<![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You - Deadspin Comments]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You - Deadspin Comments]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Clemens is lucky he did his dirty deed before Chris Hansen caught him on camera. Now that would have been TV worth watching.

kurt9988

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]>

Hairyback

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> I kind of like the disheveled look she's sporting. It definitely looks better than the AP photo of her in The Palm Beach Post. Something about all that unkemptness that suggests willingness....submission. YEAH...submission. How did she get that giant gash on her nose? Late night soiree with Santonio Holmes?

RachelRayIsTheDevil

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> She was 15, needed new material for her album, so she shagged one of them there rich ass baseball playin' fellers.

Zapp Brannigan's Girdle

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> She looks like a fat Meryl Streep, if a rat took a bite out of her nose.

icanthelpitimfromboston

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> This is not entirely Clemens' fault. While pitching for the Red Sox he once roomed with Jessie Levis who told him that this was a common, and accepted practice for Red Sox Nation. Which is true.

ReggieDunlop

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> John Daly's shocked that this is considered news.

Card_Chronicle

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> This story is shockingly similar to that of Mike Lupica's last children's novel. Except the country western star in his book was discovered in the Big A Sandwich Shop in Brighton.

digris

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> I have to say I like the idea of Roger Clemens tapping Mindy McCready better than I like the idea of Dwayne Wade tapping Star Jones.

Human_Cannonball

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @Chamomiles Davis: I wonder if her ever used that as a pick-up line.

hotdogwheel

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Has it been established HOW she actually got into that bar in the frist place?

LilJerrySeinfeld

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @Wasted Talent: Which is even better when paired with the next line: "McCready, according to a source, even bummed a cigar off His Airness to give to Clemens." When you are with Monica Lewinsky and you give someone else a cigar, there's not a lot of ambiguity left.

IchiroSuzukiSamurai

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @Wasted Talent:

You just beat me to it.
That's like the Fantastic Four of character and fidelity right there.

Colin White Devil

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Silly Roger Clemens, quit doing your Roman Polanski imitation.

DumpDolan

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Wonder if he licked his lips like he did when he went before Congress?

sidesalad

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> The best part of the story (left out of Will's excerpt):

During another Big Apple excursion, the two holed up in the trendy SoHo Grand and later partied with Monica Lewinsky and Michael Jordan.

Wasted Talent

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> The fact this post sits astride a huge Coors Light ad is just a happy coincidence.

THEGINOCIMOLICONSPIRACY

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Mike McCready > Mindy McCready

Secret Identity

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Jesus can dropkick me right through the goalposts of life if this here ain't the best story I done heard in a coon's age.

MyronCopacetic

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> In 10 years you'll be able to replace the names Roger Clemens and Mindy McCready with Josh Beckett and Miley Cyrus.

SA

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Lurlene Lumpkin could not be reached for comment.

Bluenatic

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Clemens misremembered to check i.d. before giving her a shot of B12.

Fletch F. Fletch

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> By far, this was my favorite episode of, "Cops."

Bad boys bad boys...whatcha gonna do?

The Diesel

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> She's like a Tonya Harding mini-me.

suntastic

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @preciousroy: Good call.

[deadspin.com]

MeSoHornsby

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> I love the use of the euphemism "date" here. I'm sure their relationship consisted mostly of evenings spent at the soda fountaing, using two straws to share a milkshake.

jfruh

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @UkraineNotWeak: Don't Stand So Close to Me.

Clare

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Didn't Canseco say in his book that Clemens was the one baseball player he knew who never ever cheated on his wife?

So, wait, Canseco is not to be trusted after all?

Michael Bertin

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Those Daily News sources are misremembering

Crookednose

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @sassydeerrun: Well played. That's the only country song I know, and the most fun song EVER to sing at karaoke.

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Meryl Streep in "Rocket Woman." This fall on Lifetime.

McCroskey

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @OchentaYcinco: No, but Steve Earle is still alive, well, and making records in New York City.

