Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile - Deadspin Comments

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

IchiroSuzukiSamurai — Tue, 20 May 2008 01:19:52 EDT

Hack-a-Manu: bad strategy in the last minute of a game.

IchiroSuzukiSamurai

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

suntastic — Mon, 19 May 2008 21:34:54 EDT

At least Spurs fans can spell "heckler" correctly.

suntastic

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

mandelion — Mon, 19 May 2008 20:16:15 EDT

As a Spurs fan asked to leave the arena last year for heckling the ESPN broadcasters during the playoff games and someone who danced with Dennis Rodman at a bisexual club back in the day, I feel the need to comment.

No, we're not the prettiest fans.
No, we're not the smartest fans.
No, we're not fans with the most incomes above poverty level.
No, we're not the skinniest fans (dude, tortillas fucking own and taste one made here then try to deny their lure).

But we are a one team city. We are loyal. We do whatever it takes to get shit seats and support any taxing that needs to be done to keep our team going. The Spurs are our team and we do whatever it takes to be there for them. We are loud, we are fierce, and we act like retards on a road trip at the games.

Cut us a fucking break people. We went decades with nothing and live in a state where football is God. We finally have a team (for the past few years) that plays well and isn't fighting internally. They get along, they support the city, and in a place where the average wage is 8 dollars an hour - it's something to believe in. They do free events for the city on a regular basis and they don't look down on their fans. They never refuse an autograph and they never cause hell. (Our one bad incident being the whole Parker/Longoria ticket mess but that's nothing compared to what goes on in our other Texas teams)

So cut us some fucking slack. We know we're fat, we're loud, we're primarily undereducated, but we are fans and we are proud of our boys. Friends who have moved here from cities with multiple teams admit it's easy to get caught up in the passion the city feels for this team; for its team.

For all the doubters, I ask you to give us a chance. Come visit our city. Come grab a taco, get a beer, sit with the masses, and see with your own eyes how much we love our boys. Trust us, as you see above, you don't have to dress up in your best clothing to go down to watch a basketball game.

We won't judge you.

mandelion

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Witty Handle — Mon, 19 May 2008 16:54:12 EDT

Spurs fans go into a frenzy when they crack 80 points. Good for them.

Witty Handle

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Evgeni Merkin — Mon, 19 May 2008 16:37:10 EDT

Man: Get's kind of cold courtside. Honey, do you have something I can wear over this Black/Grey checkered shirt, that would match my tan Dockers, and be befitting of ny overweight 50'ish build?

Wife: What about your Tim Duncan jersey, honey?

Evgeni Merkin

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Patchy Drizzle — Mon, 19 May 2008 16:14:49 EDT

If the Spurs' game can be compared to the dark ages, those 72-69 Boston/Detroit barn burners are going to be downright and god damned paleolithic.

Patchy Drizzle

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

mydogisdexter — Mon, 19 May 2008 16:10:07 EDT

@Hit Bull Win Steak: I will bet a months pay that the Beej is given with the same enthusiasm as her cheering.

mydogisdexter

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Red Sox Monster — Mon, 19 May 2008 16:05:42 EDT

@shea_guevara:

I'm going to say that option D is the best. You described what many of us will look like at 50 perfectly.

Red Sox Monster

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

RachelRayIsTheDevil — Mon, 19 May 2008 16:02:30 EDT

The tubby guy was actually the choreographer for Saturday Night Fever.

RachelRayIsTheDevil

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

SpandexEnthusiast — Mon, 19 May 2008 16:02:25 EDT

Which One is Eva Longoria????

SpandexEnthusiast

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

The Fake Gimel Martinez — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:59:52 EDT

@Gourmet Spud: Clearly, Rick was listening.

The Fake Gimel Martinez

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Keep Your Sox On — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:57:36 EDT

@B: At last! Vindication!

Keep Your Sox On

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

DeepFriar — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:50:05 EDT

PA: Cheer if you like riverwalks and donuts!
Crowd: [collective WHOOO!, quickly sits down to catch breath/eat hot dog]

DeepFriar

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

MyronCopacetic — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:41:39 EDT

The difference between courtside in SA and LA is greater than just one letter.

MyronCopacetic

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

The Zoner — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:37:52 EDT

@She Blinded Me With Violence: looks like a heartattack real soon

The Zoner

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Steve Perry Solo Project — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:34:46 EDT

San Antonio, meet Jenny Craig. Jenny Craig, meet San Antonio

/the obvious matchmaker

Steve Perry Solo Project

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

1976 Oakland Raiders — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:33:27 EDT

Hating the Spurs is like hating the Twins... there's not enough there to hate.

Floppers? C'mon, the league is full of them.

Hyper-sggressive defenders? I wish the Knicks had one or two of them.

1994 feels like it was soooo long ago...

1976 Oakland Raiders

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

MitchKayak — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:32:46 EDT

@Hustler Andrew: He would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for you damn kids.

MitchKayak

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

FEAST — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:32:07 EDT

@drewheyman: @kbjone: Ime Udoka Part Baller part Ninja

"Ime caught the guy in mid air with a fist and calmly continued his dispacthing of oncoming people."

FEAST

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Hit Bull Win Steak — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:28:58 EDT

@shea_guevara: I'm going with A and figure the postgame beej will be good for a granite countertop.

Hit Bull Win Steak

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

drewheyman — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:28:18 EDT

@kbjone: i would take Spurs starters because Ginobli and Parker would be the only Spur starters to lose the fight. i'd bet Umberto and Bowen could win on their own (2 vs 7 bench) as a matter of fact.

drewheyman

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

ghostsoftheSCupcountry — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:28:03 EDT

@shea_guevara: Where was the nightmare fuel tag for the pic?

ghostsoftheSCupcountry

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Brazil Thrill — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:27:54 EDT

@The Fan's Attic: Trust me, the Hawks home games have a very chess-patterned crowd.

