Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience - Deadspin Comments

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

drewheyman — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 12:20:27 EDT

oh, and available in Q3 2008 as an upgrade means it won't be deployed by any of the carriers until 2010. Better put a patience ham into the oven!

drewheyman

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

drewheyman — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 12:15:09 EDT

When my Explorer broke down in the middle of BFE, and the local car dealership had only 3 of the worst cars ever made to choose from, if there had been a Tundra at the top of a pole in the middle of a field 500 ft away, I would have thrown a peep through the window to avoid those rides.

drewheyman

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

IchiroSuzukiSamurai — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 19:59:48 EDT

Coach Ditka could hit it with one hand with the wind blowing in off Jamie Moyer

--The Super Fans

IchiroSuzukiSamurai

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Tru-Hero — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 19:26:32 EDT

Everyone needs to leave poor Griffey Jr. alone!!! But knowing his luck, a juicer will blast one up there, break the support wire, and the truck will fall towards centerfield.

Tru-Hero

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

VTBen — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 19:21:41 EDT

"Shit, how about a double?"
-Bronson "Brandon" Arroyo
[deadspin.com]

VTBen

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

izzone — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 18:02:21 EDT

@Carlton_Whitfield: I think I would rather have his pederast van

izzone

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Silky John-STON! — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:59:56 EDT

"There are a lot of parks that wouldn't have been a home run in."

"Yeah? Name one."

"Yellowstone."

Silky John-STON!

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Mr. Guy — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:57:41 EDT

this is very consumerist-y

Mr. Guy

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Secret Identity — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:57:14 EDT

@Suss--:

Someone got tired of waiting for Howie Long to show up and drive him to the gas station.

Secret Identity

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

HugsFromHarold — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:54:26 EDT

Kim Jong Il could hit it using a broomstick.

HugsFromHarold

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Laser Guided — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:44:13 EDT

Mental picture: Someone DOES hit the truck by an act of God, and the alarm goes off. There is no way to turn it off.

RUUUUUUUU, RUUUUUUUU, EGH EGH EGH EGH, BAAAABEEEEE, BAAAAABEEEEE

Laser Guided

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Vizzini — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:26:39 EDT

Anything that travels that far ought to have stewardesses on it.

Vizzini

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

DennyCrane — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:19:48 EDT

@Little Lebowski Urban Achievers: I thought the T72 tries to hit YOU. That one guy at Tiananmen Square won that once.

DennyCrane

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

suntastic — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:18:55 EDT

A-Rod could hit it if he were promised Jessica Canseco.

suntastic

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Mr. Sparkle — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:16:26 EDT

The Chinese have a similar deal at their Olympic stadium, only it's a T72 tank and if you look at it wrong, they send it to your province.

Mr. Sparkle

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Len Bias Cocaine Surplus — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:14:22 EDT

Wily Mo Pena would also require 200 pitches to make contact with one.

Len Bias Cocaine Surplus

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

jmjonesjr — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:02:05 EDT

Bill Brasky once hit a Cuban trying to emigrate to the US on a raft...while hitting cleanup for the Toledo Mud Hens

jmjonesjr

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

BabyGorilla — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:01:40 EDT

Hit Bull Win Steak: This right up your alley!

BabyGorilla

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Hextall454 — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:01:38 EDT

That seems like one of the last good places to stand there, bud. What could possibly go wrong?

Hextall454

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

MattinglysSideburns — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:01:06 EDT

Ken Griffey Jr. fractured his C4 craning his neck to look at it.

MattinglysSideburns

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Whitey Fisk — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:00:56 EDT

Odds of hitting truck = Reds division title hopes

Whitey Fisk

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Weed Against Speed — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:00:32 EDT

Screw the truck. If I won that promotion, I would insist that I be allowed to stomp the shit out of John Mellancamp.

Weed Against Speed

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Farneyismycopilot — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:00:29 EDT

@metroville: It's already loaded in the CD player.

Farneyismycopilot

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

jwaves2007 — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:00:29 EDT

I'd hit it.

jwaves2007

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

DennyCrane — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:00:18 EDT

@kayceebk: He didn't hit bull.