Tuffy

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> She sure does have a pretty mouth.

Stay Away From Oprah

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> I like what Roger was able to do here. He was able to scout an up and coming star, he diversified his legacy by dipping into the growing market of country music, and was able to thrust himself back into the national spotlight when things began to wane. I like this pick.

/Mel Kiper, Jr.

Stay Away From Oprah

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Sis?!

econdave

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> She probably just thought they were Oxy-Incontinent pills.

/Steve Holt!

Chareth Cutestory

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @Lady Andrea: The last time someone tried too hard to connect rap and country, well, anyone heard from Nelly in the last few years?

OchentaYcinco

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @crazyjoedavola:
18's legal
17 with consent
16 with a note
15 if her dad's in the room...

low five!

Lady Andrea

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> LeAnn Rimes, you are on the clock.

Tuffy

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Whatever happened to 15 will get you twenty?

crazyjoedavola

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> There is a joke in here about supermanning that ho, since she was engaged to Dean Cain...but I can't quite get there.

Lady Andrea

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Seems the Rocket took her "Guys do it all the time" song too literal.

Chones_Chonies

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> You don't have to call me Rocket, darling. You never even called me by my name.

sassydeerrun

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Stealin pickups, Oxycontin abuse & domestic drama?

Now that's playing to your audience.

David Hume

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> "It was love at first sight, no doubt about it," said a source with intimate knowledge of the relationship.

At that point, just say, "Mindy gave him up. I took her out, bought her Maker's Mark until her lips changed colors, and she tossed the Rocket over the side."

Tuffy

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @UkraineNotWeak: Sweet Little Sixteen by Chuck Berry.

sassydeerrun

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Next thing you know, Underwood and McBride will have facial abrasions. Giant oozing facial wounds are all the rage in country music these days.

RachelRayIsTheDevil

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @UkraineNotWeak: Father Figure

Sid Bream Was Out

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> You stay classy, Rocket. Guess Duquette was wrong about ya being washed up.

ghostsoftheSCupcountry

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> So when Roger met her in a karaoke bar, what was the song she was singing?

I am 16 Going on 17?

This Little Girl of Mine?

UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> You should've seen how happy her parents were when the Rocket gave her the engagement cow.

OchentaYcinco

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @BigRicks: Tonight the Rocket let me down
(and let that Mindy come around).
/too obscure?

BreakfastBourbon

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Marcus Dixon is pissed.

Sid Bream Was Out

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> The first verse of her song kind of fits Clemens:

Got in this morning at 4 am, you're as mad as you can be. Yeah, I was drinkin' and talkin' and ya know how that goes. Time just slipped away from me. By the time I knew what time it was it was too late to call home. Stop carryin' on, actin' like a child. I wasn't doing anything wrong."

Lady Andrea

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> ...And this is the first time I explicitly AdBlock an image just because I don't want to see it over and over again.

Brazil Thrill

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Somewhere, Suzyn Waldman cuts a little deeper.

UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @BigRicks: Even airbrushed, I'd say yes there is.

[i.a.cnn.net]

TheLou-Do

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Is that a Rocket in your pocket?

Chamomiles Davis

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @Im a people person. Who drinks.:

i'm a people person just won

ltwinslow

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> My only hope from all this is that Suzyn Waldman is now one step closer to suicide watch.

Jews For Purple Jesus

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @Jubilation T. Cornpone: +1

sassydeerrun

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Sending bundles of cash in hush money? Coach Hobo has taught Roger well.

The Vigilante Face

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> I remeber the whole insane astronaut thing from a few years back-She was so much hotter in her mug shot then her NASA photo. Crazy is always hot. But this one....Oh boy. Crazy might be hot, but crazy and beat up. Not so much, I gues.

oldefreddjung

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Lost commercial script:

Roger: "Honey, is it okay if I give Mindy McCready a plane ride home?"

