There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up - Deadspin Comments

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Dieter — Sun, 25 May 2008 19:39:07 EDT

@Schluby: I understand. I have to deal with students like you.

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Dieter — Sun, 25 May 2008 19:37:41 EDT

I'm really pissed at myself for not reading this when it was first posted.

@Juggernaut: @dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac: No kidding. I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that Joel was a pretty straight-edge guy. He goes to meet Golden Richards specifically because he knows that he was addicted to painkillers and winds up enabling his overdose. But Golden Richards lived and it makes a great story.

Dieter

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Convict78 — Fri, 23 May 2008 21:09:06 EDT

Speaking of "hey golden - hope these help" tag potential...Hulk Hogan's first wrestling name was "Sterling Golden". I think maybe someone gave him something that helped at some point. Do with this information what you may.

Convict78

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

GetTheLedOut — Wed, 21 May 2008 18:27:35 EDT

Hes broke, living off his parents, a druggie, but goddamn, he has a nice leather jacket.

GetTheLedOut

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

NYSportscene — Tue, 20 May 2008 22:13:27 EDT

Kick-ass story. Unfortunately, I don't have anything to share along those lines. The best that I can think of on short notice? Interviewing Paul LoDuca about an 'off-the-field' piece we were doing about him during his first season with the Mets. We had a nice chat about his home life, etc. Left it off with a follow-up at his home with a photographer, etc. It never materialized, and a short time later, everything broke in the newspaper about his 'gommata' and that he was splitting up with his wife.

NYSportscene

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you — Tue, 20 May 2008 20:03:28 EDT

Day in the life of a rock n' roll Utahan segueing into Morrissey one-liners -- remind me I am not in junior year at college. That aside, this was incredible. Easily the best "Dark Side of the Locker-room", almost as strong as Pat Jordan's "hunting Jose" novella, & definitely deserves an Hollywood option. The fact it couldn't get one ten years ago, when 12 Monkeys, Fear & Loathing, Fight Club, & Rules of Attraction were netting big money & bigger cults (for their screen versions) is a crime. Tip o' the hat to you, Reese.

josereyes.theroof wishes to perform Tim Harris's sack-dance for you

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

williamzabka — Tue, 20 May 2008 19:28:52 EDT

@Elvis Stojko: Fucker broke my 2nd place trophy.

/Wrong first name I know

williamzabka

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

DontPracticeRenteria — Tue, 20 May 2008 18:31:02 EDT

I just want everyone to know that I did end up doing the entire thing... had to call Best Buy and hire Geek Squad to come read it to me... but I did it, and it was very good.

Still, calling him Golden Dicks is much more appealing to me.

DontPracticeRenteria

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

lavaughn — Tue, 20 May 2008 18:18:17 EDT

@SonOfSpam: Nice! Back when SNL was relevant.

Richards was just a bit before my time, but my father and I always talked about how Dallas players would flame out in the strangest ways (Golden, Lance Rentzel (boys), Rafael Septein (boys), Alonzo Spellman (depression)), and on and on.

lavaughn

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

StartingAces — Tue, 20 May 2008 17:02:45 EDT

Approve

StartingAces

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

1976 Oakland Raiders — Tue, 20 May 2008 16:09:54 EDT

I met Mike Piazza once. He slipped me some roofies... most of the night was a blur, but man, my ass hurt the next few days.

1976 Oakland Raiders

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Card_Chronicle — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:42:11 EDT

Good stuff.

Card_Chronicle

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Yinka Double Dare — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:37:05 EDT

I prefer Johncreese.com to Joelcreese.com due to its first-strike, merciless platform.

Seriously though, I agree this was the best in the series so far.

Yinka Double Dare

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

LeighValentin — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:36:29 EDT

I remember why you idolized Golden Richards even though he wasn't a star. He said it himself--his biggest moment wasn't the Super Bowl, it was converting a long yardage third down to keep the drive going. That's EXACTLY what I remember about him, and why I loved him too. (And I hated the Cowboys.) Which makes this story all the more chilling and sad. You want guys like that to wind up like you described: running fly fishing operations in Montana and being soft-spoken local legends. What really happened to Golden Richards is just tragic, hurts my heart. Don't even know if he's still alive. Hopes he's okay.

LeighValentin

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Jubilation T. Cornpone — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:36:22 EDT

I love the guy who just leaves the bottle of pills and then gets the freak outta Dodge.

Jubilation T. Cornpone

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

LeagueofShadows — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:34:34 EDT

Ditka versus a mountain, I'm taking Ditka.

