One lucky lady just so happened to pick the right weekend to go club-hopping down in the Bahamas. And one lucky magazine just so happens to have her available to comment.
Granted, there is nothing particularly earth-shattering from "Jane Blonde's" first-hand report, but here are some amusing portions from her time-line as she and her friends stepped foot into club Atlantis on that fateful night when Alex Rodriguez drowned his sorrows in the neck of a 19-year-old girl:
10:15 p.m. As we proceed from the bar to the casino floor, we notice that all the major news stations start breaking news about A-Rod's confessing to steroid use. Awkward!
11 p.m. He introduces himself. "I'm Alex," he says, and we die. The security guard then ropes off his table. But we are in!
11:05 p.m. Oh, but only for a moment. Two women, a blonde and a brunette, sashay over and proceed to bump us out of the immediate vicinity of A-Rod ... but not far enough.
11:30 p.m. Make small talk with "blonde bombshell," as his attention is clearly focused on the brunette at this point (see picture). She is 19, and from Virginia Beach. "What brings you to the Bahamas?" we ask, innocently. "We're here for Alex," she says. "He's going through a really hard time right now."
12:02 a.m.: Madonna's "Hung Up" blasts over the speakers.
We look pointedly at "Alex" and whisper to our new friend, "This must be awkward." She smirks and nods her head in agreement. We're bonding!
Then they leave. Maybe next time New York will have the foresight to send Emeritus down to the Bahamas on the weekend to this type of work. That is, of course, he's not wearing an orange construction helmet chanting with teenagers.
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Oh, and thank you for your continued support of Meet the Matts. Ah, Mets' fans. They're special.
New York Intern Confesses 'I Was Hot Gal Next To A-Rod's Hot Gals' [Daily Intelligencer]