How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't) - Deadspin Comments

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Thundercracker — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 18:23:40 EDT

They wouldn't even send me a bumper sticker for every team for a school project when I was 9, fuck them and fuck him.

Thundercracker

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

The Sports Hernia — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 17:16:14 EDT

Why didn't he squish LeBron's head with his fingers?

The Sports Hernia

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Johnny LaRue — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 17:05:29 EDT

@LeagueofShadows: thanks for the Violent Femmes, too. You f'ed Gordon up good! (yeah, real good!)

Johnny LaRue

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

twoeightnine — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:51:46 EDT

which most frequently was his Milwaukee girlfriend, Adrienne Bryl.

The rest of the time is was his San Francisco girlfriend.

twoeightnine

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

LeagueofShadows — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:35:28 EDT

At least Wisconsin is the home of The Onion. Well, was created and ran there for a long time.

LeagueofShadows

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

RachelRayIsTheDevil — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:31:40 EDT

This guy and the "I've been to every Starbucks" guy can get together and produce a Ronaldo love child for all I care. Give me a 50" plasma with surround sound and a six pack of some fresh brewed wheat ale any day.

/can't be bothered

RachelRayIsTheDevil

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

kayceebk — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:27:15 EDT

@The Gizmo from Pismo: Metropolis is clearly CHI, but I also thought Gotham was NYC

kayceebk

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

shea_guevara — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:19:44 EDT

@The Gizmo from Pismo: Yeah, you tell from the way Batman always screams JETAH'S A FACKIN QUEEAH!

shea_guevara

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

The Gizmo from Pismo — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:16:49 EDT

I always saw Gotham as 'Dark NYC' and Metropolis as 'Light NYC'.

Boston?
Shit. How can I like Batman now!?

The Gizmo from Pismo

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

RachelRayIsTheDevil — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:15:19 EDT

@André Roussimoff: has anyone EVER seen his Milwaukee girlfriend Adrienne Bryl and Mindy McCready in the same place at the same time?

I'm just sayin.

RachelRayIsTheDevil

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Greek McPapadopoulos — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:11:49 EDT

@The Gizmo from Pismo: According to the last Simpsons rerun I saw, Springfield is Gotham.

Greek McPapadopoulos

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

The Diesel — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:08:24 EDT

@The Gizmo from Pismo: Yes, but their, "Batman" is Mr. French helping out Frank Costello with a 36 ounce Easten against some of the statees.

The Diesel

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

PantsUnknown — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:06:35 EDT

@Lady Andrea: Marry me?

PantsUnknown

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

7-8 Deville — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:04:05 EDT

@The Gizmo from Pismo: Only when Superman is in Metropolis.

7-8 Deville

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

The Gizmo from Pismo — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:02:31 EDT

Boston is Gotham?

The Gizmo from Pismo

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Whitey Fisk — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:00:47 EDT

Lebron wishes Chris Rock would stop getting into uniform and standing next to him.

Whitey Fisk

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

thetaxman — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:59:21 EDT

But who has achieved the rare MLB-NBA road trip combo?

I've got my money on Karine Steffans.

/Before Bill Maher.

thetaxman

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Big Jim Slade — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:59:19 EDT

I want to attend an event at every major league park, and never see a baseball game. Where do I sign up for that?

Big Jim Slade

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

kayceebk — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:58:55 EDT

"...his traveling companion, which most frequently was ghosts and empty sockets; he's lookin' at ghosts and empties

/Graceland'ed

kayceebk

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

shea_guevara — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:57:45 EDT

"Milwaukee girlfriend" sounds like a euphemism for some weird sexual practice. Something involving bratwurst.

shea_guevara

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:56:16 EDT

@David Hume: Kenosha & Waukesha aren't going to get you much better.

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Lady Andrea — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:54:24 EDT

I want my honeymoon to involve an entire summer that consists of going to a game in every major league park. I am not even kidding.

This guy is my hero.

Lady Andrea

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

7-8 Deville — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:52:50 EDT

INVISABUL SUEDE BLAZER

7-8 Deville

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

quick — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:52:24 EDT

@Rock You Like An Iracane: almost as many as David Koresh.

quick

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

David Hume — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:51:07 EDT

"...his traveling companion, which most frequently was his Milwaukee girlfriend, Adrienne Bryl

And after having enough of her crap, he boned the daylights out of his Madison, Kenosha and Waukesha girlfriends.