Brazil Thrill

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

The Vigilante Face — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:27:22 EDT

Flop, flop goes the weasels, the weasels.

The Vigilante Face

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:24:32 EDT

All those in favor of separate drinking fountains, raise your hand.

dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

FEAST — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:22:37 EDT

@Afino: d-yikes!

FEAST

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

shea_guevara — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:22:29 EDT

Worst Front Row Fan In This Photo Contest. Your choices are:

A) Bored looking trophy wife with solo cup, hoping to parlay this compromise outing with 58-year-old husband into new kitchen cabinets.

B) Guy with Spurs jersey yanked unmercifully over black-and-white flannel shirt.

C) Old man with no fan gear with his fists clenched and arms raised, looking as if he's about to go on a Howard Beale tirade.

D) Pot-bellied beardo with clear plastic cup of $9 Coors lite, doing spastic pirouette of joy.

shea_guevara

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Weed Against Speed — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:21:51 EDT

Old guy on the right: Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum!

Weed Against Speed

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Afino — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:20:33 EDT

I once dated a Spurs fan.

Yeah, that was a mistake. I think she was gay too.

Afino

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

The Fan’s Attic — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:19:17 EDT

@MeSoHornsby: Are you from Idaho? I mean Whidaho?

The Fan’s Attic

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

ArkansasFred — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:19:06 EDT

The Spurs better hurry up and lose. Tim Duncan is really far behind on the thank you notes for everyone that attended his sex toy party.

ArkansasFred

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Hit Bull Win Steak — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:17:53 EDT

Yes, Pavarotti, Peter Griffin, Spurs Fan, Spurs Fan, sure what the hell, old guy

Hit Bull Win Steak

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

She Blinded Me With Violence — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:17:38 EDT

@Rob Iracane: No, silly. I was talking about (what I assume is) his MILF of a wife seated beside him, looking like she'd rather be anywhere but there and oh my God why won't this fat bald fuck I married for money sit the hell down and stop embarrassing me.

That thing you said is just gross.

She Blinded Me With Violence

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

muggsybogues — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:17:32 EDT

Couldn't be pulling any harder for the New Suns tonight. Go fuck yourself, Pop-a-lopovich.

muggsybogues

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

UpstateUnderdog — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:16:49 EDT

Why is the fat guy playing air guitar and doing his Pete Townsend impression?

UpstateUnderdog

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

MeSoHornsby — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:16:32 EDT

@The Fan's Attic: Eye-blindingly white - just like my home town, college, and vision of an ideal society.

/kidding

MeSoHornsby

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

The Fan’s Attic — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:14:51 EDT

@Brazil Thrill: You may be right, but until I have seen evidence otherwise, I will just assume it is like every other NBA arena. That is, eye-blindingly white.

The Fan’s Attic

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

shea_guevara — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:14:14 EDT

I never realized the Spurs played in a Home Depot's lumber department.

shea_guevara

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Jefferson Short Bus — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:14:04 EDT

If I had a T-1000 robot, I would send it back in time to off the asshat who invented Thunderstix.

Jefferson Short Bus

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Farneyismycopilot — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:13:30 EDT

@Gourmet Spud: +1

Farneyismycopilot

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Carlton_Whitfield — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:13:12 EDT

I'll tell you what really has to be stopped. This jersey-over-dress-shirt trend. Looking at you, Guy In Khakis!

Carlton_Whitfield

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

kbjone — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:12:29 EDT

Let's take a hypothetical here:

If the Hornets' bench, about 15 seconds into the game, just flooded the court and beat the shit out of every Spurs starter, injured them for at least the rest of Game 7... remember, this is hypothetical... would the Hornets become the favorites all of a sudden?

Hornets' starters vs. Spurs' bench... who ya got?

kbjone

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Bully Andrew — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:11:48 EDT

Front row, right, old guy in the gray shirt -

"Now you kids, get off my court!"

Bully Andrew

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Phatty — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:11:17 EDT

the older guy in gray on the right is definitely squeezing something out at that precise moment.

Phatty

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Doyle McPoyle — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:11:10 EDT

@Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies: I'm throwing a yes to the seated chick in the bottom left, mostly because I'm desperate and lonely.

Doyle McPoyle

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Brazil Thrill — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:10:23 EDT

@The Fan's Attic: You've obviously never been to Phillips Arena.

Brazil Thrill

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:10:05 EDT

I see 4, count 'em, 4, black people

Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Im Hafner the man I used to be back when I was using PEDs — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:09:19 EDT

@Weed Against Speed: It looks like he's squaring up for a donkey punch.

Im Hafner the man I used to be back when I was using PEDs

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

MeSoHornsby — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:09:14 EDT

I don't even care if it allows Boston fans to act like D-Bags.

Like we need to be "allowed" to act like D-Bags.

MeSoHornsby

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Brazil Thrill — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:09:05 EDT

PA: See Pee Three Woo!
Crowd: *Woo!*
PA: Woo!
Crowd: *Woo!*

It's time for Gregg Popovich to get his for bastardizing the game of basketball on every series by employing his mindless "Hack-A-[Bad FT Shooter]" strategy at every opportunity, no matter what the score is.

Brazil Thrill

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:09:05 EDT

No, x1,000

Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies

Last Chance For All Your Spurs Bile

FEAST — Mon, 19 May 2008 15:08:45 EDT

Game 7 drinking game. Drink every time you hear one of these words/phrases:

Experience, Anything can happen, Confidence, Youth, Cheap shots, Sense of urgency, Adjustments, every time you see the Tim Duncan face, every time somebody 'flops'

Who's with me? See you in jail (or hopefully just a gutter somewhere)

FEAST