No first place for you, Chicago Cubs. Oh, why, why? (Bangs head against refrigerator). The Philadelphia Phillies, bolstered just before game time with the addition of pitcher Kyle Lohse from the Reds (6-12, 4.58 ERA, tiny, ill-advised goatee), beat the Cubs 4-1 on Monday. The loss dropped Chicago to one game behind the front-running Brewers in the NL Central. Cole Hamels went eight innings for the Phils, and Tadahito Iguchi hit his first homer with Philadelphia, which has won nine of 10 and trail the NL East-leading Mets by three games. Of course, everyone on the Phillies' roster is now injured, so take that into account.

Angels Need Tony Danza, And Now! If there's one person we're pretty sure is not on steroids, it's Ichiro Suzuki, who had three hits to bolster Miguel Batista's four-hit, seven-inning pitching as Seattle beat the Angels 2-0. The Mariners have won four straight and are three games back of the Angels in the West.

Tata, Athletics. Jordan Tata; remember that name. Brought up to take the place of injured Kenny Rogers in the Tigers' rotation (hey! You've forgotten his name already, haven't you?), Tata went seven strong innings in Detroit's 5-2 win over Oakland.

Luis, Luis, Oh No, You Gotta Go Now. You know who should be here? Luis Castillo. He would have loved this. As Castillo packed his bags for New York (Mets! Not Yankees ...) Joe Mauer muscled in three runs to lead the Twins over the Royals 3-1. It was Minnesota's third straight win.

It Goes To 11. Does anyone give a fig for Carl Crawford's 11th-inning homer that gave the Devil Rays a 5-4 win over the Blue Jays? Anyone?