<![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com - Deadspin Comments]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com - Deadspin Comments]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> This cannot be real.

LenPasquarelli'sStretchMarks

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Smash Bros > Bang Bros

Nationalcoholic

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> But Internet likes to be abused. She's into that shit.

Botswana Meat Commission FC

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> I'm sorry, but TO's reputation can only be enhanced by appearing in porn. Or "Porn."

IchiroSuzukiSamurai

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> The only Porn TO is in... Is Gay Porn, and as a bottom, at that. As a wise man once said in regardsw to TO's "outing" of Jeff Garcia "Whoever smelt it, dealt it- even moreso when they do push ups and sittups in front of thousands of men wearing spandex body-suits."
.
Oh, and that letter's fake.



Bullet_Tooth_Tony

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> You'd think TO could hire competent staff with all of those "reasons to live," wouldn't you?

buttons

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> pacman approves!

mooses_mixup

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @supermike5alive: The point was for the barrister.

RachelRayIsTheDevil

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Am I misreading that, or is there a typo in the second to last sentence of the first paragraph?

"While your suggest..." is what I'm seeing. My computer is a piece, so maybe the picture's not clear.

DanzaSlap

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Next up, "My Sister's Hot Friend" will feature Jose Canseco wielding some nunchakus in the background.

Dave J.

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @supermike5alive: nice catch, brah. now, i'll amend my post to insert "this is how all laywers are, dude" to replace all of my uses of "like that." in retrospect, i should have caveated my assertion as a paraphrase. if you want to argue that the two do not have the same meaning in that context go ahead, but, my point still is that the lawyer's letter sucks Santonio Holmes dick and fails to make cogent arguments.

The Fan’s Attic

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @The Fan's Attic: hi. not only did you falsely quote me, but THEN you followed up the made up quote with "whatever that means"... referring to your own made up quote!

some lawyer you are. just like all the others.

supermike5alive

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> You would think a big shot lawyer would have a more professional email address than an AOL account.

SEC gal

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Dude, Yes (for the art/monetary compensation), Crazy dude
/Obligatory

Patchy Drizzle

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @Senators Lost Cojones: I thought the same thing. All of a sudden TO and Matt are in the Bangbros Pro Bowl.
I would think TO would have millions of reasons to not do porn.


ImAManImForty

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @RachelRayIsTheDevil: +1 good point giving there!

supermike5alive

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @supermike5alive: @The Fan's Attic: He's got a point. A lawyer gave me herpes, then he raised my insurance prices.

AkAggie

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @The Fan's Attic: and I like how you attribute the quote that all lawyers are "like that" to me - in quotes - when I never said anything of the sort.

some lawyer you are. just like all the others.

supermike5alive

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @UkraineNotWeak: Bang Bros. > Steiner Bros. > Bash Bros.

NovakAintNoJokovic

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @The Fan's Attic: +1 Atta boy!

RachelRayIsTheDevil

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @The Fan's Attic: yes they are.

supermike5alive

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> .......

That was me trying to depict my pause for concern.

Phatty

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> TO looks happier to be in that photo than he ever did to be at training camp.

So, I can assume that the Cowboys will no longer be allowed to distribute photos of TO at practice.

MyronCopacetic

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @supermike5alive: that's funny, us lawyers blame you, personally, for all of that.

and, to be serious for one moment, no, not all lawyers are "like that," whatever that means. there are many lawyers who know how to write well.

i'm just saying, this guy's letter blows. it sounds awful and in doesn't appear to have a firm grasp of the situation.

The Fan’s Attic

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @Peter Cavan: Cases won in 30 minutes or your pizza's free.

Chareth Cutestory, Maritime Lawyer

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Mr. Lerner also specializes in motorcycle accidents and workers comp. You may recognize him from the back cover of the phonebook?

Silky John-STON!

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> "Now, Mr. Lerner, your resume states: '1978 - 1985: Adjunct Professor at Nova Law School.' Just to clarify, do you mean Villanova Law School?"

"Uhhh, yeah, sure. Whatever."

Chamomiles Davis

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> use gloves while opening that manilla envelope. that's one thing ya don't wanna catch.

