Let's think, for a moment, of just how long a timespan 24 seconds. It's how long it takes a shotclock to run down. It's how long it takes us to type two sentences. It's how long it takes Elijah Dukes to type two words on a text message. And it's how long the supposedly CONTROVERSIAL Kobe Bryant video runs, the same video the fellas who are selling it for two bucks on the Web think it going to make them $100,000.

Some might think the video means something, but mostly, it's pretty much this:

"Andrew Bynum? What the fuck?" Bryant says in disgust. "Are you kidding me? Andrew Bynum? Fucking ship his ass out. Are you kidding me? We're talking about Jason Kidd. But they didn't even want to do that. Now we're here in this fucked up position."

That's it. Twenty four seconds. And now "The Kobe Video Guys," as they're inventively calling themselves, are saying they have another tape, this one audio only, in which Kobe says he's going to the Bulls. We're not sure why anyone would pay $2 for this, or why SI.com would devote two stories to it, but hey, we're not Web entrepreneurs.

To sum up:

1. Film video in which Kobe says "fuck."
2.
3. Profit.

Kobe Bryant: "Dr. Buss In An Idiot" [Inside Hoops]
Underground Kobe Video Ain't All That [SI.com]