<![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels - Deadspin Comments]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels - Deadspin Comments]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Secret Identity: In 1998, the Red Wings didn't have Mike Vernon or Vladimir Konstantinov. In 2000, the Stars endured injury-plagued seasons from Nieuwendyk and Lehtinen, but still made the finals. I think you overrate the contributions of Selanne, Niedermayer and Giguere if their age-related deterioration/natural seesawing of form becomes the difference between a first round exit and a championship. Selanne and Niedermayer also had an extended vacation. Whether that benefitted them or hurt them is unknowable, but an injury to Perry and the absence of McDonald also shouldn't have been enough to damn the team to post-season inadequacy. One injury and one personnel change exposed the team as lucky to have won last year and, obviously, all teams need those intangibles and that bit of luck to win, but the worthy ones generally have an abundance of depth and talent to compensate. Anaheim, quite clearly, didn't, and it wasn't some mammoth performance from the opposition that beat them (like Detroit-Anaheim in 2003, or Philly-New Jersey in 2004), but a workmanlike snoozefest from the Dallas Stars. In a useless hypothetical matchup against, say, the 84 Oilers, the 07 Ducks get trounced.

The Joy of Cesc

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @The Joy of Cesc:

Plus Selanne and Niedermayer are another year older and less motivated, Corey Perry was injured, they traded Andy McDonald for the ancient Doug Weight to save cap space, Giguere regressed a little bit, they had the usual Stanley Cup hangover...

Who was the last team of "mythic supermen" to win the Cup? The '94 Rangers?

Secret Identity

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Secret Identity: Last year's Ducks side was a weak franchise, built of middling overachievers and a solid, though slightly overrated, defensive corps, who got very lucky and peaked at just the right time. Statistically, the entire lineup was unremarkable, and beating the Wild, Canucks and an overhyped Red Wings team (which I say, reluctantly, as a Detroit native) en route to the juggernaut that was a Ray Emery anchored Senators side does not a bona fide champion make. We want mythic supermen to hoist the cup, not as Al Czervik's Ride so astutely observed, the likes of Ryan Getzlaf. Practically the same lineup's capitulation to a similarly boring and flaccid Stars side confirms last year's deficiencies in spite of a lucky 16-6 record.

The Joy of Cesc

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Afino:
Tomas Holmstrom's back thanks the Lord.

Dr Steve Brule

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Al Czerviks Ride:

I'm sorry, you don't think last year's Ducks were a good team? Was their 16-6 playoff record somehow a mirage?

Secret Identity

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Al Czerviks Ride: I didn't know Getzlaff played for the Canadiens.

dirty foreigner

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @LUCIC FOR PRESIDENT: That game was amazing.

dirty foreigner

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Secret Identity: And by awesomeness you mean complete highway robbery. The best thing about Ryan Getzlaff is the dude's ability to dive on contact, second only to Peter Forsberg.

Al Czerviks Ride

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Al Czerviks Ride:

But a Pronger-less rest of the playoffs is utterly tremendous!

I think that's something 99% of hockey fans can all agree on. Good job.

Afino

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @The Joy of Cesc:

This of course is nonsense. You're aware that not only have Cup winners missed the playoffs, but that this year's Ducks losing in the first round doesn't diminish the awesomeness of last year's team?

Secret Identity

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Who else came here to recover from the Santonio Holmes post?

1980 David Bowie From The Music Video Ashes To Ashes

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Al Czerviks Ride: The next stop on the Darren McCarty reunion tour should definitely be in Colorado. Can Colorado transfer Claude Lemieux's contract from Pros Vs. Joes to complete the circle?

Fateric2000

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Either way the season goes for the Canadians, the team has a bright future as Canada's Olympic Diving team, eh?

FriendsLikeJimRome

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> yeah, game 6 on saturday was the best hockey game i've ever been to. go bruins. three years of season tickets finally paid off with one game so awesome i wanted to have sex with it.

madktdisease

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> What carnival has a Be The Next St. Pauli Girl pageant?

JoeyBellesGPS

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Scoring from 100 ft is good.
Beating Nashville and advancing is better.
But a Pronger-less rest of the playoffs is utterly tremendous!
@Yostal: Who do you want to see in game 2? The stinkin Avs or the crappy Flames?

Al Czerviks Ride

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Little did we know that Nicklas Lidstrom's biggest asset to the Wings was his ability to score fortuitous momentum-shifting goals from over 100 feet out.

Also, on their showing against Dallas, the Ducks are a lock with Carolina for the worst team to ever win the title. NHL Parity: Devaluing the Stanley Cup since 2006.

The Joy of Cesc

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @blastitbiggs: *next pic in the series

blastitbiggs

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> The other pic is the girl looking over the shoulder at you with her hands behind her with the pretzel acting as handcuffs.

blastitbiggs

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Afino: I highly recommend clicking the FHF link, for this is part of what God says:

DON'T YOU EAT A FUCKING PORK RIB AND CALL YOURSELF SHLOMO, CAREY PRICE. YOU'VE BEEN A FUCKING FISH OUT THERE. A FUCKING FISH.

