Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around - Deadspin Comments

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Card_Chronicle — Fri, 02 May 2008 20:20:28 EDT

Beating up a rollerblader = badass?

/shits pants

Card_Chronicle

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

whodatmaninablacksedan — Thu, 01 May 2008 13:43:05 EDT

That picture would be an excellent print ad for Ray-Ban to revamp its image: We're your father's sunglasses, if your father were psychotic.

whodatmaninablacksedan

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

ImAManImForty — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 17:59:18 EDT

definitely over 40 - that's a man, baby!
[/Austin Powers]

ImAManImForty

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

The Fake Gimel Martinez — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 16:31:27 EDT

@The Diesel: +1985 to you, good sir.

The Fake Gimel Martinez

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

KittyLitterKing — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 16:23:59 EDT

If this guys isn't from Philly, why is AJ interviewing him?

KittyLitterKing

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Amateur Prose — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 16:11:34 EDT

This guy sounds like a jerk. He has managed to alienate his wife fom her children - not just the famous daughter - and is proud of it?! WTF?

Amateur Prose

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Amateur Prose — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 16:10:32 EDT

This guy sounds like a real jerk. No wonder he's managed to alienate his wife from her kids!

Amateur Prose

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

illiniowl — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 16:01:38 EDT

Never pegged Donald Sutherland as a gun nut. Learn something new everyday, I guess.

illiniowl

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Barry White Stripes, Office LW — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:56:55 EDT

@Trenton Makes The World Takes: Mr. Jordan has just won some salted meats and a bottle of Rebel Yell!

Barry White Stripes, Office LW

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:44:28 EDT

@Carlton_Whitfield: Carl Monday & Chris Hansen should tag-team those contests.

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

The Sports Hernia — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:29:55 EDT

Can't wait for this guy to suplex something.

The Sports Hernia

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Brazil Thrill — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:27:10 EDT

@Billy Clyde Puckett: He's a lover, not a fighter. But he's also a fighter, so don't get any ideas.

Brazil Thrill

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Billy Clyde Puckett — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:20:26 EDT

He doesn't always drink beer, but when he does, he prefers Dos Equis.

Billy Clyde Puckett

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

The Diesel — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:17:46 EDT

His Bicep ripped from giving a guy a headlock?

I love old people.

The Diesel

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

King of Pants — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:15:05 EDT

After seeing that picture, I think I may have the smuggler's blues.

King of Pants

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Babcocksure — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:14:48 EDT

The Canseco piece was brilliant.

PJ: "You mean a screenplay?"

Heidi: "No...a movie"

Babcocksure

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Bluenatic — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:13:39 EDT

Next time you interview Jordan, please ask him whatever happened to "Hamlet's Curse" and my $10,000.

How's that for authentic?

Bluenatic

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

kayceebk — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:11:32 EDT

@Captain Caveman: Get a job, hippie!

/jokes

kayceebk

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Laser Guided — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:11:07 EDT

good interview. although I could never comprehend a sports writer saying "i'm not a fan". I mean, on some level, how could you not be?

Laser Guided

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Slothrop — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:09:00 EDT

@ghostsoftheSCupcountry:

Not quite--he's a dead Trotskyist.
[en.wikipedia.org]

Slothrop

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

blastitbiggs — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:07:51 EDT

"I ripped my bicep" is the new "I would have kicked his ass but my chick was there"

blastitbiggs

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

ghostsoftheSCupcountry — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:05:59 EDT

Even money, without hitting wiki or google, that Pat Jordan is a Southerner by birth based solely on the rollerblade story.

ghostsoftheSCupcountry

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Microbano — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:05:35 EDT

@millensdraftskills:

Albom has pubic hair. It grows over the top 1/4 of his ears.

Microbano

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

blastitbiggs — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:04:54 EDT

So we're presented with a picture of a guy with handguns, cigar, and sunglasses, and then he talks about being "authentic" ? He's right up there with Poochy.

blastitbiggs

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

The Diesel — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:03:59 EDT

@The Fake Gimel Martinez: Depends on what kind of bear. And if the bear is named, "Ditka."