LeagueofShadows

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

HugsFromHarold — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:34:19 EDT

@BlakeRedgrave: yeah alot more interesting than the ones where the athlete screams "boo!"

HugsFromHarold

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

buttons — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:33:09 EDT

Bravo.

buttons

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Secret Identity — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:33:03 EDT

Pills and powders baby, powders and pills
We spent the night last night in Beverly Hills
This dude he had hair just like Beverly Sills
He almost got me killed!

Secret Identity

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Hubert Humphrey Methadone — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:30:58 EDT

The best piece in this series yet.

/dick joke-less

Hubert Humphrey Methadone

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

feed_me_a_stray_cat — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:27:53 EDT

As crazy as that story is, it's the one that all young journalists really secretly want. For instance, I once interviewed a man who had shaved his entire body, joined the Jehovah's Witnesses and gutted his house and lived in a tent inside of the house. I told him he was crazy. He told me to go take the trash out and that I was grounded.

feed_me_a_stray_cat

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

kayceebk — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:26:28 EDT

@Weed Against Speed: And I've got no right to take my place in the human race.

kayceebk

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Evgeni Merkin — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:24:52 EDT

@TheStarterWife: I understand that some of you actually patronize Deadspin for the serious, poignant journalism, but there are some of us who peruse strictly for the urinal runs, babes, trainwrecks, and Mayor McCheese heads. MOre than 300 words and I'm struggling.

Evgeni Merkin

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Pete Gaines — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:23:40 EDT

That was a really well-done piece. Thanks for it.

Pete Gaines

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Chamomiles Davis — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:22:06 EDT

T.O. wasn't the first Dallas wide receiver to OD? Huh.

Pre-Free Agency Quote: "Golden Richards has 42,800 reasons to live."

Chamomiles Davis

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Silky John-STON! — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:19:10 EDT

It's less riveting than the story about the Eagles player who snuck up behind the reporter to scare him. THAT tale should be made into a movie.

Also, what's up with that football card? He's got the surprised "oh, just checking for pills in my vomit here..." look.

Silky John-STON!

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

blogsarefun — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:15:35 EDT

@Spectacular Sam: I agree.....it seems we might be in the minority, but I love it.

As someone who worked as a bottom-of-the-food chain stringer/writer in the sports department of a major newspaper, I enjoy these stories largely because they show the shitty side of a profession (sportswriting) most people think is nothing but awesomeness and rainbows.

blogsarefun

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

AkAggie — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:14:22 EDT

And then I said "No you're a jerk"...

Wait, this was actually a good story. It's always been easy for me to find pills in SLC too.

AkAggie

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Billy Clyde Puckett — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:11:58 EDT

Wow.

I had no idea Golden Richards was that messed up. That's good stuff right there.

Billy Clyde Puckett

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Juggernaut — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:11:44 EDT

Great story but what a naive, dumb fuck Joel was back when...

Juggernaut

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Spectacular Sam — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:11:27 EDT

I, for one, enjoy this feature every week. Nice work, Mr Reese.

Spectacular Sam

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

econdave — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:11:27 EDT

Needs more present tense.

econdave

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

blogsarefun — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:09:23 EDT

I'll echo almost everyone else and say this was an outstanding piece. I was riveted throughout.

blogsarefun

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

PenskeMaterial — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:08:25 EDT

Who knew writing could be this good without resorting to purple prose?

PenskeMaterial

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Tuffy — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:08:04 EDT

I miss the old days when masters' theses could be completed about drug overdoses without anyone batting an eye.

Well done, sir.

Tuffy

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

SadJohnson — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:06:07 EDT

If you've ever ransacked the apartment of a friend of a journalist doing a story on you looking for pills, you might have a drug problem.
/Foxworthyed

SadJohnson

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Phatty — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:06:02 EDT

Easily the best of these so far.

Phatty

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Woody — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:05:16 EDT

I approve this piece of journalism.

/Buzz Bissinger

Woody

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Yostal — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:04:47 EDT

More long form pieces please. This was exceptional, if disturbing.

Yostal

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

ghostsoftheSCupcountry — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:03:06 EDT

Well-done. More of these.

ghostsoftheSCupcountry

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

bizzo5000 — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:02:48 EDT

Wow. This is one of the best things on the interwebs in a long time.
I actually read the whole thing. That's an accomplishment.

bizzo5000

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

amorphous — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:02:14 EDT

@Weed Against Speed: And he had very low bulk resistance.

amorphous

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Bluenatic — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:02:01 EDT

It's okay. My childhood heroes (L.T., Darryl Strawberry, Doc Gooden, Maradona) had their share of "toothaches", too. I'm just glad I wasn't there to witness them.