MenaceIISobriety

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @The Fan's Attic: this is how all laywers are, dude.

this letter was taken straight from Ye Olde Leather-Bound Law-Talkin'-Guy Book of Law Letter Templates.

and those of us who are NOT lawyers blame lawyers for just about everything that is wrong in America today. insurance costs, congested courts, the general Pussification of America, greed, bad suits, combovers, high milk prices, herpes... you name it.

supermike5alive

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Looks like T.O. won't be renewing his Ox Pass next month.

I always thought the Fantasy Land Department would be at 123 Fake St.

André Roussimoff

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> TO should respond with a letter from Lionel Hutz, Esq.

Peter Cavan

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Macky Sasser > Macky Mouse

Dave J.

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Dear TMZ.com and the internet,

I'd like to thank TMZ.com and the internet in general for finding these letters/emails/correspondence from attorneys, which has shown me how stupid some of the people are in my chosen profession. And, for showing me what not to do.

Sincerely,

TFA

The Fan’s Attic

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> I'm surprised the lawyer even knows the internet exists or how to get on to the information superhighway. He's ancient.

[www.nsulaw.nova.edu]

The Fan’s Attic

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @Chamomiles Davis: Jokes like that are a lost pause.

Chief Wahoo

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> I'm not signing off on that letter. Since when do letters from attorneys ever not take the opportunity to threaten to unleash a litany of legal action against you? This guys legalese is some of the worst I've ever read. This can't be real. If it is, dude needs to turn of Boston Legal.

RachelRayIsTheDevil

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @theballadofrickeyfoggie: worst attorney ever.

going out of business sale on all office furniture, legal pads, laywerly sports jackets at 2888 East Oakland Park, Ft. Lauderdale!!!!

supermike5alive

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Doesn't anyone else think it's weird that the dead owner of the Cleveland Browns is Terrell Owens' lawyer?

PeteJayhawk

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @Afino:
He might classify that as "abuse of the Internet".

I'll bet the girl on the cover has a different definition.

Carson

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Apparently, they don't teach punctuation/proofreading at mail-order law school.

the sieve

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> If the tip don't fit you must acquit.

jwaves2007

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @Dany Heatley Speedwagon: +1

We also would have accepted, "It's a pornography store. I was buying pornagraphy."

Senators Lost Cojones

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @ILovePaleHoseandPaleHos:

I don't ever pay attention to a letter from an attorney unless it comes certified.

jwaves2007

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @Carson: He also thinks Coca-Cola is "The Cause That Refreshes."

Chamomiles Davis

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @Carson:

So, who's going to be the first person to sign him up for The Dirty's newsletter?

....among other things....

(hint, hint)

Afino

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Oh dear.
TMZ included the lawyer's email address.

Note to Alan Lerner: using AOL as your business email does not inspire confidence.

Neither does the phrase "pause for concern".

Carson

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> I like that he makes it clear that it is "hardcore" porn, er, Porn. Does that mean that TO will be starring in a Skinemax flick soon?

ChitownChick

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> I thought Al Lerner was dead.

Chamomiles Davis

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Clarence Thomas is praying that this somehow winds its' way to the Supreme Court.

UkraineNotWeak

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Did he hire his attorney at the same place he hired his PR lady?
/Alexander City?


EddieRebel

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> If you can't stand the scorn, don't to the porn.

phillas

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @Wyshynski: Mays dyes his beard with bong sludge.

RachelRayIsTheDevil

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Idiots, all of 'em.

ghostsoftheSCupcountry

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Jeff Garcia just canceled his recently activated BANGBROS account.

dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> This type of abuse of the internet...is prohibited.

It is? Abuse of the internet? WTF is that?

MeanMachine

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> seems to me that "smear" might not have been the best word choice available.

Slothrop

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Seriously, Porn is capitalized? I knew it was important, but who knew?

Spectacular Sam

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> What T.O. really wants to do is direct.

UkraineNotWeak

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> It's all a big misunderstanding people. He thought the porn star was a prostitute.

Dany Heatley Speedwagon

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> "I would appreciate a confirmation within five days of this letter."

This guy does know about the interwebs and email, right?