David Hume

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

André Roussimoff — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:50:35 EDT

I like how they qualify his girl as his "Milwaukee girlfriend, Adrienne Bryl." Adding the "Milwaukee" before the "girlfriend" means you already know she weighs a deuce and a half.

André Roussimoff

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

ArkansasFred — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:50:29 EDT

Odd. If anyone knows about a sense of entitlement, it's the Celtics.

ArkansasFred

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

roland_t_flakfizer — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:50:17 EDT

@ASox: Was he collecting some in each locker room?

roland_t_flakfizer

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Chicken Wings — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:49:51 EDT

hmmm.... not sure why Martin Lawrence has "James" on the back of his jersey.

Chicken Wings

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Doyle McPoyle — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:47:42 EDT

I don't think he would have wanted a photo-op with the Celtics' dance team anyway, seeing as it's two fat Irish chicks swaying in between chugs of Sam Adams.

Doyle McPoyle

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

ASox — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:47:27 EDT

"he is assistant buyer of men's fragrances"

well, of course he is

ASox

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Weed Against Speed — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:44:41 EDT

Drew never had to pay for a single game ticket for himself or his traveling companion, which most frequently was his Milwaukee girlfriend, Adrienne Bryl.

And when she wasn't with him at the games, she was banging his best friend.

/could be true

Weed Against Speed

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Jehovahs Witness Protection Program — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:43:06 EDT

Nice to see a blogger get out of his mom's basement for a change.

Jehovahs Witness Protection Program

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Carmen McFanzone — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:43:01 EDT

Guess he's not a member of the "nation."

Carmen McFanzone

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Rock You Like An Iracane — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:42:56 EDT

@BigTenObsession: Have you seen that Witzbold character? 801 followers, that guy.

Rock You Like An Iracane

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

CharlesBronsonPinchot — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:42:05 EDT

@7th Floor King Dingaling: The guy next to LeBron is Damon Jones, and it's actually the other way around (i.e. he's hoping to fellate King James).

CharlesBronsonPinchot

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Matt Sussman — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:41:44 EDT

Drew Cieszynski is not walking through that door.

Matt Sussman

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

TheHogBlogger — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:41:34 EDT

@7th Floor King Dingaling:

Damon Jones does not hope for BJ's.

Damon Jones GETS BJ's.

It's what people in suede blazers do.

TheHogBlogger

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Dead Wrestlers Society — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:41:26 EDT

@BigTenObsession: he's only one degree away from Kevin Bacon.

Dead Wrestlers Society

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

ClueHeywood — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:41:09 EDT

He went to 30 regular-season NBA games? Was this court-ordered or something?

ClueHeywood

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

DumpsterDining — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:40:33 EDT

Why would the Celtics blow him off? Drew Cieszynski sounds pretty white to me.

DumpsterDining

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

UpstateUnderdog — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:40:25 EDT

Celt-dicks?

UpstateUnderdog

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

BigTenObsession — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:39:39 EDT

@josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance...:

Dude, your connectedness index is off the charts! Who are you blowing?

BigTenObsession

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

The Fake Gimel Martinez — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:39:32 EDT

I guess he went to Dallas before Mark Cuban initiated the blogocaust?

The Fake Gimel Martinez

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Afino — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:39:29 EDT

Probably thought he was Bill Simmons.

Afino

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

ltwinslow — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:39:07 EDT

maybe the cavs were afraid he was trying to hurt lebron

ltwinslow

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

Triple B — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:39:00 EDT

The Irish hate the Polish.

Triple B

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

BigTenObsession — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:38:45 EDT

So, the Celtics thought he was black?

/obligatory

BigTenObsession

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:38:33 EDT

I think the players & newspaper beatwriters go to all arenae every season.

/pedantic blowhard like Allston, Mass., own M***** L**.

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you

How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)

7th Floor King Dingaling — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:38:28 EDT

I think that guy next to Bron Bron is hoping for a BJ

7th Floor King Dingaling