Because everyone we talk to in St. Louis says it's been raining all day and is likely to rain all night, so we are less than optimistic that we'll see the NLCS Game 5 tonight. Therefore, we must receive our sporting fix tonight from Monday Night Football, or, as we like to call it, "Tony Kornheiser Thinks Of All Kinds Of Nasty Things To Say But Doesn't Say Any Of Them, And Then Hates Himself For It And Writes About It In Between Rest Stops."

Though tonight could also be called Pretty Boy Gets Killed By Large Angry Men, or even The Urlacher-Leinart Paris Hilton Faceoff. The best answer, though, is that's going to be a bloodbath for our Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals in their first MNF appearance in seven years. (Steve Young's last game, actually.) Unfortunately, they have a dome, and they're in Arizona, and it's football, so we won't be so fortunate to have a rainout.

We had been hoping to avoid this game. Drats.

(Oh, if you want some MNF live-blogging, you can find it here.)

(UPDATE: Yep: The game has officially been postponed until tomorrow. )