Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.
• Northwestern, otherwise known as the Billy Zabka Finishing School For The Mean Rich Kids In John Hughes Movies, is playing Illinois at Wrigley on Saturday. Because it is nominally a home game for Northwestern, they've gone and painted Wrigley's facade a hideous, shrieking purple. I say this both as a native Illinoisan and an NU alum: Northwestern is a Chicago school like Princeton is a New York City school, i.e., no one in the city really gives a shit, except maybe a few Goldman recruiters. Also, take a look at the end zone. A prediction: Some NU kid is going to break his head against that wall, and the world will be down one future management consultant.
• The photo here pretty much sums up last night's Eagles-Redskins game.
• The Mavs gave the Hornets their first loss, and the Oklahoma City ThunderSonics ended the Jazz's five-game winning streak. This naturally put one Utah columnist in mind of 19th century German metaphysical poetry.
• Josh Pastner got a victory that at some point will probably be vacated.
• Anyone want to watch two old hacks wiggle their canes at each other? In one corner, you have Rick Reilly® wrestling with a straw man of his own devising and very nearly losing; in the other, you have John Feinstein, who in the time it takes you to finish this sentence will have written seven new books about golf for Little, Brown. Who ya got?
• Our pals at Slate are taking their sports podcast on the road tomorrow. Anybody near Raleigh, N.C., is urged to attend.
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