I think we all remember the halcyon days of April 1883; a simpler time, when Chester Allen Arthur was President, the Brooklyn Bridge had just opened and the Philadelphia Phillies franchise had no losses whatsoever.

On May 1 of that year, on opening day, the Phils lost 4-3 at home to the Providence Grays (after blowing a 3-0 lead). Pitcher John Coleman took the loss, finishing with a 12-48 record for the season. On Monday, the franchise made it 10,001 losses as 44-year-old Jamie Moyer was pounded in a 10-3 loss to the Dodgers. Jeff Kent and Matt Kemp each hit three-run homers (LA is one game ahead of San Diego in the NL West). More fun facts: Moyer grew up in Philadelphia, and his first big-league win came as a Cub against Steve Carlton and the Phillies, 7-5, in 1986. Brad Penny (11-1) got the win on Monday, becoming the first Dodgers pitcher to begin a season 11-1 since Doug Rau in 1977.

Barry Needed A Me Break. With Barry Bonds (0-for-his-last-22) resting in a secure, undisclosed location, the Giants lost 3-2 to the Cubs on Monday, Chicago winning its 16th game out of the past 20, and fourth in a row. But Bonds vows to be back in the lineup today, so long as Dorothy and Scarecrow don't lose the oil can.

Mediocre Team Beats Slightly Inferior Team, 6-4. Alex Rodriguez's two-run homer led the Yankees over Toronto 6-4, New York's ninth win in its past 12 games overall, and fourth of five since the All-Star break, for those still keeping track.

The Best Pitcher Named Kason You Will See This Season. Rookie Kason Gabbard tossed a three-hitter for Boston's second shutout of the season, a 4-0 win over the Royals.
Boston got solo homers from Dustin Pedroia and Manny Ramirez in the fourth and a two-run shot by David Ortiz in the sixth, all off Brian Bannister (5-6).

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I Did It For You, Alyssa! Dmitri Young's go-ahead, three-run homer led the Nationals to a 4-3 victory over the Astros. Young lifted his batting average to a team-best .339 and his RBI total to a team-best 52. It was his ninth homer of the season.