The second half of the season has already begun to delight me: I got to laugh myself silly over Bay Area broadcaster Ted Robinson's speculation that Alex Rodriguez would be signing with the Giants for 2008. Sure, the Giants would love a second shot at one of their players breaking the all-time career HR record, this time doing it without cattle steroids. But now all they need are seven Muni buses filled with cash, and the assurance that the team will look the other way when A-Rod visits the Clift Hotel to pick up blondes-who-are-not-his-wife. I know that it doesn't bother me ... Bonds will most likely be gone by next season, so that frees up some cash.

Anyhow, Rodriguez hit his 31st homer of the season in the Yankees' 7-3 win over Tampa Bay on Thursday (baseball's back, kids!). And while technically not cheating, it did come against the Devil Rays, so I'm not counting it toward his career totals. Sorry for any inconvenience. Meanwhile, Eric Byrnes' dog disagrees with Robinson, saying that Rodriguez will go to the Diamondbacks. But then he says that about everyone.

Adrian! I Did It! Look, it's the first day back, and I don't really have the energy to explain the weirdness that occurred with Adrian Beltre on the basepaths in this game between the Mariners and Tigers. So you'll have to figure it out yourselves.

Still Waiting For That No-Hitter, Though. Somewhat hard to believe that in their 46-year-old and storied history, the Mets have never had back-to-back homers to lead off a game. But on Thursday, Jose Reyes and Ruben Gotay ended the shame with consecutive home runs as New York beat Cincinnati 3-2.

White Sox Win! Orioles Don't! Were you aware that Jim Thome is rapidly closing in on 500 homers? Why was I not informed?