Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon - Deadspin Comments

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Trackback — Thu, 01 May 2008 12:47:19 EDT

Now that the draft is over, there is nothing standing in the way of starting to preview Fantasy Football for the upcoming season. I thought I'd start by looking at the newest members of the NFL, and projecting how I see them fitting in to the Fantasy Football fold.

Trackback

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Will Leitchs Unfinished Novel — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 19:50:53 EST

Two playmates? You know what the sex cannon calls that? Foreplay, bitches, foreplay.

Will Leitchs Unfinished Novel

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

DAGOTRON — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 17:10:17 EST

grungedave: Never underestimate the power of the Sex Cannon, lest ye wake up to find you've been throwgasmed in your sleep.

DAGOTRON

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

grungedave — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 16:59:39 EST

SWJ - I am not sure. In 2005 - Kyle Orton was a Deadspin/Interwebs hero. Then he got benched. In 2006 he was practically invisible. I fear the same fate for the Sex Cannon.

grungedave

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Kid Canada — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 16:40:40 EST

Vince Neil gave us Janine Lindemulder. So he's got that going for him, which is nice.

Kid Canada

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

HugsFromHarold — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 16:38:58 EST

Cowbell, I prefer this one!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aR7GUiiKEz0&mode=related&se...

HugsFromHarold

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

HugsFromHarold — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 16:26:20 EST

"Boychuck" That sounds like a description of a Sex Cannon pass.

HugsFromHarold

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

DAGOTRON — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 16:19:10 EST

+1 Spectacular Sam

grungedave: I might actually welcome the opportunity for the Sex Cannon and Kyle Orton sharing the bench. Any cheerleader who dare sit on that bench after the game will automatically become impregnated with a Sloth baby.

Also, it would give the scout team receivers and backs a chance to get sprayed by the Sex Cannon in practice as opposed to the showers.

DAGOTRON

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Juancho — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 16:17:41 EST

Andie is right- Hef has admitted to experimenting.

Juancho

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

GungaGalunga — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 16:06:42 EST

That picture reminded me of an old classic:

A bunny and a bear are taking a crap in the woods the bear says to the bunny:
"Do you have a problem with poop sticking to you fur?"
The bunny says, "No."
So the bear wipes his ass with the bunny.

GungaGalunga

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Tuffy — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 16:03:53 EST

44: I'm not even a huge fan of Vegas; I just love Richard Abowitz's writing. He's knowledgeable, snappy, and tells great stories well.

Tuffy

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

wiskybreth — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 16:02:01 EST

Wow. Vince not Young.

wiskybreth

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

badbabu — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:59:20 EST

Sex Cannon doesn't just lay, Texas Gal. He plows. He plunders. He pillages.

A true cumslinger, if there ever was one.

badbabu

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

grungedave — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:57:17 EST

I swear, if the Bears sign Jeff Garcia or promote Brian Griese, I am going to be severely depressed by the lack of Sex Cannon stories next year...

grungedave

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

44 in a Row — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:57:05 EST

Tuffy, I'm thrilled to find someone besides me who reads the Movable Buffet.

44 in a Row

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Michael Bertin — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:57:01 EST

Also, shouldn't the post title be:

"Meet the Sex Cannon

... ladies"

Michael Bertin

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

diggity — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:56:17 EST

Did he fumble the dice for a 7?

diggity

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Texy — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:54:32 EST

Oh, Sex Cannon, how I've missed you so. I feared that in the bloody aftermath of your XLI performance, that you'd be laying off the nightlife for a while. Thank goodness you're still just laying everything that moves.

Texy

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Drew Magary — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:52:56 EST

No Sex Cannon tag?

Drew Magary

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Ed McMahon's Party Machine — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:52:28 EST

"Hit me"
"On an eighteen, sir?"
"Yes, I also like to live dangerously"

Ed McMahon's Party Machine

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

J-No — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:51:34 EST

He hasn't looked that confident since his passer rating was over 100 in October. If only he was as good at passing as he is at hitting on Playboy Bunnies.

