Not sure if you noticed or not, but the Minnesota Vikings have a bye this week. And we all know what that means!

So how are the Vikings keeping themselves busy? The gang at Kissing Suzy Kolber imagine how the week off is going for various players, including our pal Mr. Smoot.

Monday: Discreetly find hooker and attach her to milking machine. Realize the atrium of City Hall isn't discreet enough.
Tuesday: Call McKinnie. Discuss potential sexual encounters that do not involve the penis. Agree to try space docking.
Wednesday: Try space docking on woman flown in from Buckhead. Fail. Spray pussy with Lysol.
Thursday: Study coverage technique on tape. Realize tape is actually a copy of "The Country Bears". Curse Misssissppi State education.
Saturday: Call Sly Croom. Congratulate him for being black.
Sunday: Watch Goodfellas. Tell friends Jimmy Two Times is favorite character. Go get the papers get the papers.

If the various scenarios posited here aren't what's actually happening in Minnesota this week, we'll be extremely disappointed.

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Vikings' Bye Week Itinerary [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
Deadspin Hall Of Fame: Vikings Sex Boat [Deadspin]