Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book - Deadspin Comments

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

icanthelpitimfromboston — Sat, 29 Mar 2008 11:32:15 EDT

@Moonshine Mike: I don't know that I'd call her a she-male, but she looks powerful.
Let me put it to you this way: I'm a straight female, and I don't feel like a lesbian when I see pictures of her from Playboy.

icanthelpitimfromboston

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Talking Baseball — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 13:14:26 EDT

Y'all are aware that Lavin's site is a bunch of humor writing, right? I don't think it's supposed to be taken seriously.

Talking Baseball

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

BicSharpie — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 12:30:57 EDT

Canseco's ex-wife certainly looks like she'd be arod's type.

[www.nydailynews.com]

BicSharpie

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 12:24:32 EDT

Also, Jose says he gave A.Rod the contact info. for a big-time steroids supplier. All this means is Jose left an unsolicited message on A.Rod's voicemail or rep's voicemail saying, "Big Muscles. Call 555 JUZE". Seriously.

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

The Sports Hernia — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 12:15:24 EDT

@Gourmet Spud: Kerplunk.

The Sports Hernia

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Send It In, Jerome! — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 11:09:09 EDT

@Lunatic Fringe: Albert Pujols has no idea what you're talking about.

/ducks

Send It In, Jerome!

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

DirtyJersey — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 11:02:44 EDT

No one can ever accuse Canseco of not having a long term plan. Holding big names back for the sequel- brilliant!

I hear his 3rd book will name Jose Tabata, all of the Clemens kids, Hanna Montana, and about half of the All Stars in this year's Coral Gables Little League.

DirtyJersey

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Bluenatic — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:53:55 EDT

Actually, you're all wrong. It was John Stearns.

Bluenatic

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Wyshynski — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:41:24 EDT

@Turkeyleg: Barry Lyons is not amused.

Wyshynski

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Tuffy — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:41:17 EDT

What Sussman said about Jerkwheat.

Tuffy

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:37:32 EDT

Are we really to believe that A.Rod is the smartest player in baseball? No personal checks for 'roids, no suitcases full of untaxed dollars to pay for 'roids, no other semblance of a paper-trail... If A.Rod is the smartest Major Leaguer, with only an high-school diploma, what does it say for the likes of Chris Young (Princetonian) & Chris Capuano (Dukie)?

& this is not to imply that either of those two named last juiced, just... Shouldn't they be smarter for their schooling?

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Lunatic Fringe — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:29:39 EDT

Does anybody else see the publication date as an issue

{it was an April Fools Day joke your honor}

Lunatic Fringe

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

GreatOdensRaven — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:20:04 EDT

@Turkeyleg: Joe Torre? Huh.

GreatOdensRaven

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Send It In, Jerome! — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:15:22 EDT

@FredGarvin: Mackey Sasser and Ed Hearn feel left out.

Send It In, Jerome!

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

A Pimp Named DaveR — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:12:20 EDT

@FredGarvin: Dammit.....

A Pimp Named DaveR

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

A Pimp Named DaveR — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:12:07 EDT

@shea_guevara: Jerry Grote?

A Pimp Named DaveR

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

shea_guevara — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:08:31 EDT

@FredGarvin: Or Todd Hundley, who was named in the Mitchell Report. It's him, right?

shea_guevara

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

FredGarvin — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:06:20 EDT

@Turkeyleg:
Holy shit - Gary Carter? Or Jerry Grote?

Noooooooooo!

FredGarvin

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

shea_guevara — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 10:03:12 EDT

@7-8 Deville: I would say that since he's pretty much the Johnny Appleseed of 'roids in baseball, he's gotta have some balls to say he can "save" the game. But his nads have got to be the size of craisins by this point.

shea_guevara

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

BigTenObsession — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:59:36 EDT

@Turkeyleg:

Gary Carter is NOT unemployed.

BigTenObsession

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Juancho — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:59:25 EDT

@Crookednose: that's like Paris Hilton saying she won't sleep with you.

Juancho

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

tater — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:55:28 EDT

@Afino:
As a witness to many Royals games that isn't the first baserunning blunder he's committed and it certainly won't be the last.

tater

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Crookednose — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:53:51 EDT

@Afino: You're Emil Brown, who was even non-tendered by the Royals.