J-No

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Matt Sussman — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:51:07 EST

I guess during the offseason his arms turn into Playmates.

Matt Sussman

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Spectacular Sam — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:49:22 EST

I am the Sex Cannon. LOOK AT MY STRIPED SHIRT! LOOK AT IT!

Spectacular Sam

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Raskolnikov — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:45:31 EST

Fuck it. I'm covering the Sex Cannon (this is me calling dibs on 24/7 Rex for DeadOn).

No, no, no. Haven't we learned that the Sex Cannon covers ALL of us?

Raskolnikov

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

metroville — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:44:53 EST

Looks like Robin Leach has enjoyed a few too many champagne wishes and caviar dreams.

metroville

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Lady Andrea — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:44:52 EST

Please, you think Hef doesn't swing both ways? All the crazy shit he's seen and parties he's hosted? I would be very surprised.

Lady Andrea

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Tuffy — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:44:28 EST

Robin Leach is Movable Buffet-approved. Therefore, I approve.

Tuffy

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

BigTenObsession — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:44:08 EST

sadly, I already knew that Robin Leach had a blog.

BigTenObsession

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

I Heart Poop — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:41:40 EST

rex is the one man who can force hugh hefner to question his own sexuality.

I Heart Poop

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

cowbell204 — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:41:26 EST

Hilarious video from the dugout(NSFW)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xrNcqjosRbs

cowbell204

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

grungedave — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:38:01 EST

Careful there, Rextacy... Rachel Nichols is going to get jealous soon!

grungedave

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

KOGOD — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:37:34 EST

bb- don't call him a tracer

KOGOD

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Lizabelle — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:36:48 EST

And apparently treated them all to a "pre-dawn session of stamina."

Lizabelle

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Michael Bertin — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:36:46 EST

Fuck it. I'm covering the Sex Cannon (this is me calling dibs on 24/7 Rex for DeadOn).

Michael Bertin

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Agent Michael Scarn — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:36:18 EST

Who's older - Vince Neil or Greg Oden?

Agent Michael Scarn

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

BigRicks — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:35:00 EST

Grossman took out her eye with the dice, and then impregnated her with his glare.

BigRicks

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

12-Inch Idongivafuck Sandwich — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:34:36 EST

Thank you Deadspin, for linking me to the origins of the Sex Cannon...my day has been fulfilled...

12-Inch Idongivafuck Sandwich

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Tranny McHardpenis — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:34:15 EST

What didn't happen to Robin Leach? Guy likes to party. He was seen forcing Grossman to call him the Sex Howitzer.

Tranny McHardpenis

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

44 in a Row — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:34:01 EST

If Wikipedia is any guide, it seems that the answer to "What happened to Robin Leach?" is, "He consumed the population of Ecuador."

44 in a Row

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Cockeye Jones — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:33:57 EST

last game of the season : new year's eve
super bowl :

a) partying with playmates
b) ironing your pink shirt
c) being given a gentle up-and-down by Robin Leach.
d) All of the above.

Cockeye Jones

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Sandy Magic Jackson — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:33:52 EST

It's better than "celebrity colorist" Michael Richards.

Sandy Magic Jackson

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

ltwinslow — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:33:15 EST

so... Rex has a brother that bangs hookers and plays QB in New York? sounds about right to me

ltwinslow

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

Bad Barbecue — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:33:10 EST

What the hell is a "celebrity colorist" Michael Boychuck?

Is he a celebrity who colors stuff? Or does he color celebrities?

You're going to say both aren't you?

Bad Barbecue

Ladies, Meet The Sex Cannon

JFKFC — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:32:41 EST

Cannon, don't rock the pink button down with a gray undershirt, looks like shit. Come on man, you're the Cannon! I know you don't need to look good, but you can make a goddamn effort.

JFKFC