Oh hello. I am Choire Sicha, your 9/11 guest blogger, coming to you from lower Manhattan. Make of that what you will.

I am a former Yankees fan who has long since seen the light (the light being that the Yankees epitomize pretty much everything that is wrong and horrible about New York City.) Men in sports that I would like to sleep with, in order, if I were not previously occupied, include: Ben Roethlisberger (oh c'mon, as if you don't expect some man on man phone sex lines to show up in the phone records-seizing discovery period of his rape lawsuit!); little tennis critter Mike Bryan BUT NOT his evil twin Bob; YES Network yes-man and former Yankee d-bag Paul O'Neill (totally grudgey); and of course Caster Semenya. (Hayyy.) Oh and Shawne Merriman. If it's good enough for a not at all drunk Tila Tequila, it's good enough for me. NOW LET'S GET TO THE SPORTS.