Fun fact: The last pitcher to win 350 games — Warren Spahn of the Milwaukee Braves — reached the milestone on Sept. 29, 1963; a 2-0 victory over the Chicago Cubs. The Braves' catcher that day? Joe Torre. On Monday Torre watched the feat again, this time sans cup, as Roger Clemens won No, 350 in an eight-inning, two-hit 5-1 victory over the Twins. And this time Torre's parting gift was a possible trip to the DL for Alex Rodriguez, who tweaked a hamstring while running the bases in the first. "We're going to sleep on it and see how it feels in the morning," Rodriguez said. "Right now it's just a little sore, tender." Cynthia Rodriguez's blouse could not be reached for comment. Rodriguez was pulled after reaching second base in the sixth and telling third-base coach Larry Bowa that he wouldn't be able to score on a single ... which makes me wonder how Jason Giambi ever stays in a game. Bobby Abreu had three hits for the Yankees, including the go-ahead homer in the sixth.

Red Dawn. Like West Nile virus and the Avian flu, Cardinals fever is in danger of spreading. St. Louis has scored 11 runs in two consecutive games, on Monday dispatching Arizona 11-3 behind Scott Rolen's four RBI. Hope nothing happens during the next week or so to break their momentum!

Introducing The Man Whose Name Sounds Like A Sneeze. If we knew that Eric Hinske was the answer to all of life's problems, we would have begun worshipping him long ago. Hinske's bases-loaded triple and Dustin Pedroia's two-run double led the Red Sox to a 7-3 win over the Rangers. Hinske was a late addition after Kevin Youkilis was scratched with a sore left quadriceps during batting practice. You know, we thought we heard the plaintive cry of Yooooouuuuukkkkk! just before the game.

Cubs Above .500! Everybody Mambo! I begged the Nationals not to trade Alfonso Soriano*, and see what happens? He comes back as a Cub, gets two hits, an RBI and a stolen base to lead Chicago to a 7-2 win over Washington.

Mark Buehrle Examines His Career Options. If there's one thing that's going to piss off Mark Buehrle and cause him to eschew that contract extension with the White Sox, it's leaving with a lead and then getting no win against the Orioles. That would do it for us, too.

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* = May not have begged.