Match Mercifully Ends; Netherlands Beat Brazil 3-0

We know, lady. We know. This...this was not a good match. The Netherlands took out what little air was in this match almost immediately and then tacked on a meaningless third goal in added time, which we're not even bothering to GIF because, fuck it, this was a game for third place. Good news, Netherlands! You came in… » 7/12/14 6:19pm Yesterday 6:19pm

Netherlands Take Early 2-0 Lead Over Brazil

For a team whose coach wanted absolutely nothing to do with this glorified exhibition match, the Dutch have come out firing. A streaking Robben earned an early penalty in the second minute when Thiago Silva yanked his shoulder as he galloped toward the goal. Robin van Persie confidently hit the top corner to give the… » 7/12/14 4:49pm Yesterday 4:49pm

Every Univision ¡GOOOL! Of The World Cup, Ranked By Length

We've been fans of ESPN's excellent World Cup coverage, but for your money's worth it's tough to beat the live match broadcasts on Univision. Here's every goal scored thus far in the World Cup, stitched together into one very long ¡GOOOOOOOOOL!. Below you'll find a chart ranking every goal of the tournament by how… » 7/12/14 11:10am Yesterday 11:10am

How Vacant World Cup Stadiums Could Be Turned Into Housing

The World Cup ends this weekend, leaving Brazil with the heady task of deciding what, exactly, to do with the 12 stadiums that were built or converted for games. Two architects have published a proposal to convert the stadiums into something Brazil desperately needs: Affordable housing. » 7/11/14 4:15pm Friday 4:15pm

Among Thugs: Hooliganism and the Evolution of Soccer

This Sunday, roughly a billion viewers will tune in to the World Cup Final between Germany and Argentina. I know where I'll be at kickoff for what is unquestionably the planet's biggest sporting event: in front of a large television screen, cold beverage in hand, joining one-seventh of my fellow humans of Earth in… » 7/10/14 5:08pm Thursday 5:08pm

What Brazil's Loss Meant, And What It Didn't Mean

When you visit the Museu do Futebol in São Paulo, you are at one point obliged to enter a long, narrow, pitch-black room, in which the increasingly loud pounding of a heartbeat plays heavily over concealed speakers as images of the Maracanazo—Brazil's infamous loss in the final of the 1950 World Cup in Rio de… » 7/09/14 6:01pm Wednesday 6:01pm

Today's Brazilian Newspaper Covers Are Pure Sadness

If there's one thing to be thankful for in the wake of Brazil's World Cup meltdown, it's that the host country's stunning 7-1 defeat gave Brazilian newspaper editors a chance to cut loose and really go all-in with the despair. With that in mind, let's survey (via Newseum) today's best, saddest Brazilian newspaper… » 7/09/14 10:30am Wednesday 10:30am

Luiz Felipe Scolari Falls On His Sword

There's something about a mollywhomping that turns losers philosophical. As if there's no place to hide, no excuses that can possibly be made, and the only way to salvage some dignity is to humble yourself before a world already inclined to be sympathetic. After Brazil's 7-1 defeat at the hands of Germany, Seleção » 7/09/14 9:16am Wednesday 9:16am