Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds - Deadspin Comments

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you — Wed, 20 Dec 2006 09:29:56 EST

I was reading the new GQ -- DeNiro on the cover -- & it features an article on combatting baldness. In the "bad combovers" section, there was Berman's. The caption underneath, though? "You're with me, rogaine".

... Now, don't take this as a reason to vote Berman. In fact, it's not.

Vote H.R.

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Metschick — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 18:05:25 EST

One of my fucking officemates asks me where I'm going everytime I leave the office and where I've been when I get back.

I had a co-worker who did something similar that used to drive me insane. I would come back from lunch with a bag from McDonald's/Wendy's/whatever, and she'd ask me "so what you eating for lunch?" Can she not fucking see the bag in my hand? One day, I came in with a McD's bag, and she asked me, and I replied, "Wendy's." And she said, "then why do you have a McD's bag?" All I said to her was "Ask a stupid question..."

For some reason, she got offended by that.

Metschick

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

preciousroy — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 18:05:21 EST

This is ten times the ass-kicking I anticipated. Perhaps I should have offered up my dick in a box instead.

preciousroy

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

J. Henry Waugh — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 17:05:32 EST

Just wondering, but why isn't there more Jim Rome bashing 'round these parts? You lot of malcontents and degenerates* seem like just the sort to go after him.

*I can think of no higher praise

J. Henry Waugh

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Basshole — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 16:55:52 EST

She also insists on asking me what I "got" when I walk into the office with anything in my hand because my company gives out free food a lot. Take for instances when I have paper clips in my hand or a folder. I know I probably just despise her but I can't stand this.

Sorry to keep this side conversation going, but I can't stand this. One of my fucking officemates asks me where I'm going everytime I leave the office and where I've been when I get back. He fucking talks to himself all day; tells inane, pointless stories; and smacks his gum all fucking day. My other officemates think he is going to come with a firearm one day. I hate this fuck so much I wish he would just so I'd have an excuse to whup his ass.

Sorry. Please continue with girl-on-girl groping and Johnny Weir comments...

Basshole

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Barry White Stripes, Office LW — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 16:42:22 EST

HR is going to get...

JACKED UP!!!

--Vote for Rory/HR--

Barry White Stripes, Office LW

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Lance Uppercut — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 16:08:24 EST

If I can break out of this for a second, I just saw the news that AI is going to the Nuggets. As a Philly fan, the thought of Allen in a Nuggets uniform is making me nauseous and dizzy. I had been holding out hope that he and Billy King would make up and do some hetero man touching and everything would be fine. Now please excuse me while I go into the bathroom and throw-up in the handicap stall

Lance Uppercut

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Lance Uppercut — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 16:02:21 EST

Carl Monday is telling Barbaro not to drive the lane in the last 1:30 of their match-up

Lance Uppercut

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

The Professor — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 16:00:21 EST

I can't in good conscious vote for Chris Berman. I am convinced that he used steroids. Look at how big his head has gotten.

The Professor

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

BigRicks — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:54:49 EST

How can someone (or some horse) win sportshuman of the year if they weren't even voted into the Hall of Fame? Bring on Berman vs. Monday.

BigRicks

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Lizabelle — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:47:22 EST

Barbaro vs. Monday is going to be EPIC!!!!!

Lizabelle

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Dweeze — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:37:18 EST

The Disciples of Barbaro?

Dweeze

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

JJ Gittes — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:37:07 EST

When I voted for Boomer, I made his stupid "whooot" noise to myself. What an asshole. And I may, in fact, be referring to myself.

JJ Gittes

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Lizabelle — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:35:54 EST

Pardon the interruption from the Barbaro message board...

Hello Precious Horse!I love you so very much.I will follow you for the rest of your life(or mine!).God continues to cover you with His mercy and I continue to hold you very close to my heart.Merry Christmas and a Healthy 2007.
Jamie Gillispie, 41; Johnson City, TN, USA
posted on 2006-12-19 15:44:13

Lizabelle

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

HugsFromHarold — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:35:27 EST

Berman-Barbaro: Man vs. Beast; which is which?

HR go order some more Cinnamon apples and PArsely potatoes. Boomer is my vote.

HugsFromHarold

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:34:47 EST

I got it from here, UM, damn!
The chain remains, the game is in tact
The name is mine, I'll take blame for that
The pressure's on, but guess who ain't gon' crack? HAHA
Pardon me I had to laugh at that

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

wildhobo — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:33:53 EST

wildhobo

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Unsilent Majority — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:20:58 EST

notsoclever doesn't care about all those poor people that are dying for his blood saphires

Unsilent Majority

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Mackey-Sasser — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:19:13 EST

Wildhobo,

The humming officemate may suck, but try sitting near a guy that sings Tears for Fears and Bauhaus all day long! Thank God my desk was moved or I would have tried to kill myself and have my publicist deny the incident.

