Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista - Deadspin Comments

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 20:21:19 EDT

@Weed Against Speed: Hagia Sophia was in Istanbul... I mean, Constantnople... I mean, Byzantium... I mean, whatever. But regardless, it's Turkish.

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

J.L. White — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 13:58:38 EDT

I saw Jeff weaver at a magic show once. It didn't save my marriage, but I did get a wicked contact high.

J.L. White

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

ILoveIt — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 12:47:25 EDT

I think Taj Mahal is her "working" name.

ILoveIt

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Jefferson Short Bus — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 12:46:44 EDT

Celie saved my marriage by telling me to beat Sophia.

/Harpo

Jefferson Short Bus

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

shtickless — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 12:44:08 EDT

Gary Sheffield thinks Latino ballplayers are involved in more stable, successful marriages because they take orders so well.

shtickless

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

MongoLikeCandy — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 12:07:55 EDT

Is there any way Taj Mahal is not a current of former stripper?

MongoLikeCandy

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Clare — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:57:45 EDT

@MrRedDevil: Nah, with his golden balls.

Clare

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Slothrop — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:57:05 EDT

Tom Brady taught me to dump my hot, pregnant girlfriend for a hot model. Strangely, I'm only finding smelly goats to cuddle with.

Slothrop

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

twoeightnine — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:56:38 EDT

I'm just surprised she's not named Trump Mahal. That douchebag will put his name on anything.

twoeightnine

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Civil Negligence — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:48:15 EDT

@Civil Negligence: Errr, A-Rod.

Civil Negligence

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

White Speed Receiver — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:48:02 EDT

I ran into Matt Leinart last summer when the Cards were here for a preseason game with the Vikes.

3 weeks later, my girlfriend was pregnant.

White Speed Receiver

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

ohmygodtheykilledkennyrogers — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:45:25 EDT

@Jake Fratelli: Yes, but how many concussions has she had?

ohmygodtheykilledkennyrogers

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Civil Negligence — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:44:43 EDT

Derek Jeter rekindled my love affair with my busted mistress.

Civil Negligence

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

JakeFratelli — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:42:19 EDT

Gene Upshaw told me to dump my current girlfriend because she's too old and doesn't matter anymore.

JakeFratelli

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Tuffy — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:42:14 EDT

@MrRedDevil: Trade secret. I signed a release.

Tuffy

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

MrRedDevil — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:40:30 EDT

@Tuffy: with his foot???

MrRedDevil

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Civil Negligence — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:40:23 EDT

@Camp Tiger Claw: But ain't that a whole lotta lovin'?

Civil Negligence

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

SwankyMode — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:39:16 EDT

You know, I felt the same way that time I saw Brett Myers and his wife together in Boston...

SwankyMode

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

BigTenObsession — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:38:50 EDT

@Upshaws Leash:

I thought Clooney already went over there and solved that thing.

BigTenObsession

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Tuffy — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:38:47 EDT

@Upshaws Leash: David Beckham cured my hemmorhoids.

Tuffy

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Upshaws Leash — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:37:48 EDT

oh yeah? well Chip Ambres is currently negotiating a successful resolution to the Korean hostage crisis. beat that!

Upshaws Leash

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Chicago Jones — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:36:58 EDT

@Camp Tiger Claw: So when will Miguel catch the Caty?

Chicago Jones

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

UkraineNotWeak — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:34:39 EDT

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes taught me that non-animate life forms can love.

UkraineNotWeak

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Tuffy — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:34:36 EDT

I learned from Derek Fisher how to turn a negative into a positive.

Tuffy

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Tobias Funke — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:34:25 EDT

@Weed Against Speed: He's dead? No wonder, they stopped doing spoofs of him on SNL. Well, that and Rich Hall has been off the show for about 23 years.

Tobias Funke

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Raskolnikov — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:33:24 EDT

@Rob Iracane: +1. Hey, you wanna swap +1's?

Raskolnikov

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

goathair — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:32:55 EDT

I forgot the ominicanA Republic had a baseball team.

goathair

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Hit Bull Win Steak — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:30:37 EDT

shortly after making this post, the author saw Doug and Jackie Christie at a Siegfried and Roy Show and promptly killed his wife with a shovel.

