Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX - Deadspin Comments

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

DumpDolan — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 13:41:29 EDT

They had an earlier comment about how they have hundreds of thousands of comments to choose from. Don't know why that one made the cut.

DumpDolan

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

Zapp Brannigan's Girdle — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 02:41:08 EDT

@starksgotejected: Samantha once ran me off a Top Chef chat. That chick is fucking vicious.

Not even having Padma Lakshmi taking "personal" requests from the chatters justifies one's presence in a Top Chef chat.

Zapp Brannigan's Girdle

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

Convict78 — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 21:22:43 EDT

@ Sherrill-Theory: apparently you've never taken Vicodin. That shit keep you high as a kite and ready to roll, not ready to sleep. Get your drugs right!

/Brett Favre

Convict78

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

starksgotejected — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 20:20:38 EDT

Samantha once ran me off a Top Chef chat. That chick is fucking vicious.

starksgotejected

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

Dr Steve Brule — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 19:30:54 EDT

How do you sleep at night?

On top of a pile of money, with many beautiful ladies

/McBain FTW

Dr Steve Brule

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

metalmaniac — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 18:50:50 EDT

@Sherrill-Theory: I prefer the eyes closed method, myself.

metalmaniac

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

spinachdip — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 18:14:49 EDT

I remember when Rounders first came out, they promoted the fuck out of Gretchen Mol, to the point where previews said something like "...and introducing Gretchen Mol". But the film tanked and was never seen again until Bill Simmons started masturbating to it.

Then she was supposed to break out again in David E. Kelly's big post-Ally McBeal hit Girls Club. I don't remember how that one worked out.

spinachdip

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

Raskolnikov — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 18:03:03 EDT

Moll's going back to St. John's of God.

Raskolnikov

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

Senators Lost Cojones — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:57:48 EDT

Dear Samantha,

My aces are both energetic and industrious. Call me.

Senators Lost Cojones

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

The Legend of Vincent Tremblay — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:56:30 EDT

well, now we know how ESPN advises chat hosts to politely say "Fuck this shit. Show's over."

The Legend of Vincent Tremblay

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

amorphous — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:44:19 EDT

Isn't Ken Moll aware that excessive run-off leads to erosion?

Why do you hate the earth, Ken Moll?

amorphous

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

Grimey — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:42:05 EDT

How do you sleep at night? How do you sleep at ni-i-i-ight?

How did the Scouts Inc. cat get so fat?

Grimey

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

Fugees-and-Funyuns — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:34:15 EDT

It's hard to sleep when you have your face buried in a mountain of coke. RELAX, RELAX! MY NOSE IS BLEEDING AHHHH!

Fugees-and-Funyuns

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

Matt Sussman — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:33:58 EDT

I'd have to look at more ESPN chats, but what I can tell you is that Scouts. Inc does a consistent job of being consistent in their answering.

Matt Sussman

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

Rob Iracane — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:30:09 EDT

How do you sleep at night?

On a pile of Monopoly money. Scouts Inc doesn't pay that much.

Rob Iracane

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

Brazil Thrill — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:23:07 EDT

Al Horford and Tim Tebow once had a fistfight. Scientists today call the event "The Big Bang".

Brazil Thrill

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

She Blinded Me With Violence — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:16:11 EDT

@I Party With Ookie Cooke On Draft Day: That was not one of your choices.

And I too have a machine that simulates the sound of the ocean, Hugh Grant movie quote be damned.

She Blinded Me With Violence

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

DAGOTRON — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:14:54 EDT

Ken Moll and Frankie Goes to Hollywood have never been in the same place at the same time. Discuss.

DAGOTRON

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

RashaanEnis — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:14:45 EDT

So, Samantha apparently was less than receptive to his offers to Mollify her? Is that what I am to understand?

RashaanEnis

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

JB* — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:13:19 EDT

How do you sleep at night?

On my side, courtesy of bourbon.

JB*

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

I Party With Smoot — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:12:18 EDT

@She Blinded Me With Violence: Intangible ball skills.

I Party With Smoot

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

I Party With Smoot — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:11:51 EDT

How do you sleep at night?

Well, I have a machine that simulates the sound of the ocean.

(And yes, that was a Hugh Grant movie quote, why do you ask?)

I Party With Smoot

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

André Roussimoff — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:11:21 EDT

I don't know, I always thought Martin Mull was a pretty good actor, no reason to flip out on him like that.

André Roussimoff

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

DAGOTRON — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:11:03 EDT

I agree. You should always be agressive with Aces.

DAGOTRON

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

She Blinded Me With Violence — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:10:55 EDT

So after roughly 18 hours of draft coverage, I'm still confused. What's more important, intangibles or ball skills?

She Blinded Me With Violence

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

Sherrill-Theory — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:07:57 EDT

How do you sleep at night?

Vicoden.

Sherrill-Theory

Scouts, Inc. Would Like You TO RELAX

The Fan’s Attic — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 17:05:12 EDT

I'd never have expected him to Moll over like that.

The Fan’s Attic