[Mrs. Clemens says no, wildly gesturing, but Roger cannot here due to bad cellphone connection]

Roger: "Just say the word, and I'll take a separate flight."

[Still can hear nothing]

Roger: [pumping fist] "Woo-hoo! Fire up the engines! The wife says it is cool!"

Jubilation T. Cornpone

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Jerry Lee Lewis is not impressed. Girl's too old and not a relative.

UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> So THIS is what his agent's meant by saying Rocket "developed a splitter" that allowed him to keep pitching competitively without steroids.

ArmansCopyOfSwank

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @RachelRayIsTheDevil: Well, that's a "good thing."

Stay Away From Oprah

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Hmm, is being engaged to Dean Cain better than having Roger as a Sugar Daddy?

sassydeerrun

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Well now it's not that bad, people. He had a 10-year affair with a 15 yo is very misleading. After all, one year in, she was 16..then a year later, 17...after that? Perfectly legal, baby.

The Gizmo from Pismo

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!: @Weed Against Speed:
Mick and Keith, however, approve.

I hear the click-clack of your feet on the stairs
I know you're no scare-eyed honey.
There'll be a feast if you just come upstairs
But it's no hanging matter
It's no capital crime

I can see that you're fifteen years old
No I don't want your I.D.
I can see you're so far from home
But it's no hanging matter
It's no capital crime

El Knob Grande

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @LeNoceur: Look at the pictures of her from '97, no chance in hell you would've said no.

BigRicks

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Well, Mr. Burns had done it.
The power plant had won it.
With Roger Clemens fucking 15 year olds all the while.

throwbot

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> This is our country

Stev D

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Ha ha, what a pervert!

/finishes masturbating to topless photos of Miley Cyrus

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> In Roger's defense, his mental maturity is that of a 15 year old.

Sid Bream Was Out

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> At least he didn't get caught masturbating in a library.

Magnakai Haaskivi

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> But Jose Canseco said that Clemens has always been faithful to his wife. Thanks for completely ruining Jose's credibility.

MeSoHornsby

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Come on, Rocket, you know the rules. 15 will get you 20.

Spanish Necktie

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @Stay Away From Oprah: Yeah, your "sister" has that album and I don't own any Fine Young Cannibals cd's either.

RachelRayIsTheDevil

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> "Whatever y'all, it's not like she was his cousin!"

-Jerry Lee Lewis

Secret Identity

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Will McDonough just rose from the grave, had a hearty laugh and then kicked Clemens in the nuts.

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!: Are you sure it wasn't The Stray Cats?

Weed Against Speed

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @VTBen: Me too.

Chief Wahoo

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Luis Polonia is now a country music fan

RugDaniels

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Mark Chmura would like to hang out with Mr. Clemens more often

Herbies_Wingman

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> No

Hustler of Culture

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Kip Winger told Clemens to wait two years, but he didn't listen.

Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> No, not now and definitely not before.

JoeyPorterAle

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> I'm trying to mentally remove the nose scab, reverse-age her ten years...nope, still not seeing what Clemens fell for.

LeNoceur

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> A 15-year affair with a 10-year old would have been way worse.

Whitey Fisk

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> At age 32 she defines the phrase "rode hard and put away wet".

RachelRayIsTheDevil

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Clemens will now need 10,000 angels to take him away from this.

/sister has her album

Stay Away From Oprah

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> The title of this post made me think it was written by Big Daddy Drew.

VTBen

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @ltwinslow: No, no, it's fine. It's just the whole "getting caught" aspect that's problematic.

Chief Wahoo

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> ...she was arrested after a fight with her mom ... had a OxyContin addiction, once stole a truck and forced the driver to act as a hostage and tried to kill herself at least twice.

With all this material, how is she still not a country music star?

Civil Negligence

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> The NYDN has uncovered EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS of the two in bed together.

Matt Sussman

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> She spent last night in a ditch.

