Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently - Deadspin Comments

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

HockeyMountain — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 17:11:48 EDT

HockeyMountain

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

shawnkemp40 — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 20:18:15 EST

Mike's milkshake brings all the boys to the yard

shawnkemp40

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

FiddlingWhileJimRomeBurns — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 17:23:39 EST

So when do Buddy and Jack show up to rob him?

FiddlingWhileJimRomeBurns

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Whitey Fisk — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 17:13:02 EST

Good thing he didn't have fighting chihuahuas.

Whitey Fisk

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Chief Wahoo — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:43:20 EST

Gonna get me a shotgun, kill me all the whities I see...

Chief Wahoo

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Babcocksure — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:40:15 EST

substitute daddy is making the the site freak out

Babcocksure

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Barry Lutz — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:37:13 EST

I think it's admirable he is using protection in prison, not only for his own safety, but for that of others. He has herpes, you know.

Barry Lutz

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:35:19 EST

About time someone paid for protection for Mike Vick. The Falcons never did.

UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Cinco Ocho — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:33:59 EST

¡Viva Las Ron Mexico!

Cinco Ocho

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Deadspin — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:27:59 EST

How will Vick's lawyer communicate with his Hispanic security force?

Bob Loblaw no habla Espanol.

Deadspin

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Jefferson Short Bus — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:27:30 EST

It doesn't look good for Ookie. He needs the Human Beat Box to bring him a box of donuts with a "Get Out of Jail Free" card inside.

Jefferson Short Bus

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

the earl of weaver — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:22:12 EST

I see martin lawrence, but don't they need eddie murphy if they're looking to make this a proper "life" sequel?

the earl of weaver

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Fuck Lion — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:21:02 EST

He could save some money by borrowing the Prison Mike persona from Michael Scott.

Fuck Lion

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Len Bias Cocaine Surplus — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:17:18 EST

They only turned on him after he overthrew a wide open receiver in the end zone in the pickup game.

Len Bias Cocaine Surplus

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Secret Identity — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:16:28 EST

Just don't tell White Power Bill he has dirty ears.

Secret Identity

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

strong like bull smart like tractor — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:16:16 EST

@Gourmet Spud: Patti and Selma would like to know where they can access such a fine program.

strong like bull smart like tractor

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Dieter — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:15:16 EST

@Chief Wahoo: Viva gorditas.

Dieter

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Afino — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:15:11 EST

@tater:

Night night!

Keep your butthole tight!

Afino

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Deadspin — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:14:25 EST

*rape stand

Deadspin

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

buttons — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:14:11 EST

Qué tenemos aquí es una falta de comunicarse. Algunos hombres que usted apenas no puede alcanzar.

(Or something like that.)

buttons

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

MitchKayak — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:13:43 EST

Better watch your back Vick! Squirrel Master ain't gonna be there for you all the time. Next time I come for you, I'm gonna want some cocktail... FRUIT!

MitchKayak

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Deadspin — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:13:35 EST

Hopefully Vick's relatives haven't burned down the banana stand yet.

Deadspin

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

tater — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:12:19 EST

My name's Tyree and yeah I went to prison.

tater

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Dany Heatley Speedwagon — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:09:48 EST

I hear that story is total bull shit. The inmate wasn'tstepping it was just Maurice Clarett trying to get a pickup game together.

Dany Heatley Speedwagon

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:09:15 EST

I thought Media Takeout would be a Chinese themed social news site.

Coming Into The Game, ♪♪ ♪♪♪ #J23 - The Superstar Receiver, ofyourupperdeck TORONTOOOoo BJSss ®

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

iantenna — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:08:51 EST

@Jews For Purple Jesus: butt herpes?

iantenna

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Triple B — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:08:23 EST

The gang wanted Vick to praticipate in their usual "blood in, blood out" swearing in ceremony, but then they found out about the herpes.

Triple B

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

muggsybogues — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:05:54 EST

@Sir Hotbod Handsomeface: SO TRUE

muggsybogues

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Weed Against Speed — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:04:26 EST

To show the Mexican gang he was for real, on a bet, Vick ate 50 chalupas.

Weed Against Speed

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

HugsFromHarold — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:04:26 EST

oh yeah, and Martin Lawrence looks great in his new suit.

HugsFromHarold

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Dany Heatley Speedwagon — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:04:25 EST

Offending inmate: Black Power!

Vick: But I'm black?

Dany Heatley Speedwagon

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Chad Sexington — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:04:24 EST

@Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies: EVERYTHING I RAPE IS IMPORTANT!