The Diesel

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

SlickBomb — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:03:34 EDT

Two guys with balls, interviewing each other.

This is shaping up to be a great series.

SlickBomb

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Weed Against Speed — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:03:21 EDT

@Crookednose: Is he 40?

Weed Against Speed

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Crookednose — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:01:56 EDT

Anyone who constantly tells you "I'm a man!" is either a repressed homosexual, a failed athlete or a man who's irritating to be around. Pat Jordan sounds like all three. Who-wah!

Crookednose

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Rob Iracane — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:01:42 EDT

Why wasn't this an "Interview of a Lifetime"?

Rob Iracane

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

drewheyman — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:59:27 EDT

check it out. his fingers aren't on the triggers. which leads me to believe he brought loaded guns to a photo shoot!! . I think I am going to try to be more authentic, which I think means that I can't say "I'll get the next round!" at 1:55am. Holy smokes!!

drewheyman

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Slothrop — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:59:11 EDT

That picture, as well as Pat's whole persona really, needs more phallic symbols.

Slothrop

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Trenton Makes The World Takes — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:58:04 EDT

wow, you sir are extremely grizzled

Trenton Makes The World Takes

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Im a people person. Who drinks. — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:57:18 EDT

On of Pat Jordan's Mistakes: Co-starring in "Revenge of Savage Beach" after Julie Strain dropped out. It just wasn't the same without her.

Im a people person. Who drinks.

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

David Hume — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:57:12 EDT

@millensdraftskills: Thus explains Corso's Merkin.

David Hume

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

THEGINOCIMOLICONSPIRACY — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:55:13 EDT

Nice picture, Pat. Steve Carlton has no monopoly on crazy.

THEGINOCIMOLICONSPIRACY

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

RachelRayIsTheDevil — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:52:25 EDT

/ selling my rollerblades on Craig's List

RachelRayIsTheDevil

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

UpstateUnderdog — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:51:51 EDT

never fuck with a crazy old guy, especially if he loves guns.

UpstateUnderdog

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Stev D — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:51:40 EDT

Who is this guy married to? Helen of Troy?

Stev D

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

The Fan’s Attic — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:51:33 EDT

Mr. Carlin forgot to integrate the other six words...shit, piss, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, tits...for shame.

The Fan’s Attic

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Carlton_Whitfield — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:51:15 EDT

@josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance...: What's even creepier is that a lot of the entrants look like department store Santas.

Carlton_Whitfield

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Big Jim Slade — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:50:29 EDT

As a person who writes about sports, Pat's the man. As a rollerblader, I'm terrified.

Big Jim Slade

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Weed Against Speed — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:49:31 EDT

@millensdraftskills: That's true and Mitch hasn't even read it. He overheard the interview in Detroit.

Weed Against Speed

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Chamomiles Davis — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:49:17 EDT

@drewheyman: +1

Chamomiles Davis

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

The Fake Gimel Martinez — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:49:00 EDT

Pat Jordan wrestling a bear -- who wins?

The Fake Gimel Martinez

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Chamomiles Davis — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:48:55 EDT

@millensdraftskills: "Hey, I have pubic hair! I just wear it on my head." -- Jay Mariotti

Chamomiles Davis

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Chamomiles Davis — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:48:20 EDT

It looks like a publicity still from "Miami Vice: 20 Years Later."

Chamomiles Davis

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

drewheyman — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:47:28 EDT

so he beat up a guy on rollerblades?

what's next? a gunfight at the quiche store?

drewheyman

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Babcocksure — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:47:16 EDT

"Abso-fucking-lutely. Most have yet to grow pubic hair."

Mitch Albom is slowly trying to backpedal out the door right now

Babcocksure

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Evgeni Merkin — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:46:11 EDT

@Dave J.: @BabyGorilla: @Carlton_Whitfield: Hope he doesn't blow his brains out too some day, like all the other red assed, hard drinking, tough guy writers.

Evgeni Merkin

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:46:10 EDT

@Carlton_Whitfield: Am I the only one who thinks those Hemingway Lookalike Contests are creepy as hell?

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Sandy Magic Jackson — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:44:45 EDT

The Punisher's a sportswriter?