Bluenatic

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

sir_pantsalot — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:01:56 EDT

Meh! That is what they refer to as Thursday at the Kennedy Compound.

sir_pantsalot

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Agamemnon Busmalis — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:01:53 EDT

Pretty good, not exactly W.C. Heinz, but pretty good.

Agamemnon Busmalis

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

kurt9988 — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:01:36 EDT

What I remember most about Golden Richards was he had 2 ribs broken in the January 1976 Super Bowl versus Pittsburgh. That was during the bump and run days, when a DB could nearly beat up a WR and not get a penalty if the ball wasn't in the air. Mel Blount busted Golden's ribs. Amazing, Blount had zero penalties called in that game. Golden gets mugged and Blount was called for nothing. Those were the days when Steeler coach, Chuck Noll, talked about the "criminal element" in the NFL.

kurt9988

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

jake(ymon) — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:01:21 EDT

Wow. That was really good. Nice work.

Demerol, though? Pansy. Hydrocodone's where it's at.

jake(ymon)

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Rbastid — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:00:30 EDT

@DontPracticeRenteria:

No reason you should pass over this story, was very well written and a good little read.

Rbastid

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

jwaves2007 — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:59:02 EDT

Great job. Best one of these yet.

jwaves2007

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Crookednose — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:58:51 EDT

Great read, man. Well done.

Crookednose

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

muggsybogues — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:58:48 EDT

@DontPracticeRenteria: Way to miss out. This was stellar.

muggsybogues

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

DamnSkippy — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:58:30 EDT

That's a little too much humanization for me.

/Buzz'd

DamnSkippy

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

crazyjoedavola — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:57:23 EDT

God I miss college.

crazyjoedavola

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Tom_Bradys_Abortion — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:56:51 EDT

Tremendous story. Stylistically perfect for the subject matter. Joel Reese has gained a new fan.

Tom_Bradys_Abortion

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

BigTenObsession — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:56:45 EDT

@The Teufel Shuffle:

Depends - was Golden Richards a big Sean Kingston fan?

BigTenObsession

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Artie Fufkin — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:56:12 EDT

I am anticipating the day my childhood is shattered on here. Some story about Charlie Leibrant marrying his cousin...

Artie Fufkin

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

BklynJace — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:56:07 EDT

Great story, well told. My hat's off.

BklynJace

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Jefferson Short Bus — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:55:04 EDT

I just finished a first-hand account of the night I rolled with Mark Tuinei and helped him tie a rubber tube around his arm.

Jefferson Short Bus

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

BigTenObsession — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:55:01 EDT

Not to beat a Barbaro, but this was an excellent piece. This feature has consistently provided some really solid writing.

/Richards joke

BigTenObsession

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

thetaxman — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:54:54 EDT

Golden Richards on Demerol >> Jimmy Olsen on Percocet.

Amazing piece.

thetaxman

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

The Teufel Shuffle — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:54:05 EDT

I like how Golden's from the same town as David Archuleta. Is it possible Golden resurfaced as his insane father?

The Teufel Shuffle

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Weed Against Speed — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:52:22 EDT

During his times of weakness, you could say Golden Richards' idea of right and wrong was malleable.

Weed Against Speed

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

The KB — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:52:11 EDT

Great piece. My teeth hurt just reading it.

The KB

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

The White Boom Boom — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:51:58 EDT

These are getting progressively darker. Next week's story is going to involve child pornography.

Well done.

The White Boom Boom

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

The Count of Monte Fisto — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:50:50 EDT

Was it really Golden Richards, or just that guy who pretended to be Golden Richards for all those years?

The Count of Monte Fisto

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Big Jim Slade — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:50:37 EDT

@ASox: My bad... Nibbles betrayed me

Big Jim Slade

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

WiserTime — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:50:30 EDT

"Hey Golden-hope these help!" = Excellent tag potential.

WiserTime

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

FEAST — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:50:28 EDT

For about 4.7 seconds I felt bad about how much I enjoy pain pills.

Then I promptly resumed my never-ending quest of finding more.

Anybody know a guy who ca...

FEAST

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

1_win_per_arrest — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:50:20 EDT

So, can we just copy and paste this for Ricky Proehl in about ten years or so?

1_win_per_arrest

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Big Jim Slade — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:50:00 EDT

@dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac:
Step 7 ...
Step 8 Profit!