Chamomiles Davis

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Gross! Country music?! bleaaghh

The Gizmo from Pismo

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Did he buy he a cow? 'Cause if he had, he would have had an excuse for the Growth Hormones.

Donald_Igwebuike

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Andy Petite fucked an underage Filipino hooker - but it was only once - and only because his dad paid for her.

Im a people person. Who drinks.

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> I don't know why this is viewed as such a surprise. McCreary had cleverly disguised references to this affair in the lyrics to her hit song, "I'm Fucking An Older Married Guy Who Pitches For The Boston Red Sox."

Chamomiles Davis

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Are we sure Jose Canseco didn't introduce the two lovebirds?

Weed Against Speed

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @ltwinslow: wait,it was YOU who knocked up Jamie Lynn Spears?

SpandexEnthusiast

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Debbie Clemens is hotter.

Magnakai Haaskivi

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> What happens when you play a country music record backwards?

You get your wife, dog and truck back.

Dead Wrestlers Society

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @cowbell204:

The florida legislature is working on a bill that would make it legal to open fire on any vehicle that has one of those highly annoying enormous New York Yankees stickers on the rear window. An additional provision of the bill legalizes using a bazooka on the offending vehicle if the driver is A) making "I'm more important than you" hand gestures while yakking on a cellphone, B) has an excessively groomed "we're better than the Mets" goatee, or C) has a ridiculously large gold chain that is high fashion in New York.

RachelRayIsTheDevil

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> I say, she's a modern day Evelyn Nesbit.

EdFinnerty

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Gee, he says the relationship was "non-sexual". I bet they just liked to get together and sing old Willie Nelson songs. We should give Roger a pass here. Also, he might throw a piece of a bat at us if we don't.

FriendsLikeJimRome

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> having sex with 15 yr old white trash is frowned upon? because i gotta tell ya...

ltwinslow

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> That picture makes me reach for the flyswatter

MattMillenFanClub

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Judging by that photo, her next hit will be "Slump Buster"

Lunatic Fringe

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> The Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints would give a big thumbs-up if she'd start wearing bed sheets.

DumpsterDining

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @Weed Against Speed: If there's no grass on the field, you can practice.

Racists_Inc.

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> ♫ Baseball
Hot Dogs
Apple Pie
Chevrolet

♫ Roger Clemens
Teenage Singers
OxyContin
Stolen Trucks

Matt Sussman

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> I thought, upon reading the headline, that Hannah Montana had gotten herself into some more trouble.

Jerkwheat

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Damn, Mindy McCready's story is so sad, she's not even a hot mess.

Juancho

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> I'm So Loathsome I Could Cry?

BigRicks

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Mama don't let your babies grow up to blow Clemens.

Chief Wahoo

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> "The source says that McCready was too young to be angered by the news that Clemens was taken."

That laides and gents, if I'm an athlete, is the kind of never say quit attitude I want in my mentally unstable groupies.

oldefreddjung

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> @Chamomiles Davis: +1 ice cold Fudd to you

blastitbiggs

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Roger should have explained to Mindy that you have to inject the steroids into your buttocks, not the side of your nose.

El Knob Grande

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Rich Gedman: To Catch a Predator

Camp Tiger Claw

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Looks like she got her share of Clemens' brush back pitches.

Dan Serafini

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> He's got friends in low places

blastitbiggs

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> She's purty!

The Vigilante Face

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Guess she finally bagged her a homer.

Chamomiles Davis

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Is she the one with the song about her truck or her dog?

KOGOD

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Obviously, Clemens believes in the theory that if there's grass on the field, play ball.

Weed Against Speed

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Is that from the very special Mad About You when Paul Reiser got drunk and kicked the shit out of Helen Hunt?

Doyle McPoyle

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]>

[farm3.static.flickr.com]

cowbell204

]]> <![CDATA[Roger Clemens, 15-Year-Old Country Singers, OxyContin, Stolen Trucks And You]]> Mmmmm. Scabby!

Sarcastro

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