This One's Optimistic - Deadspin Comments

This One's Optimistic

Sliderofdeath — Mon, 18 Feb 2008 07:37:07 EST

@Hit Bull Win Steak: Slider of Death wants to know: Does the carpet match the drapes?

Sliderofdeath

This One's Optimistic

drjayphd — Mon, 18 Feb 2008 00:53:57 EST

@Nationalcoholic: /performs Heimlich with all of manchild strength

drjayphd

This One's Optimistic

supermike4ever — Sun, 17 Feb 2008 19:42:52 EST

some daaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

supermike4ever

This One's Optimistic

S.O.L. — Sun, 17 Feb 2008 14:26:51 EST

I approve of Christmas Ape.

S.O.L.

This One's Optimistic

Afino — Sun, 17 Feb 2008 10:03:50 EST

@IchiroSuzukiSamurai:
You could ask ESPN for help with that.

Afino

This One's Optimistic

IchiroSuzukiSamurai — Sun, 17 Feb 2008 05:32:22 EST

Steve Phillips couldn't be hired as GM by all ten of those teams, could he?

IchiroSuzukiSamurai

This One's Optimistic

Whitey Fisk — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 23:57:28 EST

Of course it's Kazmir.

Whitey Fisk

This One's Optimistic

Greek McPapadopoulos — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 21:47:34 EST

@supermike4ever: ahh, supermike. Hysterical and useless, hysterical and useless.

Greek McPapadopoulos

This One's Optimistic

Hit Bull Win Steak — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 21:39:16 EST

had no idea who "Kim Possible" is, so I googled, and umm yeah...

[toonfamilies.net]

Hit Bull Win Steak

This One's Optimistic

DumpDolan — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 20:01:15 EST

There's a better chance for the Kashmir dispute to be settled by October than for Kazmir to be right.

DumpDolan

This One's Optimistic

ManuteBalls — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 19:56:20 EST

someone put the purple kool-aid in the rays' gatorade

ManuteBalls

This One's Optimistic

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 19:52:53 EST

@racistmascot_inc: To leave the Jays behind the Rays is beyond my comprehension? Do you have inside information that both A.J. Burnett & B.J. Ryan have those arms completely detach from their bodies by 30th April?

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you

This One's Optimistic

Metschick — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 18:58:33 EST

Also! Back in 2004, I saw this post on a D-Rays message board (don't ask), and I saved it. Yes, I've saved it for 4 years. It still makes me chuckle. Aw, Rays fans are so cute:

Okay, so we dropped one series. Let's look at the big pic here: We are just below .500 going into the All Star break, we have TALENT galore, and we are gonna ROCK our division's WORLD for the second half of the season and maybe even take the wild card spot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So: It's all good, really. We lost four games. To the Yanks. End of story, we go on, and we clinch the wild card spot, and we then win the playoffs and the World Series! What's not to love? Even if that doesn't come to pass, and even if the season ended right now, today, I would be bursting with pride over the 2004 Rays! We have come a long way, baby!

Metschick

This One's Optimistic

Metschick — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 18:56:05 EST

I LOVE you for including a picture of Kim Possible in that Rays uniform.

Metschick

This One's Optimistic

J-No — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 18:55:58 EST

@notthequarterback: As long as we continue to own the cards, we will survive. Of course our method of doing this is killing their pitchers off one at a time.

J-No

This One's Optimistic

supermike4ever — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 18:48:59 EST

@Greek McPapadopoulos: some day i am going to grow wings.

supermike4ever

This One's Optimistic

Moobs — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 18:12:32 EST

The Rays will never win as long as they keep being the Menudo of baseball.

Moobs

This One's Optimistic

Greek McPapadopoulos — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 18:06:28 EST

@supermike4ever: Scott Kazmir thinks that if you try the best you can, if you try the best you can, that the best you can is good enough.