/good story, keep em coming

Big Jim Slade

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

SlickBomb — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:49:57 EDT

Awesome stuff.

SlickBomb

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

elijah_dukes_mayonnaise — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:48:59 EDT

@Rob Iracane: That explains the Morrissey poster I have in my bedroom, ummm, right now. It's the bandaid over the nipple that seals the deal for me....

elijah_dukes_mayonnaise

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

ASox — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:48:33 EDT

@dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac: Step 7. profit

ASox

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Weed Against Speed — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:48:09 EDT

@kayceebk: Bigmouth Strikes Again?

Weed Against Speed

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Doyle McPoyle — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:47:37 EDT

That's nothing, I went to do a piece on Wayne Chrebet and that crazy motherfucker was hooked on Substance D.

Doyle McPoyle

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Elvis Stojko — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:46:53 EDT

"...a Chicago-based freelance writer who's impressive body of work can be found at Joelcreese.com."

Why not senseiJoelcreese.com?

Elvis Stojko

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

MeSoHornsby — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:46:39 EDT

I've accepted the fact that after I read the weekly installment of "Dark Side of the Locker Room", I will be even more depressed than before I read it.

MeSoHornsby

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:46:09 EDT

Hank Hill doesn't believe any of it. Landry Cowboys are pure of mind and body and use propane and not charcoal.

UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

kayceebk — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:45:32 EDT

@kayceebk: Yates, idiot.

kayceebk

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

futuremrsrickankiel — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:45:26 EDT

Killer story. This feature rocks my socks off.

futuremrsrickankiel

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

amorphous — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:44:37 EDT

I liked this more the first time when it featured Seth Maxwell and Phil Elliot.

amorphous

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

kayceebk — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:44:16 EDT

@UkraineNotWeak: Hey, lay off Iracane. Keats and Yeats are on his side.

kayceebk

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Stev D — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:44:06 EDT

I thought the some dude's half bottle of expired Demerol was part of the NFLPA retirement package

Stev D

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Carmen McFanzone — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:43:45 EDT

Shit, this is nothing.

I went over to Lyle Alzado's house one time.

No, that's the whole story.

Carmen McFanzone

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Midwestern-City_Water-Vapor — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:43:31 EDT

Demerol... the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Midwestern-City_Water-Vapor

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

sassydeerrun — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:42:49 EDT

@throwbot: The Butterscotch Stallion needs to star in this biopic.

sassydeerrun

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

ArkansasFred — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:42:43 EDT

Golden then dyed his hair and reinvented himself as Nikki Sixx.

ArkansasFred

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Art Monk's Cafe — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:42:29 EDT

@throwbot: Well played.

Art Monk's Cafe

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Im Hafner the man I used to be back when I was using PEDs — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:42:29 EDT

@dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac: Step 7. Profit?

Im Hafner the man I used to be back when I was using PEDs

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

The Fan’s Attic — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:42:23 EDT

@The Fan's Attic: By the way, great story.

The Fan’s Attic

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

VidaBlueBalls — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:42:10 EDT

@SonOfSpam: Jimmy Carter approves.

VidaBlueBalls

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

AppFan — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:42:03 EDT

I usually skip these posts, but I scrolled through this one.

Wow.

Oh, and thanks for the constants (pre-google, payphone, etc.) Now I feel really old.

AppFan

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

The Fan’s Attic — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:41:08 EDT

And, then Mr. Hand came to Golden's house to get back all of the time Golden had wasted in his history class.

The Fan’s Attic

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

TheStarterWife — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:40:35 EDT

Excellent story. (And both versions are incredibly well written.)

@Schluby: Try reading without moving your lips. The piece only takes a couple of minutes to get through.

TheStarterWife

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

VidaBlueBalls — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:40:25 EDT

@PenskeMaterial: I believe that would make it a golden shower.

VidaBlueBalls

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:40:22 EDT

Remind me never to go on a bender with this guy.

Step 1. Observe large man who has clearly ingested a half a bottle's worth of painkillers.
step 2. call information(???)
step 3. ask for emergency drug hotline (???)
step 4. answer yes, he is still breathing.
step 5. have to be instructed to call 911(?!?!?)
step 6. call 911.

dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

ILovePaleHoseandPaleHos — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:40:15 EDT

This is the first one of this series that I actually enjoyed.
Sad.. but true.

ILovePaleHoseandPaleHos

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Dan Levy — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:39:48 EDT

Harrowing indeed. Really a great, yet sad, story. But where was the locker room in this one?