Chad Sexington

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Babcocksure — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:04:24 EST

He should have just made friends with Drederick Tatum

Babcocksure

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Dany Heatley Speedwagon — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:03:40 EST

Once the licence plate factory roof needs a new coat of tar I'm sure everything will turn around.

Dany Heatley Speedwagon

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

racistmascot_inc — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:03:10 EST

@Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies:

Well, even with the unnecessary caps, he's probably right. Vick said he'd testify about other dog-fighting rings, right? No way they risk him getting killed in General Pop.

racistmascot_inc

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:02:50 EST

@racistmascot_inc: Check out commenter DLBrother, pictured with his...uh...boyfriend?

Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Chief Illiniwek — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:02:49 EST

Does the n-word offend you......nigger?

No sir.

Chief Illiniwek

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

The Diesel — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:02:47 EST

@Its The Beer Talking: Nasty Nate is always lurking. Always lurking for new fish.

The Diesel

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Spanish Necktie — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:02:12 EST

Mike Vick is having a difficult time fitting in.

Well, at least he's playing pitcher, not catcher.

Spanish Necktie

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

The Diesel — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:01:58 EST

Andy DuFrane > Ron Mexico.

The Diesel

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

HugsFromHarold — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:01:32 EST

Hey, I guess he agrees with Lou Dobbs, and wants a fense on the Mexico border.

HugsFromHarold

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Signal to Noise — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:01:22 EST

@Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies: it's Media TakeOut. Bullshit is a sizable part of the equation -- however, the idea that someone wants to give Vick a physical reminder to stop snitchin' is amusing.

Signal to Noise

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Dany Heatley Speedwagon — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:01:09 EST

Word on the street is the Sisters have taken a liking to Ron Mexico.

Dany Heatley Speedwagon

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

metroville — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:00:49 EST

I figured Marmaduke had people on the inside.

metroville

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Jews For Purple Jesus — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:00:13 EST

@Jews For Purple Jesus: I'll just add that if his protection does break down that the medical staff at Leavenworth is going to have a hell of a time treating all the new cases of herpes.

Jews For Purple Jesus

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Gourmet Spud — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:59:47 EST

@Sir Hotbod Handsomeface:

Close. "MuffDyver", the McGyver porn.

Gourmet Spud

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

racistmascot_inc — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:59:40 EST

@Sir Hotbod Handsomeface:

"dats how it is when you aint on the bricks" - Paperboy64, complete with picture of him smoking a blunt

Can we get our featured comments from here instead of TWWL?...Please??

racistmascot_inc

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

TimBiakabutukaMyLunchMoney — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:59:25 EST

@Its The Beer Talking: Wait til Nasty Nate finds out about this...Naughty Jungle of Love!

TimBiakabutukaMyLunchMoney

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:58:54 EST

Some commenter (who turns into SAS at the end of his quote) thinks this is bullshit:

Quit Lyin MTO! Michael Vick is NOT in main population. This is how you know MTO is lyin. "ADSEG" is the HOLE not PC. In the joint if you get in a fight you go to Administrative Segregation (ADSEG). If you need protective custody (PC)its not called Administrative Segregation. I have been in Criminal Justice since 1988 so I know. Before you guys put out your ERRONEOUS stories you should at least research. Levenworth is a federal correction facility that is KNOWN for its good GRUB! They are served shrimp, steak etc. EVERYONE KNOWS THE FEDS HAVE THE BEST EVERYTHING! FOOD, HOUSING, FACILITIES ETC. Michael Vick is a KNOWN FEDERAL INFORMANT, to put him in main population would PUT HIS LIFE IN DANGER! Parf of the Vick plea agreement was for him to RAT on any and all dog fighters in the south. MIKE VICK IS IN PROTECTIVE CUSTODY!!

Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Its The Beer Talking — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:58:02 EST

Vick's an idiot. Squirrel Master would have protected him for no payment.

Its The Beer Talking

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

JoeyPorterAle — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:57:47 EST

Even the dapper don paid for protection in the big house
$50k to the AB

JoeyPorterAle

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

MattinglysSideburns — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:57:43 EST

@Sir Hotbod Handsomeface:
Ralphus was unavailable.

MattinglysSideburns

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:57:42 EST

@Gourmet Spud: have you been watching mythbusters?

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Jews For Purple Jesus — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:57:04 EST

Since Vick made his living scrambling when his protection broke down, I think he'll be ok when he takes off with his manhood.

Jews For Purple Jesus

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

MattinglysSideburns — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:56:57 EST

I hope he's taken to wearing an Adebisi hat.

