Mistakes? We don't make mistakes. So, this is your receipt for your husband, and this is our receipt for your receipt.

Hello! How are the twins?
Triplets, actually.
Really? How time flies!

If you're a bit of a stickler for paperwork — where would we be if we didn't follow the correct procedures?— you're ready to be a Deadspin advertiser. Click here to find out how. Oh, and by the way, we're told there's some sort of demographics survey or something, if you want to take it. They're giving away an iPod shuffle or something.

• Kensington Books
• Horsemen of the Esophagus
• Mobizzo
• Thrillist
• Hershey's