DennyCrane

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

ClueHeywood — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:58:36 EDT

The Diamondbacks planned a similar promotion, until Eric Byrnes crashed it into the outfield pool! Whammy blammy zowie powie, you just got Byrned! Yeah!

ClueHeywood

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

kayceebk — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:57:58 EDT

No steak?

kayceebk

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

the earl of weaver — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:57:57 EDT

I once saw Bill Brasky hit a Vespa perched on top of the Warehouse at Camden Yards.

the earl of weaver

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

metroville — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:57:49 EDT

Does a Bronson Arroyo CD come included?

metroville

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Peter Cavan — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:56:32 EDT

The Pirates' promotion involves an immediate trade to a contender for the player who hits the home run, in exchange for a has-been and two never-will-bes. The lucky fan gets to enjoy the game at PNC Park, which should be reward enough for anyone.

Peter Cavan

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Brazil Thrill — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:55:44 EDT

Guy A: "It's gonna hit that truck!"
Guy B: "There's... no... need... to... swear!"

Brazil Thrill

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

strong like bull smart like tractor — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:54:55 EDT

@BloggyMcBlogBlog: @muggsybogues: It's much funnier if you read muggsy's post as a response to the question posed by Mr. McBlogBlog.

strong like bull smart like tractor

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

hockalees — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:54:03 EDT

The Texas Rangers have a similar promotion this year, except that they park a Toyota truck behind the plate when the visitors are batting.

hockalees

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Rob Iracane — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:53:15 EDT

@Weed Against Speed: Bukkake party?

Rob Iracane

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

DennyCrane — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:52:56 EDT

@jmjonesjr: In Tecmo Bowl, maybe.

DennyCrane

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Steve Trachsel, Ace — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:52:44 EDT

The Orioles were going to do the same promotion, but they traded the truck for four Segways and a build your own cessna kit.

Steve Trachsel, Ace

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

DennyCrane — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:52:38 EDT

@Weed Against Speed: Alyssa Milano?

DennyCrane

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

jmjonesjr — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:52:18 EDT

Bo Jackson could do it.

jmjonesjr

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Weed Against Speed — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:51:40 EDT

Imagine what a fan might win if a Twin hit this.

Weed Against Speed

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Rob Iracane — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:51:27 EDT

The Cubs have a same deal with Jon Lieber's truck, except the catch is that you have to avoid hitting the behemoth to win it.

Rob Iracane

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Tomato and Basil McRae — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:51:20 EDT

"Also: We will sell our soul to Satan."

But isn't your soul already the legal property of Marge Simpson?

Tomato and Basil McRae

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Carlton_Whitfield — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:51:12 EDT

@ClueHeywood: It's between the Sheraton and the FCA headquarters.
/anyone?

Carlton_Whitfield

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:50:57 EDT

"A rocket car could do it."

UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Matt Sussman — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:50:27 EDT

Also, who wants to win a car with a dent in it?

Matt Sussman

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Gourmet Spud — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:50:27 EDT

@Suss--:

Heh heh.

And what's the deal with them always going to the bathroom together? Is it so they can plot how they are going to hide from me the fact that Sarah was cheating ON ME WITH MY BEST FRIEND FOR THREE MONTHS WITHOUT ME KNOWING!?! WHAT, YOU DIDN'T THINK I'D FIND OUT? HE WAS MY ROOMMATE, YOU STUPID SPOILED WHO...

/mic cuts out

Gourmet Spud

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

DennyCrane — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:49:58 EDT

Patience, Highlander. You have done well. But it'll take time. You are generations being born and dying. You are at one with all living things. Each man's thoughts and dreams are yours to know. You have power beyond imagination. Use it well, my friend.

DennyCrane

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Stev D — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:49:42 EDT

The New York Mets have a promotion where if you hit Matthew Broderick's car, you die.

Stev D

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Farneyismycopilot — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:49:37 EDT

What about in batting practice? Sosa dented the roof of the black shed in center back in 2004 during batting practice ... granted it was Sosa and his bat was corked.

Farneyismycopilot

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Rob Iracane — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:49:26 EDT

If anyone does hit it, the truck will topple directly onto Griffey's femur.

