What to watch as you fortify your home against an invasion of our nation's "disappearing" bees ...
• Boxing: Junior middleweights, Yory Boy Campas vs. Eromosele Albert, at Miami. Loser must kiss Don King on the lips. [ESPN2]
• MLB: Philadelphia at Atlanta. We'd like to see Bobby Cox take another step toward that all-time ejection record. [ESPN]
• NBA: Playoffs, first round, Denver at San Antonio, Game 5; Los Angeles Lakers at Phoenix, Game 5. Lakers are still around? Huh. [TNT]
• NHL: Playoffs, conference semifinals, New Jersey at Ottawa, Game 4; Detroit at San Jose, Game 4. Fun in the Shark Tank. [Versus]
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Follow your ass, the sofa and the tv ... threesome of the gods on Deadspin