Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.
•Many players were reportedly laughing as they left a team meeting where they were told of Mark Mangino's resignation. Perhaps they had also been sent this photo of an unknown flyer with a familiar waistline and hairline. (Thanks to Dr. Mongoose for the pic. Update)
•In other, more successful college football news, Oregon is heading to the Rose Bowl for the first time since 1995, where they'll face Ohio State. The automatic bid system seems like a good idea until you get a matchup of two fairly decent teams emerging from horrible conferences.
•Days after a sliding clinic with Joe Girardi, Mark Sanchez injures his knee while sliding. It doesn't matter, because the Bills and the Bills, and the Jets keep their playoff hopes alive. Thankfully, the media's collective knees are fine, so they'll be able to cover Sanchez's poise with their customary reverence.
•The revolving doors at third in Philly and short in Boston bring in their newest warm bodies; Placido Polanco to the Phillies and Marco Scutaro to the Red Sox. We're one Orlando Cabrera short of a Three Tenors of Utility Infielders.
•A day after signing Billy Wagner, the Braves add Takashi Saito. I like it. You want to recreate Atlanta's dominant pitching of the turn of the century? Sign guys who were at their most effective back then.
•Albert Pujols launched a center for adults with Down syndrome. At this point, he's the only unimpeachable athlete we have left. I will now ignore media coverage for the next ten years to preserve this image of him.