Sandy Magic Jackson

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

BreakfastBourbon — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:44:26 EDT

@Carlton_Whitfield: I was getting more of a Boondock Saints vibe from it.

BreakfastBourbon

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

futuremrsrickankiel — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:44:03 EDT

@MattinglysSideburns: I thought it was my VORC (Value Over Replacement Commenter).

futuremrsrickankiel

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

sassydeerrun — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:43:19 EDT

I thought that list represented who was next in line to the presidency.

sassydeerrun

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Captain Caveman — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:43:16 EDT

Ladies, please note that MY biceps are also totally ripped.

Captain Caveman

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

HockeyMountain — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:43:03 EDT

PJ: Second worst pathological liar i have interviewed. OJ was the first. Richard was a scary guy. A manipulator. He was not an authentic man.

Of course he hasn't interviewed Jose Canseco so I have no frame of reference.

HockeyMountain

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Afino — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:43:00 EDT

@MattinglysSideburns:

Or my SAT score.

Afino

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Doyle McPoyle — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:42:56 EDT

Should have asked the hard-hitting question "How does it feel to be less important in the eyes of wikipedia than a dead British Trotskyist?".

Doyle McPoyle

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

MattinglysSideburns — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:41:24 EDT

@Suss--: You mean that's not my credit score?

MattinglysSideburns

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Doyle McPoyle — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:41:22 EDT

That's how all dudes who rollerblade should be dealt with, regardless of them hitting your wife.

Doyle McPoyle

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

morrisalmondjoy — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:38:25 EDT

When wil Mr Jordan interview Colonel Tigh from Battlestar Galactica? I need to know if he is an authentic man.

morrisalmondjoy

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Weed Against Speed — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:37:34 EDT

@Suss--: Agreed. Do you know how I go about submitting my cholesterol score?

Weed Against Speed

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Jefferson Short Bus — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:36:11 EDT

There's now a new book on my shopping list.

Jefferson Short Bus

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Matt Sussman — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:35:19 EDT

Also, nice to know that Gawker Media is now tracking commenter's Thetan levels.

Matt Sussman

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Carlton_Whitfield — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:35:07 EDT

Jordan has really cornered the "Hemingway's long-lost son look and attitude" market.

Carlton_Whitfield

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Phatty — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:34:46 EDT

what's a typewriter?

Phatty

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

BabyGorilla — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:33:28 EDT

I've read alot of PJ's pieces and at first glance he might seem like a HST carbon copy, but he (like Thompson) provided their own unique narrative and perspective onto a story, a great writer!

BabyGorilla

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Dave J. — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:31:49 EDT

I leap off my bike on top of him and we're wrestling on the sidewalk. I have his head in a headlock, when my bicep rips, and I let go. He jumps off and skates furiously away, screaming back at me, that I was crazy. I told you, nobody fucks with my wife. Anyway, my bicep is still ripped and I never had it repaired. Long story, huh?

Pat Jordan: like Hunter S. Thompson, but with fewer guns, more ripped biceps.

Dave J.

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Free Matt Roloff — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:31:43 EDT

I was wondering what happened to Kenny Rogers (singer)

Free Matt Roloff

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

muggsybogues — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:31:36 EDT

"It's called, being a fucking man, guys."

So rare.

muggsybogues

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

jwaves2007 — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:31:24 EDT

I would pay good money to watch him kick Weintraub's ass.

jwaves2007

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Matt Sussman — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:31:13 EDT

"I fucked up the first gift God gave me"

Myrrh?

Matt Sussman

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

sassydeerrun — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:31:12 EDT

sullen, red-ass, Texas boy...

But, but Mindy loves Roger!

sassydeerrun

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Secret Identity — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:29:52 EDT

@Afino:

Neither does Joe Namath.

Secret Identity

Pat Jordan Doesn't Mess Around

Afino — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:25:35 EDT

AJD: There seemed to be a time when sportswriters could befriend athletes - actually hang out with them, go to dinner with them, have a relationship that's convivial and not antagonistic. Are those days completely gone forever?

John Daly doesn't think so.

Afino