ILovePaleHoseandPaleHos

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> T>O> obviously reneged no his bid to participate in BangBros' latest website venture, MonstersofUsingHGHtoRecoverfromSevereLegInjuryforSuperBowlThenBlamingDonovanMcNabbforNotBeingOnP.E.D.sandGettingTiredAfteraFullSeasonofCarryingTO'sNarcissisticAss.com

KellyDownsSyndrome

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Can't T.O. visit his ex-publicist on a movie set without it coming across as an endorsement of the movie?

That Bootleg Guy

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Billy Mays approves of this war on the dirty.

[www.lions-share-ent.com]

Wyshynski

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> This sort of thing would only happen to TO.

EDogII

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Why doesn't T.O. just sue them into bankruptcy?

Dany Heatley Speedwagon

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Either this is a fake letter or that is the worst attorney ever.

theballadofrickeyfoggie

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> "It was unknown to him at the time the photo was taken that the person or parties taking this photograph would be publishing it on your website in order to hold him up to disrepute (sic) and smear his reputation by linking it to Porn."

Yeah, TO just thought he was filming porn. He had no idea Nik Richie would be making fun of him on Dirty.com.

Bob Loblaw

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> I like how nasty letters always end with the most polite salutation. "We demand justice or else!" is followed up with "Very Truly Yours." I love lawyers.

Peter Cavan

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Can't be real. I hope it is, just can't.

Of course, when has TMZ ever led us astray?

crazyjoedavola

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Betta get your motions ready!

Matt_T

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @teh_joe: It's Miami. This shit is on every street corner, right?

/books next flight to Miami

ILovePaleHoseandPaleHos

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> He muh coat-a-bak.

/ wimper

RachelRayIsTheDevil

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @ltwinslow: I'd watch it. Statements like that may get you disbarred.

Civil Negligence

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Must be related to those other Mickey Mouse operations out there.

Chones_Chonies

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Reached for comment, T.O said "That's my spring break ass. My spring break ass. It's not fair."

ClueHeywood

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> The TMZ stationary is a little tacky.

Camp Tiger Claw

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> And why is Matt Leinart driving the jeep?

Senators Lost Cojones

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @Stay Away From Oprah:

In this case, I think TO was more than happy to leave the tip.

LosOsosdeChicago

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> @twoeightnine: If you take Mackey Mouse out of the loop, I hear he gets Steamin' mad.

Doyle McPoyle

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Seems reasonable enough.

Dead Air ummm Dead Air

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Yes, nothing says "serious legal issue" like a letter addressed to Mackey Mouse at the Fantasy Land Department.

Carlton_Whitfield

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> This happened to Roy Williams once, but he got off because he was able to prove that he was really just delivering pizza.

Stay Away From Oprah

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> pardon me if this was already explained, but do we know HOW T.O. got into that picture? was he photoshoped in or did he happen to walk in frame or was he involved in the production?

teh_joe

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> What kind of half-assed law firm would stil use an AOL e-mail address?

DumpsterDining

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> i know that attorney. well done Alan.

ltwinslow

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Seriously? They addressed the letter to:

Mackey Mouse
Fantasy Land Department
Dirty Hills, 90210

twoeightnine

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> While somewhat entertaining, I think that theDirty.com represents most of what is wrong with society today

/Santonio Holmes joke

BigTenObsession

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Allan M. Lerner is indeed a Florida Gator... figures.

Stay Away From Oprah

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> I think I need to retain Mr. Lerner for when my girlfriend walks in on me jacking off to some really disturbing stuff.

ArkansasFred

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> C/O Mackey Mouse? So does BangBros have a Furry Department now as well?

HazelMaesLandingStrip

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Bang Bros. > Bash Bros.

UkraineNotWeak

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Oh my heavens. I...I...I don't know where to start mocking this.

This may well become the greatest comedy pyramid in DS history!

Senators Lost Cojones

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> Allan M. Lerner, Esq. is obviously a Harvard grad. He knew that you have to always capitalize the word "Porn."

Civil Negligence

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> So TO doesn't like porn?

Triple B

]]> <![CDATA[T.O. Goes After The Dirty.com]]> I don't know why, but I love seeing BANGBROS.COM on legal letterhead.

ArkansasFred

]]>