Crookednose

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Afino — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:52:17 EDT

And now it costs them the game.

Way to go, Emil Brown. Douchebag.

Afino

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Dieter — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:51:00 EDT

@Wyshynski: It will need Band-Aids to prevent it from bleeding through its designer jeans.

Dieter

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Juancho — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:50:54 EDT

@Herbies_Wingman: I Googled her a half hour ago, and was pleasantly surprised to see that someone had turned off "safe search" on the PC I happen to be at this morning.

Juancho

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Scout — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:50:21 EDT

Has A-Rod seen Lleyton Hewitt's sister? She seems more his type than this Jessica gal.

[deadspin.com]

Scout

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Stev D — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:49:30 EDT

Jose, can you see what you are doing to baseball?

Stev D

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Afino — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:48:16 EDT

@Herbies_Wingman:

How in the fuck do you get thrown out at third, when you're the tying run on second with 1 out in the 10th?

Afino

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Herbies_Wingman — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:45:54 EDT

Emil Brown = douchebag

Herbies_Wingman

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Burnination — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:45:39 EDT

Hopefully we'll get more pictures of his mega-mole. Oh, the irony!

Burnination

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Wyshynski — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:44:10 EDT

That baseball is going to have quite an abscess.

Wyshynski

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

7-8 Deville — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:43:34 EDT

uh..how can the guy who ushered in the steroid era battle to save the game he destroyed?

/shits pants

7-8 Deville

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Herbies_Wingman — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:43:31 EDT

@Juancho: if I were not at work, I would have given you a collage of Jessica boobies

Herbies_Wingman

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Matt Sussman — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:43:27 EDT

What Jerkwheat said.

Matt Sussman

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Juancho — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:42:27 EDT

@Herbies_Wingman: Sure, don't link a Playboy pic.

Still, that does have palate-cleansing sorbet effect.

Juancho

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Herbies_Wingman — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:40:53 EDT

Jessica Canseco is certainly juicy

Herbies_Wingman

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

flubby — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:39:41 EDT

So Iracane, if you're reading this comment, and if I'm not getting through to you, let's get clear on one thing: I hate your fucking guts.

flubby

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Bob Loblaw — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:39:26 EDT

@Scout: I think she used to date Martin Lawrence

Bob Loblaw

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Len Bias Cocaine Surplus — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:36:49 EDT

Shipping Out to Boston... world wide hit?

Len Bias Cocaine Surplus

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Hubert Humphrey Methadone — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:36:24 EDT

Canseco's wife is a stripper?

Hubert Humphrey Methadone

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Scout — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:35:53 EDT

*remove the additional "n"

Scout

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Scout — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:35:01 EDT

A-rod wanted to sleep with Cansenco's wife? That's ridicul...wait, she used to date Eddie Murphy?

Scout

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Juancho — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:30:25 EDT

@MeSoHornsby: I said the same thing about Ann Coulter, and look at how that turned out.

Juancho

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

SlickBomb — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:29:44 EDT

Steroids: shrunken testicles, blue lips, and bitch tits.

SlickBomb

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Weed Against Speed — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:26:51 EDT

I have never seen a photo of Canseco's wife but she must be burly.

Weed Against Speed

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

The Teufel Shuffle — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:25:40 EDT

Could someone please inject Clemens with rat poison and tell him it's HGH?

The Teufel Shuffle

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah! — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:25:15 EDT

I rub the head of the Jose Canseco Starting Lineup figure on my desk every morning for good luck and bigger biceps.

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

losloseeboy — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:25:04 EDT

Kenny Rogers is aggressively taking notes on the animated cover.

losloseeboy

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Herbies_Wingman — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:24:08 EDT

Maybe Arod wanted to find out where Mrs. Canseco got that lipstick

Herbies_Wingman

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Send It In, Jerome! — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:22:38 EDT

@UkraineNotWeak: The low talker.

Send It In, Jerome!

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

MeSoHornsby — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:20:51 EDT

I never thought I'd see "Jose Canseco" and "#1 New York Times bestselling author" together and NOT have it be a joke.

