P

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> "Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning 'lousy hunter'"

Andy Rooney

In Flagrante Delicto

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> I have to say that the composite ball probably isn't that big of a deal. Nash doesn't even want them to change the ball midstream. The biggest problem with the ball is that it was hoisted on the players without their approval. Had Stern played nice, this probably wouldn't have even been an issue.

PETA is wrong on the count of NBA players hands being too senstive. Sure, I used a composite ball playing recreationally and in high school (had an NBA genuine leather ball once, and actually found it to be too slippery for my tastes) and never had finger tip problems. Then again, I never played an 82 game season plus playoffs, preaseason, and practice. That's a lot of ball handling. If the scuffs and cuts are genuinely happening, then the ball needs to go.

And really, if the PETA people want bigger fish to fry, perhaps they should go after the shoes. Leather really isn't necessary for the shoes either, but I would guess most of them are either part or all leather and that the average big time player goes through scores of shoes in a season.

Lars

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> For every animal you don't eat, I'm going to eat three. (tm: Maddox)

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> That picture reminds me, if any of you are ever in New Orleans head over to Jacques - Imo's Cafe for the paneed rabbit. It's amazing. And get a side of alligator cheesecake to go with it. There's also one in NYC.

twoeightnine

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> moises alou is intrigued by this notion of "hand cream" and would like to subscribe to the newsletter.

SuperFrankieLampard

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Fuck PETA and the horse they gently led in with them.

Metsterioso

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> If we didn't use leather or beef, cows would be extinct. I'm going to buy a leather basketball just to piss off PETA.

David Pinto

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> After that picture, I'm thinking of switching to synthetic balls myself.

goathair

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Something tells me NBA superstars are the probably the least in need of PETA's charity.

Planned Parenthood, on the other hand....

ArkansasFred

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> You go bunny that made it to second base.

tater

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> The NBA will surely give up his its cow-derived ball the very moment PETA Senior Vice President MaryBeth Sweetland gives up her sheep-derived insulin.

(I know that comparing a lifesaving medical substance to a basketball is specious at best... but, c'mon, a PETA spokesperson just called a group of professional athletes "sissy." It's a good day for hyperbole.)

Hamm Beerger

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Funny you should say that 83tilinfinity...Imogen Heap played here in Lawrence last night, at the same theater where we went to For Your Consideration last night...which was good but not what I expected, in case you were wondering.

Pete Gaines

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> http://abclocal.go.com/wabc/story?section=local&id=4842922...

And this is what people who like animals do to them?

Maybe these PETA fuckers should start, uh, policing their own, you know?

Phony Gwynn

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Love the side boob shot, much more than the under butt.

Brad_Lee

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Is that girl in the photo the porn star Devon? Because if so, I have seen a lot of cruelty performed on/to her kitty cat.

And if it is her, the "No Fur" line definitely applies.

HeavyPettingZoo

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Imogen Bailey. Not to be confused with Imogen Heap, I guess.

83tilinfinity

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Don't get me wrong, I think cruelty to animals is sick, but it's possible to have a humane slaughter process (or is that an oxymoron). But how many of these PETA fanatics NEVER use a product that is animal-based and is derived only after the animal has died. I mean, they don't own any patent leather shoes? They don't ever eat eggs (aborted baby chickens)? They don't ever use glue (sorry Bobby!)?

BigTenObsession

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> NOT eating meat is a choice; eating meat is an instinct!
-Denis Leary

Kid Canada

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> These cows will already be dead for steaks

Yeah, are the same cows killed for their yummy steaks skinned for their leather? Or is it different cows?

Metschick

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> This doesn't make any sense. These cows will already be dead for steaks and leather jackets (thanks Will!) anyway.

BigTenObsession

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Eddie Griffin is very interested in this free hand cream offer

James Toney's Conditioning Coach

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> I would need a frontal shot to confirm that indeed there's "no fur".

I wouldn't mind her bringing me some cream for my balls...er, hands...uh, nevermind.

BDoc

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> I'm going to run over a dog today just to spite PETA.

Critic

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> "If God didn't intend for us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat."
--John Cleese

Yostal

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> This makes me want to buy that shirt:

People
Eating
Tasty
Animals

Phony Gwynn

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> What the hell is wrong with PETA? Do they hate Earth so much that they won't let the NBA help out with removal of the worst polluters on the planet? Cows produce more CO2 than cars and planes combined. If PETA has their way we'll all be boiling in the remains of the melted ice caps.

James Toney's Conditioning Coach

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> It's too bad that PETA doesn't have any boats docked off of the New Zealand coast.

parker91

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Methinks the placement of the the "NO FUR" line is quite suggestive.

Christmas Ape

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> They almost had me with the "people who actually work for a living" angle. But I wonder how many PETA members actually work for a living. Seems like an organization for people who don't have enough to do.

... which could also apply to Deadspin commenters, I suppose.

Luckless Pedestrian

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> I wanna do da heizman on dat ho.

chopper dave

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> That picture is remarkably similar to the cover of my favorite porno.
Except--you know--instead or rabbits there are horses.
...
I've said too much.

A Magician Named GOB

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> I fucking hate PETA. Anyone else see that episode of Bullshit?

Pete Gaines

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Fuck Barbaro. Does this mean Pam Anderson is reading Deadspin now? MAybe we could point her the the Barbaro boards, lot of lonely old bastards over there needin' their trouser snakes taken care of.

eL Pata

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Oh, if only one of those were Bunnicula.

Christmas Ape

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> You know, between this pic and the two of LeeAnn Tweeden and that Rocketboom lady, I have a sneaking suspicion the Fleshbot has come alive, HAL-style, and is running all Gawker sites.

Next up, Kotaku will show nerds nothing but digital women in bathing sui... oh wait, it does that everyday already.

Sandy Magic Jackson

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> I am intrigued by the nubile blonde in your advertisement and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

Kid Canada

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> My leather jacket says: "Fuck you, PETA, I'm perfectly happy where I am."

Metschick

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Anna Benson thinks she's a fugly slut.

badbabu

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> What a bunch of Barbaro-fuckers

KOGOD

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> Why do I have a feeling we can add PETA to the group of animal lovers who hate Deadspin?

BigTDog

]]> <![CDATA[PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands]]> You know, the term "Sissystar" could describe several NBA players.

The Fake Gimel Martinez

]]>