Dan Levy

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

TheDerridaDrop — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:39:22 EDT

TheDerridaDrop

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

BlakeRedgrave — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:39:20 EDT

I'm with redsoxchick. This is good stuff. Much better than previous entires in the "Sportswriters tell stupid, uninteresting anecdotes that bore me to tears" series.

Good work.

BlakeRedgrave

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

OchentaYcinco — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:39:17 EDT

Needs more beer bong pictures.

/full of shit blog posted

Seriously, though, that was a great story.

OchentaYcinco

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

André Roussimoff — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:39:04 EDT

Great piece, and who would have thought Dallas Cowboys did drugs?

André Roussimoff

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

GorgeForeman — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:39:02 EDT

Great story.

GorgeForeman

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

SonOfSpam — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:38:47 EDT

Golden, what you took was called Orange Sunshine. Alright, just listen. Everything is going to be fine. You're very high right now. You will probably be that way for about five more hours. Try taking some vitamin B complex, vitamin C complex, if you have a beer, go ahead and drink it. Just remember you're a living organism on this planet, and you're very safe. You've just taken a heavy drug. Relax, stay inside and listen to some music, Okay? Do you have any Allman Brothers?

SonOfSpam

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Weed Against Speed — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:38:22 EDT

@UkraineNotWeak: Dude, don't be a Bona Drag.

Weed Against Speed

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

sassydeerrun — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:38:19 EDT

If he would have only said they were riding around in a Camaro...
Just kidding, that was a great story.

sassydeerrun

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

DumpsterDining — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:38:07 EDT

@RachelRayIsTheDevil: And it's much easier than sorting thru the peanut and corn pieces in your shit.

DumpsterDining

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

the-Bored — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:37:48 EDT

"I get nibbles from Esquire and Playboy"

Go on.

the-Bored

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Signal to Noise — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:37:20 EDT

Fucking creepy and disturbing. Great story.

Signal to Noise

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

DontPracticeRenteria — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:36:54 EDT

That's why I love perkaset... because I'm an outdoorsman.

Who woulda thunk.

DontPracticeRenteria

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

DoxDox — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:35:54 EDT

Nice piece.

DoxDox

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Evgeni Merkin — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:34:51 EDT

This article must have come from the Unbelieveably Boring and Long Side of the Locker Room.

Seriously, the human attention span is only ten minutes long.

Evgeni Merkin

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

SelfWrighteousMetsFan — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:34:44 EDT

Brett Favre thinks Richards is a pansy.

SelfWrighteousMetsFan

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Dave J. — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:34:32 EDT

(By the way, Mike Ditka told me he hadn't talked to Golden in ages. "See, he lies," Ditka says. "I can't ski-I've got two artificial hips.")

That's how I know this story is 100% bullshit. Ditka on artificial hips can still kick anyone's ass on the waterskis.

Dave J.

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

RachelRayIsTheDevil — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:34:19 EDT

What's wrong with picking pain killers out of your vomit? Dudes teeth hurt.

RachelRayIsTheDevil

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Clare — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:34:16 EDT

Wow. That was chilling. I can't imagine how horrifying it'd be to meet your idol, procure drugs for him, and then watch him OD.

Really well written.

Clare

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:32:35 EDT

@Rob Iracane:

What explains it still being there?

UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

redsoxchick — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:31:25 EDT

I have no dick joke.

This is the best thing I've ever read on Deadspin.

And the first of these that didn't come off as whiny or self-serving.

Christ, what a nightmare.

redsoxchick

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Rob Iracane — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:30:44 EDT

undoubtedly, there were some homoerotic stirrings in my prepubescent loins that I'd rather leave alone.

This explains the Morrissey poster I had in my bedroom at age 12.

Rob Iracane

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

throwbot — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:30:42 EDT

This new Owen Wilson movie "Golden Richards" looks horrible.

throwbot

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

PenskeMaterial — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:30:42 EDT

So let's say you had to throw Golden Richards into a cold shower to help him shake off the effects of a painkiller overdose.

/I'll stop there

PenskeMaterial

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

Afino — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:29:29 EDT

He's wearing a white button-down shirt and Wrangler blue jeans, and he stands under six feet. He's still got the long blond hair (rocking a slight mullet, I hesitantly realize), and he looks weathered and tired.

You sure this was Golden Richards or Brett Favre?

Afino

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

The Orange Naranja — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:25:20 EDT

Replace "Golden Richards" with "Candy Maldonado" and I might have read the whole post.

The Orange Naranja

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up

DontPracticeRenteria — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:25:02 EDT

Golden Dicks.

didn't feel like reading.

DontPracticeRenteria