MeSoHornsby

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Bluenatic — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:20:50 EDT

From what I understand, those aren't the only names. Canseco also apparently has "juice" on a presently unemployed former All-Star catcher of the New York Metropolitans.

Bluenatic

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

What Would Kornheiser Do? Presented by Peniston Fuels — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:19:31 EDT

Looking at recent events, I guess Canseco's publishers knew that Clemens was the suing type.

After a month.

And with Lionel Hutch efficiency.

What Would Kornheiser Do? Presented by Peniston Fuels

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

G.G. — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:17:03 EDT

Canseco is alot like "the Boy Who Cried Wolf", in that I never gave a shit about that story, either.

G.G.

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

pr0FF'3ss0r_j'3rkwh3at — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:16:42 EDT

YE SHANT SULLY THE NAME OF THE BIG TILDE!

pr0FF'3ss0r_j'3rkwh3at

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

KittyLitterKing — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:16:41 EDT

I refuse to believe the A-rod story until I see the size of Mrs. Canseco's biceps.

KittyLitterKing

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Triple B — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:16:06 EDT

To be fair to A-Rod, I want to sleep with Canseco's ex-wife.

Triple B

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Ray — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:15:42 EDT

If you would have just put the dryer on the right like Alex said, maybe he wouldn't have tried to bang your wife, Jose.

Ray

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Doyle McPoyle — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:15:42 EDT

@Tickenest: And apparently NEVER WILL.

Doyle McPoyle

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Mr. Praline — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:15:31 EDT

@Juancho:
Sounds suspiciously like the Ice T posting rule.

Mr. Praline

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

izzone — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:13:06 EDT

Can Dr. Drew do a Baseball Rehab?

izzone

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

the earl of weaver — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:12:27 EDT

He also claims to have injected Don Mattingly's wife with "fugly juice."

the earl of weaver

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Juancho — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:11:56 EDT

New rule: all Canseco posts must be accompanied by scantily-clad photos of Jessica.

Juancho

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

tater — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:10:28 EDT

@Tickenest:
Or get knocked out over arguing England's greatest prime minister.

tater

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

twoeightnine — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:10:20 EDT

Say it ain't so Big Asterisk.

twoeightnine

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Tickenest — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:06:05 EDT

@Doyle McPoyle: At least Canseco didn't vanish off the face of the earth.

Tickenest

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Gourmet Spud — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:05:17 EDT

I already can't wait for his next follow-up where he names Bud Selig and Omarosa from 'The Surreal Life'.

Gourmet Spud

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Moonshine Mike — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:04:57 EDT

I thought A-Rod only slept with Blonde She-Males? did Jose marry a She-Male?

Moonshine Mike

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

being_sven — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:04:54 EDT

Jose Canseco absolutely adores alliteration.

being_sven

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

UkraineNotWeak — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:04:02 EDT

@MrMoustache:

I'm waiting for his next book to see whom he blames for those shirts.

UkraineNotWeak

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Stay Away From Oprah — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:01:34 EDT

Canseco also recounts a time in the book when he landed under heavy sniper fire when he visited Bosnia.

Stay Away From Oprah

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

tater — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:01:09 EDT

Canseco may be a cheater...but he doesn't stand for adultery.

tater

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Afino — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 09:00:28 EDT

I named my fantasy baseball team "Jose Canseco's BBQ" for a reason.

...what? It's relevant to the topic!

Oh, and the Big Tilde will crush him.

Afino

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Gourmet Spud — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 08:59:45 EDT

It was all a misunderstanding. A-Rod was calling Canseco's wife because he was interested in Canseco.

Gourmet Spud

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Doyle McPoyle — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 08:59:30 EDT

There Canseco was, saving that woman's posessions from a burning building, while A-Rod was trying to give the man's lady his purple-lipped special. Well played!

Doyle McPoyle

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

MrMoustache — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 08:58:54 EDT

Everyone buy a copy. Jose needs money for more of those horrible see through shirts.

MrMoustache

Source: Canseco Accuses A-Rod Of Steroid Abuse, Wife Coveting, In New Book

Stay Away From Oprah — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 08:56:23 EDT

Awesome. Just awesome.

Stay Away From Oprah