Greek McPapadopoulos

This One's Optimistic

StevePerryPsychOut — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:45:43 EST

@Chief Wahoo: Why would it be? Kazmir can't even esure anyone that he'll make it past the 5th.

StevePerryPsychOut

This One's Optimistic

The Gizmo from Pismo — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:44:02 EST

man, kim's pouty lip bite is soooooo friggin' hot...

what?

The Gizmo from Pismo

This One's Optimistic

DemecoShallInherittheEarth — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:41:28 EST

The only way the rays are gonna play in October is if Selig decides to move the season back a few months to have a few more steroid hearings
That or Citizen Eco makes a watch commercial with Scott Kazmir. Those dudes know how to pick a winner way before everyone else does

DemecoShallInherittheEarth

This One's Optimistic

Nationalcoholic — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:41:16 EST

SteakGrowsOnDmitri: what in the FUCK is kim possible

Nationalcoholic

This One's Optimistic

shtickless — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:36:56 EST

Scott Kazmir keeps trying to sell me esurance.

shtickless

This One's Optimistic

The Professor — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:33:55 EST

Evan Longoria is going to be playing third base. That has got to be good for distracting the other team's batters...right?

The Professor

This One's Optimistic

7-8 Deville — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:32:34 EST

O AN HE SEXY

7-8 Deville

This One's Optimistic

supermike4ever — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:23:39 EST

this one just came out of the swamp

supermike4ever

This One's Optimistic

Placebo Jolt — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:13:13 EST

You guys hit like a bunch of old men that fought in the Spanish-American War, which hasn't even been fought yet! I'd like to take the whole lot of you and thrash you with this hand. Then bash you with this hand, then take both hands and give you a massage just to loosen you up!

Placebo Jolt

This One's Optimistic

HazelMaesLandingStrip — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:05:54 EST

You have no chance dawg.

/Elijiahfied

HazelMaesLandingStrip

This One's Optimistic

Rock You Like An Iracane — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:05:16 EST

@notthequarterback: In his defense, Kazmir has high hopes.

And we can only hope Dempster was high.

Rock You Like An Iracane

This One's Optimistic

Chief Wahoo — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:04:04 EST

Is that Erin E-Surance? Cause I think she's hot.

Chief Wahoo

This One's Optimistic

Le Légende de Vincent Tremblay — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:02:42 EST

Ya know, I have no trouble believing that a Disney cartoon character has better control than Kazmir.

Le Légende de Vincent Tremblay

This One's Optimistic

notthequarterback — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:02:26 EST

So let me get this straight...

Ryan Dempster says that the defending divisional champion Cubs are going to the World Series = hilarity ensues.

Scott Kazmir says the Rays, who have never finished above .500 in franchise history, could go to the playoffs = Meh.

Good. Just checking.

notthequarterback

This One's Optimistic

racistmascot_inc — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:02:07 EST

I'd say that there are only 6 teams who are definitely better than the Rays in the AL, and even one of those is questionable.

Outside of the 5 elite teams (Cleveland, Detroit, New York, LAA and Boston), I don't see why the Rays couldn't end up being the 6th best AL team. Of course, that wouldn't land them int he playoffs, but they have more of a chance that the Orioles, A's and Rangers do.

racistmascot_inc

This One's Optimistic

Signal to Noise — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:00:36 EST

Scott Kazmir sounds like he's gotten one "boom bitch" too many from Delmon Young in the off-season.

Signal to Noise

This One's Optimistic

Chuck Knoblockhead — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:00:31 EST

And Eli Manning is Ron Stoppable.

Chuck Knoblockhead

This One's Optimistic

Rock You Like An Iracane — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 16:59:41 EST

Kim Possible? Really?

I mean, "I see what you did there."

Rock You Like An Iracane

This One's Optimistic

KittyLitterKing — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 16:59:34 EST

Three plane crashes.....Yankees, Red Sox and Blue Jays.

Sorry, Orioles fans.

KittyLitterKing