Hit Bull Win Steak

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Tobias Funke — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:30:17 EDT

I learned from Doug Christie how to use Vagisil

Tobias Funke

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Hit Bull Win Steak — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:28:25 EDT

@UkraineNotWeak: +10 (for the extra tonnage)

Hit Bull Win Steak

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

StevieY19 — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:27:41 EDT

Copperfield promoted the show by saying he would make the Taj Mahal disappear, needless to say the audience was not happy when it all played out.

StevieY19

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Camp Tiger Claw — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:27:36 EDT

Miguel Batista looks vaguely urban.

/d-copp

Camp Tiger Claw

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Jezzies-Scare-Me — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:27:17 EDT

I saw Michael Vick walking his dog one day and it completely changed my relationship with...never mind.

Jezzies-Scare-Me

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Weed Against Speed — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:27:14 EDT

Before he died, Doug Henning saved my love for dinner theater.

Weed Against Speed

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Sarge — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:26:37 EDT

@Lady Andrea: sounds like the monument of divorce papers

Sarge

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

UpstateUnderdog — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:26:26 EDT

taj mahal ? was she named after it or did she once work at there down in atalanta ?

UpstateUnderdog

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

UkraineNotWeak — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:25:36 EDT

@Hit Bull Win Steak:

I once dated The Colossus of Rhodes. Biggest female at Rhodes College.

UkraineNotWeak

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

MitchKayak — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:25:15 EDT

All Joe Namath did was teach me about vapor lock.

MitchKayak

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Lady Andrea — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:25:02 EDT

@Jake Fratelli: +1

Can we talk about how they were at a David Copperfield show? I want to know what national monument he made "disappear."

Lady Andrea

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Rob Iracane — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:24:32 EDT

Fritz Peterson saved my marriage, and vice versa.

Rob Iracane

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

being_sven — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:24:26 EDT

@Hit Bull Win Steak: Ah, memories of my summer romance with the Sphinx.

being_sven

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Doctor Lingerie — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:23:38 EDT

@The Teufel Shuffle: It's called The Avenger of Blood. Seriously.

Doctor Lingerie

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Hit Bull Win Steak — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:22:32 EDT

c'mon now, is there anyone here who HASNT dated someone named after one fo the Wonders of the World?

Hit Bull Win Steak

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

The Teufel Shuffle — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:22:24 EDT

Wasn't Miguel Batista writing a novel about a serial killer and a rapist? That's so inspiring.

The Teufel Shuffle

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Weed Against Speed — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:22:16 EDT

I once dated a girl named Hagia Sophia. She was into Greek.

Weed Against Speed

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

aloysius — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:21:46 EDT

boy, Will, that quote needs one huge freaking SIC stamped across it

aloysius

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

being_sven — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:21:30 EDT

Good to see Miguel is firmly entrenched in the 'No Tuck' camp with Leinart and Lachey.

being_sven

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

BigTenObsession — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:21:07 EDT

@goathair:

She's also popular with Indian guys.

BigTenObsession

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

JakeFratelli — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:20:48 EDT

Huh. This same thing happend with me and my wife, The Great Lighthouse of Alexandria.

JakeFratelli

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Camp Tiger Claw — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:20:42 EDT

Taj Mahal the blues singer? That's one fucked up celebrity couple.

Camp Tiger Claw

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

lisa — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:19:03 EDT

"in a verge of divorce". Uh...at what stage is that?

lisa

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Mr. Pennsylvania — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:18:17 EDT

I too was having problems in my relationship until I saw Black Jack Morris at a tenacious D concert, fixed the whole thing up.

Also, isn't Taj Mahal a Male Blues Singer?

Mr. Pennsylvania

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Afino — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:17:37 EDT

Taj Mahal sounds like the name of one of A-Rod's trannies.

Afino

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

Unsilent Majority — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:17:08 EDT

Wait a minute...dude's dating a chick named Taj Mahal and we're focusing on some douche with marriage problems?

Unsilent Majority

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

shtickless — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:17:04 EDT

Miguele Batista makes Atlas look like a pussy.

shtickless

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

goathair — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:16:43 EDT

His girlfriend's name is Taj Mahal? She sounds HUGE.

goathair

Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista

OchentaYcinco — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:16:38 EDT

Marv Albert taught me how to love again.

OchentaYcinco