Yesterday, we learned about Rockies first baseman Todd Helton's DUI arrest and were treated to his I-am-too-drunk-for-pictures-right-now mugshot, but specific details were sparse. We knew that Helton was arrested a few blocks from his house at 2:39 a.m., but that was about it. Thanks to TMZ, which has obtained a copy of the police report, we now know a little more about what allegedly happened early Wednesday morning:

According to the report, cops tracked down Helton after receiving a tip that Todd's black Ford F150 had struck a median and then parked at a nearby gas station.

When cops arrived to the scene, police say they saw Helton stumbling out of the gas station ‚ÄĒ stinking of booze ‚ÄĒ and clutching lottery tickets in his hand.

Cops say Helton denied striking a median ... but "made spontaneous statements about drinking two igloo cups of red wine."


Wow. That just might be the saddest goddamn thing I have ever read. Please take a moment to picture Todd Helton‚ÄĒwho made $20 million last year, is the greatest player in Rockies franchise history, and a borderline Hall of Fame first baseman‚ÄĒsitting at home, drinking red wine out of an igloo cup at 2:30 in the morning, and then deciding that he needs to drive his truck to the gas station a few blocks away so that he can buy lotto tickets. That's something that your uncle Todd who stays in the basement during Thanksgiving does.