Rob Iracane

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Sheepblog — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:49:22 EDT

Canseco thrilled he is the reason the truck is so high and far and stuff.

Sheepblog

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Matt Sussman — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:49:11 EDT

The Cardinals are also hoisting a truck up outside the stadium, but it'll come down only when Tony LaRussa blows into a certain tube.

Matt Sussman

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

muggsybogues — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:49:07 EDT

SCIENCE!

muggsybogues

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

BloggyMcBlogBlog — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:48:41 EDT

Why would you sell your soul to a hockey player?

BloggyMcBlogBlog

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Glass_Family — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:48:17 EDT

Dusty Baker immediately demoted the truck to a used car dealership and replaced it with Corey Patterson.

Glass_Family

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Chief Wahoo — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:48:07 EDT

Funny, it's also physically impossible for the Reds to make the playoffs. It's a scientific fact.

Chief Wahoo

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Carlton_Whitfield — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:47:43 EDT

Uncle Rico could do it.
/sorry

Carlton_Whitfield

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

ClueHeywood — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:47:14 EDT

In a similar move, the Royals have placed a 1981 Dodge Omni hatchback in nearby Independence, Mo.

ClueHeywood

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Gourmet Spud — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:46:13 EDT

I'm holding my own promotion: the first fan to smash up Robert Castellini's car with a bat for allowing this stupid promotion will be given mad props.*

*Mad props will not be honoured.

Gourmet Spud

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

crazyjoedavola — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:46:03 EDT

Pink or yellow Peeps? Also, I prefer them stale.

crazyjoedavola

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Matt Sussman — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:46:01 EDT

Bonus prizes are awarded if the ball lands in a 3-inch area that includes the Chiclets but not the erasers.

Matt Sussman

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

ChiSwede — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:45:54 EDT

Sounds like a job for steroids!

ChiSwede

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

AwfulAnnouncing — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:45:53 EDT

Doesn't that imply that you HAVEN'T already sold your soul to the devil. To which I say Shenaigans!!!

AwfulAnnouncing

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

DennyCrane — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:45:46 EDT

What, no Cadbury eggs?

DennyCrane

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

phillas — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:45:25 EDT

hopefully the soul of Marge Schott will haunt the damn thing

phillas

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Weed Against Speed — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:44:35 EDT

Ovechkin probably could put a puck through the back window of that truck if it was on Mars.

Weed Against Speed

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Dead Wrestlers Society — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:44:15 EDT

Cerrano could hit it...unless they threw him a curveball.

Dead Wrestlers Society

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Bluenatic — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:44:08 EDT

Who remembers the "HIT THIS SIGN AND WE'LL PAINT YOUR HOUSE" sign they used to have in the top right corner of the Shea Stadium scoreboard back in the 80s? I don't think anybody ever hit that one, either.

Bluenatic

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Lindsay Lohans Left Boob — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:43:42 EDT

Is that truck bed filled with Skyline chili? If so, I will rig this contest so fast...so help God...

Lindsay Lohans Left Boob

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Barry Lutz — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:43:40 EDT

Ankiel will hit that truck 40 times this year.[/MatthewRotoGuy]

Barry Lutz

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Matt Sussman — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:43:26 EDT

How did they get the truck up there? Did they just let a woman drive it? Am I right guys?

Matt Sussman

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

Im Hafner the man I used to be back when I was using PEDs — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:43:00 EDT

Bring back steroids people. This is only a few short cycles of winstrol away from being a reality for some lucky redneck.

Im Hafner the man I used to be back when I was using PEDs

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

twoeightnine — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:42:24 EDT

Someone better alert the marketing department, they were hoping to give away a truck or two a game.

twoeightnine

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

7-8 Deville — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:41:54 EDT

I am Omnipotent! You must respect my AUTHORITI!

7-8 Deville

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

asliceofbacon — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:41:45 EDT

win a new truck, buff the huge dent for days, sounds like a deal.

asliceofbacon

Hit This Truck, Win The Power Of Omniscience

RagingRomones — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:39:24 EDT

Time to bring back the aluminum bats and win some lucky fan a new truck.

RagingRomones