Delicious Pundit

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Eh, I guess there's always Montreal. Right?

Go to hell, Hextall454.

/refuses to drink out of now-cursed "Coupe Stanley 1986" mug

Delicious Pundit

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Hall of Famer Whitey Ford now on the field...pleading for...some kind of sanity. And here come the pretzels!

Reasonable Doubt for a Reasonable Price

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> thanks for the pretzel

SonofSpurrier

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @I hate them: I'm thinking the Sharks, maybe.

kayceebk

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> "We were told there would be beer and pretzels"

To this, Fitty would like to add "crackers."

/ Long live: [kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com]

Sherrill-Theory

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Wyshynski:

Nice dig on Strachan (or was it Brooks) there. I see what you did.

Afino

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Yes, who wants salt on their dick?

THEGINOCIMOLICONSPIRACY

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> It's painfully simple, people. You just can't touch a flame when it's red hot. In other words, fuck off San Jose.

Lanny's Mustache Rides

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Those pretzels are making me thirsty.

Whitey Fisk

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @crazyjoedavola: word.

Let's see. I think Im on Calgary's bandwagon. Which means they will lose soon.

Shorty

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Hey, I actually gambled well! My Round 2, Game 2 playoff tickets at the Joe actually have value now! Woo and/or hoo!

Yostal

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Weed Against Speed:

Peter: Hey, you watch the ticker. I'm gonna go microwave a bagel and have sex with it.
Quagmire: Butter's in the fridge!

Chamomiles Davis

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Perhaps the Rangers should make Avery a healthy scratch in their matchups against the devils.
Any predictions for the West people?

FirstDerivative

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies: when someone shows you a photo of their kid, what they don't want to hear is "yeah, i got some photos of your kid, too"

/demetri martin

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Summer-of-George: pink-shirted ass

/grandma's boy'd

Good (creepy) job getting a pic of someone's kid

Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> You can't touch a pretzel when it's red hot.

Spanish Necktie

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> I would love to take that thing apart, spread something warm all over it and just go to town. And then if the girl's still there, maybe we'll get some coffee.

Devils in 9!

Wyshynski

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @crazyjoedavola: Battlin' Billy would also have impaled Avery with his own stick if he tried that horseshit.

McCroskey

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> I had another pink shirt in front of me at the Avs/Wild game on Saturday...but this one was different...

[picasaweb.google.com]

Summer-of-George

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Chamomiles Davis: Is that some sort of sexual euphemism? If so, what does it mean?

Weed Against Speed

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies: Butter's in the fridge.

Chamomiles Davis

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @kayceebk: Whoever plays the Rangers? Thats my plan.

Billy Smith won 4 cups, is in the hall of fame, and never shook a hand after a playoff series, win or lose. Brodeur gets shit for not shaking the hand of Sean Avery. I say to you good sir, Fuck Sean Avery.

crazyjoedavola

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @kayceebk:

I'd figure you'd root for whoever the Rangers play in the next round.

Secret Identity

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Hey pal, no "The Sound of Music" references are allowed in hockey!

drewheyman

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @kayceebk: The pretzel.

Reasonable Doubt for a Reasonable Price

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Sir Hotbod Handsomeface: Say what you want, but to me Owen Nelson will always be the guy that provided quality assurance on SimCopter.

Owen Nelson

Baudolino

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> So the Devils, Niedermayer and Lemaire are all out. Now who am I gonna root for?

kayceebk

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @sharknut: Not everyone is perfect like you, sharknut.

And it's not lack of knowledge, it's poor spelling skills and a typographical error.

Weed Against Speed

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Chamomiles Davis: Yes to the pretzel as well

Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Secret Identity: No no no - Owen Nelson was one of the brothers in that crappy quasi-hair band from the 80s.

Sir Hotbod Handsomeface

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Secret Identity: No, that was Willie Nelson.

Reasonable Doubt for a Reasonable Price

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> And I thought Owen Nelson was the guy from You, Me and Dupree who tried to off himself?

Secret Identity

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Is that picture from the German version of The Hills? It's pretty much the same as the American version, but with way more dungeon porn thrown in.

Doyle McPoyle

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> @Afino:

Dan Cloutier nods from some random minor league team's dressing room.

Secret Identity

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Marty didn't shake because he missed Avery's hand and let it get past him.

Chief Wahoo

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> So, the closer rips Sharks fans for lack of knowledge right after he can't identify former Shark Owen NOLAN and can't spell MIIKKA correctly.

Dave Coulier says that's ironic, dontcha think?

sharknut

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> God has spoken to Carey Price

and told him to stop letting in soft goals or he's going to be drawn and quartered in Montreal.

Afino

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Yes! and Yes!

Poor Dan Ellis though. No goalie would have stopped that.

Afino

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Just 12 more wins to go for Joe Fucking Sakic

BabaOje

]]> <![CDATA[We Were Told There Would Be Beer And Pretzels]]> Yes, pretzel.

Chamomiles Davis

]]>