Mackey-Sasser

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

badbabu — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:18:48 EST

Berman is just a buffoon. Harold Reynolds is fighting back. Go girl on girl groping.

Huzzah! Just what I wanted to hear after our office party smorgasmboard.

badbabu

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Metsterioso — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:07:54 EST

At this point, I'd grope Vanessa Redgrave.

Metsterioso

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Lizabelle — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 15:04:17 EST

Berman is just a buffoon. Harold Reynolds is fighting back. Go girl on girl groping.

Lizabelle

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Metschick — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:58:41 EST

Congrats, NotSoClever.

Metschick

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

NotSoClever — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:55:43 EST

I proposed to my girlfriend with a sapphire ring this weekend, and after spreading the good word, immediately got this back in a text message.

"You're with me, sapphire."

If only I'd actually PROPOSED that way...

NotSoClever

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

44 in a Row — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:52:36 EST

Speaking of Johnny Weir...

"Get away from me, leather!"

44 in a Row

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Dweeze — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:52:13 EST

I am very much looking forward to Berman vs. Barbaro. It's like the old Fox show where they had man vs. beast.

Which is which?

Dweeze

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

wildhobo — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:52:03 EST

So completely off topic has anyone ever had an office-mate that hums at her desk? Not even sings but hums just quietly enough to annoy the crap out of you? Sorry I meant you're with me, Barbaro?

wildhobo

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Summer-of-George — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:50:11 EST

Oh yeah, where do I sign up to grope Venessa Marcil?

Summer-of-George

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Summer-of-George — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:49:06 EST

I'm scared of all the reused jokes we will seeing in the Barabro vs Berman final….You're with me, Dee Mirch dead horse pick-up lines that we have all heard before.

Summer-of-George

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

44 in a Row — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:45:06 EST

I would grope Vanessa Marcil any time, in any place.

If you were talking about anyone else, I'd say something like, "I would totally watch such an event, and would gladly purchase the pay-per-view." But Vanessa Marcil? Dibs.

44 in a Row

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Little Wooden Boy — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:42:42 EST

Well, who wouldn't grope Vanessa Marcil, 44 in a row?

That dude checking out Tony Dungy.

Little Wooden Boy

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

MidwestCoastBias — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:42:40 EST

Because CB isn't here to make the bad puns himself (as far as we know)...I am very much looking forward to Berman vs. Barbaro. It's like the old Fox show where they had man vs. beast. And as a twosome, are they Ber-baro? Bar-man? Will he call himself Berman the Barbaro-ian if he wins?

MidwestCoastBias

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Satyr Icon — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:42:39 EST

You're with me, consolation round.

Satyr Icon

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

HeavyPettingZoo — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:42:26 EST

I voted for HR. Berman needs to go. At the risk of igniting a riot, we need to put "You're with me, Leather" to bed before it develops into the following other "hilarious" catchphrases:

"Whatchu talkin' bout, Willis?"
"Where's the beef?"
"Talk to the hand cause the face ain't listening"
"T.M.I."
"Do I make you horny, baby?" (or any Austin Powers comment)
Any Borat comment (fast forward to 2008)

HeavyPettingZoo

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Russkiejedi — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:41:47 EST

This is not fair. Carl and Barbaro should be squaring off in the FINAL!!! Barbaro's end of the year performance (with the message board really coming into its own) was spectacular, and should have vaulted him into #1.

See, this is why we can't have a playoff. Instead, we should just have a committee that chooses who they think should square off for the championship, along with the help of some old farts who don't read Deadspin and some computer nerds. That would be SO much better than a playoff, and everyone would agree on the final outcome. I can't think of any analogous situation where anyone would be unsatisfied with that...

Russkiejedi

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Jack Cobra — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:35:49 EST

The chest hair blinded me, I had to vote for Berman

Jack Cobra

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

David Hume — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:34:29 EST

holy shit this is the part where it gets hard

Speaking of Johnny Weir...

David Hume

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Phony Gwynn — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:31:06 EST

Berman got me on this website, so I had to go with him.

But believe me, the battle over the mouse was epically legendarily classic.

Phony Gwynn

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Metschick — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:31:00 EST

I would grope Vanessa Marcil any time, in any place.

Metschick

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

SteveJeltzFan — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:29:44 EST

...sigh...Dear Barbaro,
You have hooves, you cannot use marbles...

Also, Vanessa Marcil is on both my and my wife's list, so if anyone runs in to Ms. Marcil, drop me a line, ok?

SteveJeltzFan

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Upshaws Leash — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:29:27 EST

holy shit this is the part where it gets hard

Upshaws Leash

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Dweeze — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:28:15 EST

No, I think he would grope her, too.

Perhaps, but only because he wanted her outfits for himself.

Dweeze

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Spaceman Bill Leah — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:25:47 EST

This is pretty much just voting for who wins 3rd place.

Spaceman Bill Leah

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Boston_Rob — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:25:42 EST

Monday - Jackin it............

