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The Chicago Tribune has discovered the source of the White Sox's success this postseason: Manager Ozzie Guillen makes out with his players. No, really. After the ALCS victory over the Angels, Guillen kissed his sons in the dugout, then kissed Jose Contreras, then Freddy Garcia, then (gasp) owner Jerry Reinsdorf.

What's the source of this? Tribune columnist Dawn Turner Rice says it could be "a Latin thing" but says it's more because Guillen "geniunely feels for his players," which is actually kinda more scary. We'll just say this to White Sox players: Just in case, make sure everybody wears a cup for Game 1 on Saturday, OK?

Guillen Is The Tender Man [Chicago Tribune]

(Yep, that picture was taken during Monday's NLCS Game 5. The camera cut away, but right after that, Bush Sr. ripped Barbara's blouse off and knew her in the Biblical sense right there in the box seats. Afterwards, he threw up on So Taguchi.)