MattinglysSideburns

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:56:47 EST

Goldberg has fallen on hardtimes since his days with WCW - a security guard?

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Signal to Noise — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:56:44 EST

@Slothrop: who says illegal immigration is a problem? Mexican gangs: doing security jobs Americans won't!

Signal to Noise

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

DennyCrane — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:56:31 EST

@Doyle McPoyle: He should have chosen Adebisi.

DennyCrane

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Gourmet Spud — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:56:29 EST

If he's worried about protection in prison, I hear a napkin, elastic band and a packet of mustard will do in a pinch.

Gourmet Spud

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Matt_T — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:56:19 EST

Marcus is getting a tattoo of Leavenworth. He's then going to get thrown into jail and him and Mike are going to escape.

Matt_T

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Doyle McPoyle — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:56:17 EST

@Camp Tiger Claw: +Uno, hermano.

Doyle McPoyle

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:56:01 EST

@Sir Hotbod Handsomeface: almost forgot: 23rd!!!!!

/didn't really count, just estimating

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Doyle McPoyle — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:55:40 EST

Well, he needed protection when he accidentally crossed Schillinger, and Ryan O'Reilly reccommended Miguel Alvarez.

Doyle McPoyle

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Babcocksure — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:55:36 EST

"Mira mang. You don't mess with Mikoh Veeck mang"

Babcocksure

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

BadAxe — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:55:30 EST

No, Ron Mexico, dude, cop.

BadAxe

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

SlickBomb — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:55:26 EST

By the way, there is no way this story is true.

SlickBomb

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

SlickBomb — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:55:09 EST

20 million can buy a lot of cigarettes!

SlickBomb

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:55:08 EST

The comments over at mediatakeout are priceless.

Thank god Goodgirl2 let us know that she was fourth to post!!!!! I mean 7th!!!!

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Weed Against Speed — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:54:41 EST

What he should be doing is working on some self-help videos, like "Caged Wisdom".

Weed Against Speed

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:53:45 EST

@Slothrop: +1

Coming Into The Game, ♪♪ ♪♪♪ #J23 - The Superstar Receiver, ofyourupperdeck TORONTOOOoo BJSss ®

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

The Sports Hernia — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:53:43 EST

Mexican gang? He's a fool not to go with Barksdale or Stanfield kind of protection.

The Sports Hernia

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Camp Tiger Claw — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:53:15 EST

he's paying a Mexican gang to keep him safe

The Mets?

Camp Tiger Claw

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

DennyCrane — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:53:01 EST

Just wait till Schillinger finds him.

DennyCrane

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:52:46 EST

Chris Rock is wearing a nice suit.
/Martin Lawrence'd

Coming Into The Game, ♪♪ ♪♪♪ #J23 - The Superstar Receiver, ofyourupperdeck TORONTOOOoo BJSss ®

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Gourmet Spud — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:52:43 EST

@Its The Beer Talking:

That Bowshy Lom shit? Now it's 400 dollars.

Gourmet Spud

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:52:39 EST

That quote reads like a madlib.

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Slothrop — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:52:24 EST

See Hillary, NAFTA is working just fine.

Slothrop

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Jerkwheat — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:51:54 EST

You're the bitch now, dog!

Jerkwheat

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

DennyCrane — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:51:41 EST

Please. All the guards would have to do is drop seven and force him to throw. Also, they could shoot him.

DennyCrane

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Its The Beer Talking — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:51:33 EST

"Well, the man don't just have to die, Foley. I mean, he could accidentally hurt himself falling down on something real hard, you know? Like a shiv, or my dick?" -- Snoopy Miller

Its The Beer Talking

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

ArkansasFred — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:51:07 EST

This is going to have hilarious, and potential deadly, consequences when the black prisoners find out.

ArkansasFred

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Gourmet Spud — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:50:49 EST

...he's paying a Mexican gang to keep him safe.

Does he call them "Ron's Mexicos"? Please say he does.

Gourmet Spud

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Sh!tShow — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:50:30 EST

If true, this is the smartest thing he's done in years.

Sh!tShow

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Civil Negligence — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:49:55 EST

Ron Mexico should be thankful that his hermanos are looking out for him in the slammer.

Civil Negligence

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

Chief Wahoo — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:49:45 EST

Holy Frijoles!

Chief Wahoo

Michael Vick Not Just Chillin', Apparently

YukMouth — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:49:35 EST

I'd pay 3.25/hr to protect my butthole, too.

YukMouth