Boston_Rob

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Charles — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:25:04 EST

Can I write-in Ned?

Charles

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Moletran — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:25:00 EST

You're with me, most cliched inside joke of all time.

Nevertheless, had to go Boomer. Let's just hope Pacman Jones doesn't make any more plays this season.

Moletran

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Dweeze — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:24:23 EST

My vote for Sportshuman of the Year

Thank you, Time magazine

Dweeze

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Rozelle’s Bagman — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:24:12 EST

he
could
get
all
the
votes!

Rozelle’s Bagman

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

44 in a Row — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:24:11 EST

No, I think he would grope her, too.

44 in a Row

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Hustler of Culture — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:22:36 EST

SHH

You're with me, tired catch phrase?

Still gotta vote for Berman....

Hustler of Culture

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Lady Andrea — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:21:41 EST

You might even say Monday-Barbaro is going to be......wait for it....legendary.

Lady Andrea

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Unsilent Majority — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:21:04 EST

SUSS WINS!

Time Inc. loses!

Unsilent Majority

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Dweeze — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:19:55 EST

Just to prep us for the next round:

You take me back to a time & place when life was simple & pure. You, my friend are the electricity that beats our hearts, the force that controls our souls & the spirit that rides the wind. You are everything good in our lives - you are our hero.
Catherine O'day, 24; Cleveland, OH, The Midnight Horse Show
posted on 2006-12-19 14:00:19

Dweeze

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah! — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:19:27 EST

Well, who wouldn't grope Vanessa Marcil, 44 in a row?

Johnny Weir?

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:18:49 EST

is anyone else tired of Berman? I mean it was one story... one hysterical story, but one story nonetheless. (and it spawned a never-ending slew of one-liners that got very old very fast)

ok. i'm done.

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Matt Sussman — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:17:49 EST

My vote for Sportshuman of the Year:

You.

Matt Sussman

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

44 in a Row — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:17:34 EST

I know it's been said before, but it bears repeating: Monday-Barbaro is going to be epic.

44 in a Row

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Lady Andrea — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:17:32 EST

Well, who wouldn't grope Vanessa Marcil, 44 in a row?

Lady Andrea

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Chicago Jones — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:17:02 EST

Boy, Boomer sure has a lot of chest hair...

whoa, I mean that Tony Dungy sure knows how to sport of sweater vest.

Chicago Jones

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

yamabushi — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:16:26 EST

your with me, Sportshuman of the year award.

yamabushi

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:15:24 EST

HR, please save us from the leather/Barbaro jokes... I'd much prefer groping/Barbaro.

What? Why is everyone laughing? What did I say?

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Mayor McRib — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:14:42 EST

I'm voting with my head and not my heart. This was very tough, but I think that HR might be huge in 2007. Plus, Berman busted out the pathetic "Your In Good Hands With Allstot" reference last night. That just sealed the deal for me.

Mayor McRib

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah! — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:13:50 EST

Do I vote for the Establishment, or the man who is suing the Establishment? In the spirit of this Underground website, I went with HR.

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

DannyNoonan — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:13:06 EST

HR is standing up for a man's right to grope interns, which I'm pretty sure is in the Bill of Rights

DannyNoonan

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

44 in a Row — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:12:59 EST

I would grope Vanessa Marcil any time, in any place.

44 in a Row

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Technicolor Jan Stenerud — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:12:35 EST

SAS wants his studio audience to boo Kid Canada.

Technicolor Jan Stenerud

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

preciousroy — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:12:33 EST

I know it's a losing cause, but if Reynolds wins, I will show you all my tits.

preciousroy

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Unsilent Majority — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:10:29 EST

Berman's great, but HR is suing the Beast.

Unsilent Majority

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Kid Canada — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:09:58 EST

Boomer: NOBODY...CIRCLES THE WAGONS...like CHRIS BERMAN!

TJ: Absolutely. Yes. Yes. Definitely. Absolutely.

Boomer: JUST putting it out there!

TJ: Yes. Yes. Absolutely. Yes.

Boomer: So you're ALL ON CHRIS BERMAN, EH?

TJ: Uh-huh. Yes. Absolutely.

Jaws: NOW! You want to START...CHRIS...BERMAN! And you want to SIT...HAROLD...REYNOLDS!

Irvin: T.O.!

All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! BOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Rachel Nichols: Kid Canada, I want to bear your children.

Ed Werder: Kid Canada, I want to bear your children.

Kid Canada

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Unsilent Majority — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:09:16 EST

don't make me choose...this is way too hard

Unsilent Majority

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

StuScott Booyahs — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:07:52 EST

We're really just wasting time here until the inevitable Chris Berman/Barbaro Battle of the Millenia

StuScott Booyahs

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds

Lady Andrea — Tue, 19 Dec 2006 14:06:02 EST

Now if James Caan ever groped Vanessa Marcil in a Boston Market on "Las Vegas," then Harold might get my vote.

Lady Andrea